Author: Mark Roeder
Date: 2024-05-07T14:00:00+00:00
Keywords: Fiction; MM; LGBTQI+
Description: J.C.’s life changes forever when four juvenile delinquents are forced to help him as their community service. One of them in particular, a muscular boy named Mateo, catches his eye, but could a hunky boy like him be interested in a skinny redhead like J.C.? J.C. set out to clear the junk-filled lot next door to combat his loneliness and create a rose garden in memory of his recently deceased mother, but with the help of neighbors and four juvenile delinquents, he begins to transform the space into a community garden where others who are lonely come to socialize and tend their own little raised

The Not So Secret Garden

The Not So Secret Garden

© 2024 Mark A. Roeder

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictionally. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.  All trademarks are the property of their respective owners and no infringement is intended.

Cover Design: Ken Clark

ISBN: 9798323102921

All Rights Reserved

A Special Thanks to My Patrons

This book was made possible in part by my patrons on Patreon.com: Russell Harkins, Albert McCann, Victor Freeman, Mark Andrews, Robert Powell, John F Callow, John Smeallie, Paul Covert, Ken Clark, Jon Lukas, Martin Jaragosky, Markus Seemeier, Cameron Smith, David Manfredi, John Webb, Urban Skeppstedt, Terry Jones, Andi, Evan Marshall, Dale Bay, Victor Thomas, Mark, Jerry Bradshaw, Yancey, Joshua Coleman, Ernest Clark, Douglas Rayner, Greg Howard, Jack, James Holtz, Tony Marquardt, Jim Hertwig, Daran Willis, John Hawk, Gerasi and Stephen Duff.

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Acknowledgments

The amazing cover for this book was created by Ken Clark.  He, along with Jim Adkinson, David Tedesco and Marcus Seemeier, put a great deal of time and effort into correcting my numerous typos and other errors.  I appreciate the hard work of each.

Other Novels by Mark A. Roeder

Also look for audiobook versions on Amazon.com and Audible.com

Blackford Gay Youth Chronicles:

Outfield Menace

Snow Angel

The Nudo Twins

The Very Troublesome Ghoulish Bizarre Boy

Phantom World

Second Star to the Right

The Perfect Boy

Verona Gay Youth Chronicles:

Dark Angel

Ugly

Beautiful

The Soccer Field Is Empty

Someone Is Watching

A Better Place

The Summer of My Discontent

Disastrous Dates & Dream Boys

Just Making Out

Temptation University*

Scarecrows

Scotty Jackson Died… But Then He Got Better

The Antichrists

Bloomington Boys—Brandon & Dorian*

Bloomington Boys—Nathan & Devon*

Lawn Boy

Bloomington Boys—Scotty & Casper*

Two Boys & A Funeral

Bloomington Boys—Tim & Marc*

Bloomington Boys—Elijah & Haakon*

Bloomington Boys—Banshee*

Brendan & Casper

Someone Is Killing the Gay Boys of Verona

Keeper of Secrets

Masked Destiny

Do You Know That I Love You

Altered Realities

Dead Het Boys

Dead Boys of Verona

This Time Around

The Graymoor Mansion Bed and Breakfast

Shadows of Darkness

Heart of Graymoor

Come Back to Me

Skye & Colin

Marshall Mulgrew’s Supernatural Mysteries

Christmas in Graymoor Mansion

The Fat Kid

Brendan & Casper: Older & Better

Light in the Darkness

Transitions

Three Months

Dream Lives

Farm Boys

Wicked Intent

Second Chances*

There and Back Again: An Adventurous Boys Holiday

Big Brothers

The Worst Swap Ever

Lost in Tydannon: The Battle for Holbytlaton

Bloomington Gay Youth Chronicles

A Triumph of Will

Temptation University*

The Picture of Dorian Gray

Yesterday’s Tomorrow

Boy Trouble

The New Bad Ass in Town

Bloomington Boys—Brandon & Dorian*

Bloomington Boys—Nathan & Devon*

Bloomington Boys—Scotty & Casper*

Bloomington Boys—Tim & Marc*

Bloomington Boys—Elijah & Haakon*

Bloomington Boys—Banshee*

Phantom Begins

Peralta’s Bike Shop

Hate at First Sight

Born Too Late

Colin University

The Youngest Frat Bro Ever

A Boy Toy for Christmas

Purrfect Book and Curiosity Shoppe

Hoosier Boys

The Not So Secret Garden

Second Chances*

*Crossover novels that fit into two series

Adam Bluestone Novels:

Teen Idol Secrets

Falling Star

Take Two

Suddenly Real

Other Novels:

Cadets of Culver

Lake Maxinkuckee Summer

Benji & Clyde

Fierce Competition

The Vampire’s Heart

Homo for the Holidays

For more information on current and upcoming novels go to markroeder.com.

J.C. (James Chester)

Verona, Indiana

May 1, 2022

I stared out the kitchen window as I sat eating toasted cheese and barbecue potato chips.  My only company was Mags, the main character in the audio book I listened to as I ate.  This wasn’t the first time I’d listened to Foundations, the story of a thirteen-year-old orphan chosen by one of the magical Companion horses of Valdemar to be trained as a herald, but the repetition was comforting and the familiar characters made me feel a little less alone.

I sighed as I gazed at the overgrown and junk filled lot next to the house.  I wasn’t an orphan.  I was lucky enough to have a dad, and a pretty good one too, but I missed my mom.  Fourteen years wasn’t enough time with her.

She’d been gone only a month and I missed her every day.  I missed my old home too, and my friends.  Everything had changed so fast.  One day, Mom was fine.  The next, she didn’t feel at all well.  She was diagnosed with liver cancer and two weeks later, she was dead.  Then, my dad got a job offer he couldn’t pass up, superintendent for a county school system, only the job was in Indiana, far away from our life in Laurel, Mississippi.  I seriously think Dad would have turned down his dream job if I hadn’t given him the okay, but as much as it hurt to move, I already hurt so bad inside I didn’t think it would make much difference.  I understood, too, that Dad missed Mom as much as me.  I lost my mom.  He lost the love of his life.

“What do you think of this place, Mom?  Crappy view, huh?” I asked as I stood and walked to the window.

I put my plate in the dishwasher, turned off my book and walked through the house.  At least our new home reminded me of the one in Laurel—old, Victorian, two story, but not too big, hardwood floors, gingerbread trim outside and lots of quirky details like built-in cupboards and a root cellar for keeping vegetables cool.

My footsteps echoed as I took it all in, emphasizing the emptiness, but I think this was better.  I don’t think I could have remained in our old house with all its memories of Mom now that she was gone.

She would have loved this place.  She would have placed colorful geraniums in pots all along the porch railing right after moving in, then she would have started in on flower beds.  Soon enough, would come the garden and she would “volunteer” me to help.

I grinned, remembering how I’d complained and whined.  What a brat!  But, I helped and then Mom would make a salad for supper with lettuce I’d helped grow or we’d have corn on the cob, using corn I’d picked in our garden minutes earlier and it had made me feel proud that I’d accomplished something, contributed something, instead of merely taking.

I walked outside on the front porch.  Yeah, the railing needed geraniums, red ones.  The yard was decent.  Two large and unthinkably old oak trees stood between the house and the street.  There was a huge snowball bush to the side of the house and unkempt rose bushes here and there.

I walked around to the garage, which was newer than the house, but still a century old.  I dug through the packing boxes Dad and I had dumped there and soon discovered the one marked, “Gardening.”  Inside, I found the long-handled loppers and a pair of leather gloves.

I spent the afternoon pruning dead stalks out of the roses, and then pruning them back the way Mom had taught me.  I’d complained I was sorry I ever learned because that meant I had to do it, but now I was glad I knew what to do.  I removed crossing canes and opened up the center of the bushes for air flow.  In Laurel, it would already be too late to prune roses, but spring was not as far along way up north.

I felt less lonely outside and almost like my mom was near me.  How many hours had the two of us spent doing this?  Pruning roses was like a little piece of our time together I could revisit.  The rose bushes began to look much better, too.  They didn’t look like much right now, but they’d grow new canes surprisingly fast and then there would be roses everywhere.  I didn’t know what color because one rose bush looked much like another, but it didn’t matter.

Would the scent of roses fill the air on hot summer days here as it did in Laurel?  I hoped so.  Of course, it was so hot and humid in the summer months in Mississippi that going outside was a bit like walking into an oven, but I was tough.  I could take it.  Roses and I had that in common.  No matter what one did to them, they came back.  They were survivors.  I had to be one now, too.

I made myself lemonade and then sat on one of the porch swings out front after I finished.  I eyed the lot next to the yard as I sat there.  It came with the house, but what a mess.  The yard was reasonably well-kept, but the lot was overgrown and filled with junk.  I was surprised the neighbors didn’t complain, but then Dad and I had barely moved in and the mess had obviously been there for years.

What would Mom do about it?  Plant an orchard of dwarf fruit trees?  Create a formal garden, a rose garden, a cottage garden?  Maybe she’d till it up, with my help, of course, because Dad was hopeless with such things, and plant a vegetable garden.

Garden.  That was the keyword.  I doubt my mom could have withstood the eyesore next door for a day without beginning to plan.

The sense of sadness and longing for my mom was suddenly so overwhelming, I put my face in my hands and began to cry.  I wanted her to be here!  I missed her so much!

I allowed myself to cry for a while.  Mom had told me crying was okay.  My dad had even cried when she died, so I cried when I felt like it, at least when I was alone.  I tried not to let Dad see me upset since we’d lost Mom.  I knew he was suffering too, and didn’t want to increase his pain.

I finished my lemonade.  I was rested up now.  I eyed the lot.  Mom would do something with it.  I would too.  Surely, Dad would let me.

I stood, went back to the garage where I’d left my gloves, put them on and then walked over to the lot.

Ugh.  It was worse than it looked from the porch or the house.  Old tires, the frame of an old swing set, the remains of a refrigerator and a washer dryer set.  There was a lot of rusty junk peeking out from the tall weeds.  It looked like an overgrown junkyard.

I grasped the nearest unidentified piece of rusted metal and tugged.  The dead vegetation reluctantly loosened its grip and I pulled it free and into the yard.  It looked like it might possibly have been part of a vehicle, but I had no idea what type or what part.

I went in for another piece of junk.  Some of it was too big for me, but I pulled out tires and one mass of rusted junk after another.  When Dad pulled into the drive a little after five, I hadn’t even made a good start.

“What are you up to?” Dad asked, taking in the small stacks of debris in the side of the yard.

“I pruned all the roses and then I got to thinking about the abandoned lot.  Do you have plans for it?”

“No.  I’ve been trying not to even look at it.  Have the neighbors complained?”

“No, but I was thinking.  I’d like to clean it up and make a garden there.  Can I?”

“Is this a trick question?  You clean up that lot and you can do anything you want with it.”

“All right!  I can open my own brothel!”

“Do you even know what that is?”

“Not a clue, but a garden is what I have in mind.”

“No brothel, but a garden is fine.”

“Thanks.  I really missed Mom today, but then I began pruning the roses and it made me feel sort of like she was with me,” I said.

“Come here, J.C.,” Dad said, then pulled me into a hug.  I hugged him back tightly.  “I’m sorry I’m away so much, but with this new job it’s unavoidable.”

“I understand.”

Dad released me and gazed at me.

“What?  Do I have a smudge on my face?”

“No, but you remind me of your mother.  You have her eyes.  When I look at you, I know a part of her is still with me.”

“You okay?” I asked.

“I’m as okay as I can be.”

I liked that Dad told me the truth instead of pretending nothing was wrong.

“I thought the garden could be sort of a memorial to Mom.”

“She loved gardening.  Your mother was a nightmare at the farmer’s market and at nurseries.  I kept telling her she had plenty of plants and didn’t need more, but she always said...”

“But, I don’t have this plant,” I finished for him.

“Yes, and I always caved in.  I think a garden is a wonderful idea.  It will be up mostly to you.  I’m going to be very busy all summer with the budget and... well, you don’t want to hear about it and I don’t want to talk about it.  Your mother also said I have a brown thumb.”

I laughed.  “Yeah, she wouldn’t let you even touch any of her plants.”

“I will help you do something with those appliances.  Maybe we can get someone in to remove them,” Dad said.

“Great.”

Dad rubbed the bridge of his nose.

“I’m too tired to cook.  How about burgers at that burger place you liked?”

“Ofarim’s?  Sure.  That would be great.”

“You clean up and I’ll change.”

We were soon on our way.  We could easily have walked, but Dad was tired.  Two minutes after we departed, we pulled up in front of Ofarim’s.

I eyed a couple of boys near my age as we entered.  They wore Verona High School Football shirts and looked like jocks.  I’d steered clear of jocks back in Laurel.  Their size alone made them intimidating.  Not that I’d had any actual trouble with them, but their world was alien to me.

Dad and I both ordered double-cheeseburgers, fries, Coke Zeros and chocolate shakes when the high school age waitress arrived with ice waters.

“Verona can claim more than its share of famous people,” Dad said, taking in the memorabilia on the walls.  “A rock star, a movie and Broadway star and a professional race car driver.  I’d like to meet Dayton Davenport.  I heard he still lives in town.  I remember when he raced at Daytona and he almost won the Indy 500.”

I smiled.  Dad was a big racing fan.  I thought it was okay, but told him it was pointless since they raced around and around, but never actually went anywhere.

“Considering the size of the town, I’d say your chances are good.  I’d rather meet Jordan from Phantom or Dorian Calumet.  I love his movies.”

“Maybe we’ll both get our chance.”

Our burgers arrived and were as good as the first time, which is to say, delicious.  We had eaten at Ofarim’s the very first day we arrived in Verona.  Dad and I could both cook, but Dad had been so busy working and we’d both been so busy unpacking and organizing we’d mostly survived on take out.

I wished Mom was here.  I think she would have liked Verona, although I couldn’t imagine her moving away from Laurel.  She probably would have for Dad to get his dream job.  Mom was like that, always thinking of others.

We took our time eating and then headed back home.

“That drive was a killer,” Dad said.

“I must have fallen asleep because it only seemed like a couple of minutes to me.”

“Imagine that.  I’m going to do some unpacking,” Dad said.

“I’ll help.”

I felt like we’d already unpacked forever.  We obviously had too much stuff, even after getting rid of so much before moving.  We started in on the endless task again.  I carried boxes into the rooms where they belonged and then unpacked them and put things away.  Mom would have had her own organizing scheme, but we were forced to do our best.

“I found the rest of the towels.  They were in a box marked ‘kitchen items’,” I said about an hour later when I walked into the living room, where Dad was trying to set up the DVD player.  I’d likely have to finish that task.  Dad was not so good at such things.

“I wonder who did that?”

“Considering that you labeled all the boxes, that would be you.”

“Towels are used in the kitchen.”

“Bath towels?  How did Mom ever put up with you?”

“I never understood that myself.  I’m just glad she did.”

Mom.  She was never far from our thoughts.  I wondered if a time would come when I could remember her without experiencing pain.

“Anyway, I found them and put them in the linen closet by the bathroom.”

“Great.  I’m sorry you’ve been stuck with most of the unpacking.”

“I don’t mind.  It keeps me busy.  If I stay busy, I don’t think so much.”

“It will get better, James.  I lost my mom right after graduating from college.  It was rough, especially at first, but it gets easier as time passes.”

“Do you still miss her?”

“Sure.  I always will.  My main regret is that she wasn’t able to meet her wonderful grandson.”

“I have a brother?” I asked.

“I’m talking about you, Goofball.  I know she would have loved you.  Losing her hurt, but now when I think of her or see something that reminds me of her, it makes me happy.”

I nodded.  Maybe things would get better, but losing Mom still sucked.  It wasn’t fair, either, but Mom had once told me that life was neither fair nor unfair.  It simply was.

Dad disappeared into the office he’d set up in a little room in the back of the house, but that was okay.  I knew he was there.  With him around I wasn’t alone, even if I couldn’t see him.  Maybe when school started up in August, I could make a few friends so I wouldn’t be so lonely.  School was still going here, but it hardly made sense for me to attend for only a couple of weeks.  Dad had given me the option, but why endure being the new kid when I wouldn’t have time to make any friends anyway?  Perhaps I’d made a mistake, but I didn’t want to have to explain why we moved here because that would require explaining that my mom had died.  I didn’t want to talk about it.

I went back outside and continued dragging junk and trash out of the lot.  Now that I had the go ahead from Dad, I was more eager than ever to get the lot cleared.  It wouldn’t be long before it was time to plant a garden and I was going to have to move it to even have a chance of being ready.

I worked until the sun set and it became too dark to see, then went inside and listened to my audio book until I grew too sleepy to continue.  I then fell into a blissfully exhausted sleep.

***

Dad made pancakes, scrambled eggs and bacon for breakfast.  Yeah, the pancakes were the frozen kind that only needed to be microwaved, but he still got up early so he could make breakfast before heading off to work.

I did my part by getting up to eat it.  It was nice to have breakfast with Dad.  Mom had always made us breakfast, except sometimes on weekends when Dad would step in to make his French toast.  He claimed he’d studied in France to learn how to make it, but, of course, that was bullshit and we all knew it.

Mom made the best blueberry pancakes, but then Mom could make anything taste great.  Dad and I had learned almost everything we knew about cooking from her, despite his claims of having studied in France.

Dad’s pancakes weren’t as good as Mom’s, but what mattered the most now was spending time with him.

The kitchen felt empty after Dad left for work, so I quickly cleaned up the breakfast mess and headed outside to begin my task for the day.  Keeping busy kept my mind occupied.  That’s exactly what I needed right now, for more than one reason.

I separated the junk by type as I pulled it out.   Iron went in one pile, old tires in another and plastic in yet another.  I hadn’t been working for ten minutes when I received a nasty surprise.  Wasps had built a nest inside a tire and they were not happy about being disturbed.  I shoved the tire away as fast as I could and it rolled out into the yard.  I don’t know if the wasps who hadn’t flown from their nest enjoyed their ride or not, but they were confused enough I didn’t get stung.

I normally didn’t like to kill any type of insect.  Honey bees, bumble bees and the vast majority of wasps rarely stung, but red wasps, striped wasps and yellowjackets were just plain mean.  I walked to the garage, found the wasp spray in a box and gave the nest and wasps a good spray.  I’d been stung in the past and did not want to experience it again.

After dealing with the wasps, I pulled our large trash can over by the lot and dumped all the smaller items into it. That done, I began pulling out more stuff.  After my first dangerous encounter, I kept my eyes out for anything else that might sting, but didn’t discover any more nests.

The piles grew as the sun traveled across the sky, but it seemed that no matter how many things I pulled out, there was no less clutter in the lot.  I doubted the junk was magically multiplying, but it almost seemed like it.

“I’m glad to see someone is cleaning up that mess.  It’s been nothing but a dumping ground for far too long.”

I looked up and spotted an older lady gazing at me from the sidewalk.

“It’s a mess for sure,” I said.

“I noticed the moving van a few days ago, but didn’t see anyone about or I would have come over to welcome you to the neighborhood.  I’m Virginia.  I live right across the street,” she said, pointing to a large Victorian home much like ours, directly across from the lot.

“I’m J.C.   Dad and I just moved here.  He bought the house and this came with it,” I said, indicating the lot.

“Well, I am very glad to see you cleaning it up.”

“I’m going to make a garden here, as a memorial to my mother.  We lost her recently.”

“Oh, I’m very sorry, Dear.  I lost my husband several years ago, but we had a wonderful life together.”

“Thanks.  She loved to garden and got me into it.  I want to do this for her.  Well, me too.  Gardening makes me feel like she’s near and keeping busy helps me deal with losing her.”

“Yes, keeping busy does help.  Well, I won’t keep you.  Good luck with your garden.”

Virginia was only the first to notice my efforts in the unsightly lot.  No one who passed failed to wave or say, ‘hello.’  I had the feeling some walked by to get a look at what I was doing.

I worked alone and yet I didn’t feel alone.  Just being near others provided companionship in a way.  It was much better than remaining isolated inside.

I didn’t go in until my stomach grumbled that it was past time for lunch.  I was eager to get back to work, so I made myself a peanut butter and blackberry jam sandwich while I listened more to the story of Mags.

As soon as I finished, I poured myself a glass of iced water, carried it out to the porch and then went out and rooted around in the garage.  I came out with a small table and two old lawn chairs, which I carried out to my work area.  I set them up and then brought out my iced tea.  Now, I had a place to sit when I took a break and there was a seat for visitors, too, just in case.

I had no more than started on my task again when a young woman pushing a stroller stopped.

“Hi.  I’m one of your neighbors.  We live just down the street.  I am so glad you are clearing this junk out.  We have two boys in grade school.  They’re adventurous and even though we’ve told them not to play here a thousand times, they do.  I’m so afraid they’ll get hurt.”

“There is a lot of rusty iron and sharp edges in there, and I got into a wasp nest this morning.  It’s definitely not a safe place to play.  I intend to turn this into a garden.”

“Oh, that’s wonderful.  Maybe I can get Chad to come over and give you a hand after he comes home from work.  I’m Marsha.”

“I’m J.C.”

“It’s very nice to meet you.  Welcome to the neighborhood.”

“Thanks!  It’s nice to meet you, too.”

Marsha moved on, pushing her stroller.  People were definitely friendly in Verona.  Our new town had that in common with Laurel.

The piles grew and there still didn’t seem to be less junk in the lot.  I suspected the junk was multiplying behind my back more than ever.  I was trying to clean up the mess, but so far I’d only created an additional mess at the edge of the yard.

I worked steadily, taking a break for iced water now and then.  It was hard to envision a garden here, but I was determined to create just that.  Mom had taught me a lot about gardening, mostly by making me help.  I resented that at first, but grew to like most of the tasks, except weeding.  That was never fun.  Thanks to all that, I figured I would make a decent gardener myself.

Virginia returned in the late afternoon, carrying a pie.

“I baked this for you and your father.  It’s my way of saying thanks for improving my view.”

“That is so nice of you.  Thank you, but so far, I think I’ve only created a big eyesore.  Please have a seat,” I said, setting the pie on the little table.

“You’re welcome.  I love to bake, so I’ll use any excuse.”

“I love to eat pie.  I use any excuse for that, too,” I said, sitting down as well.

“I see you’re making progress.”

“It doesn’t feel like it.  So far, I’ve only succeeded in making the yard look worse.”

“I’m sure it will soon start looking better.”

“I hope so.”

“My husband and I moved here in the ‘70s.  Back then, there was a house on that lot.  It was exactly like yours, only in a very dilapidated state.  The older neighbors told me the homes were built by brothers in the 1880s.  They were twins, living in twin homes.”

“Huh.  That’s interesting,” I said.

“The house burned down shortly after we moved here.  It was too far gone to save anyway, but it was still sad.  The lot has been vacant since and some of the owners of your home, particularly the last, used it for a dumping ground.  I think a few others may have added to the mess as well.”

“I wouldn’t think the town would allow it.”

“Verona is a small town.  I don’t think there are ordinances against it.”

“Thanks for telling me about the house that stood here.  It’s a shame it burned, but Verona doesn’t seem to have a shortage of old homes.”

Virginia laughed.

“The entire town is one big historical district.  There are newer homes here and there, but very few, and some of those were built to look old so they’ll fit in with the neighborhood.”

As we talked, Dad pulled into the drive and walked over to join us.

“Hey, Dad, this is Virginia.  She lives across the street and look at this, she baked us a pie.”

“Well, it’s very nice to meet you and thank you so much.”

“As I told your son.  I love to bake.  I also appreciate what he’s doing.  I’m sure everyone in the neighborhood does.”

“You’re home early,” I said.

“No, I’m not.”

“Really?  I didn’t know it was that late.  I meant to fix something for supper.”

“I will take care of that,” Dad said.

Dad and Virginia chatted, while I listened.  It felt good merely to sit for a while.

Virginia departed.  Dad took the pie inside to start on supper.  I got back to work.  I put in another hour before Dad called me in.

“Whoa.  Pork chops!” I said as I sat down.

“I stopped by the grocery on the way home.  The mashed potatoes are instant.”

“Aren’t they always?”

“Yeah, I can’t tell the difference between instant and real anyway.  I did open the green bean cans myself.”

“Just don’t toss them in the lot.”

“There goes that plan.  I see you made a lot of progress today.  The piles are growing.”

“Yeah, but I think it’s going to take longer than anticipated, much longer.  The more I work, the more needs to be done, at least it seems that way.”

“That’s usually the way of it.  I’m glad you’re sticking with it.”

“Oh, I won’t give up.  I refuse to let the lot beat me.  One of us is going down and it isn’t going to be me.”

I told Dad about the twins who built twin houses and the young woman who had stopped by during the day.

“I’m glad one of us is meeting the neighbors.”

“You met Virginia.”

“It sounds like you’re meeting them all.”

“Hardly, but a lot of people waved or said, ‘hello’ as they passed.  It’s less lonely here than it was.”

“I’m glad.  Maybe you can make some friends this summer before school starts.”

“Maybe, but my focus now is that lot.”

“I’ll come out after supper and help.”

“You don’t have to do that.  You’re tired.”

“I am, but it’s sitting behind a desk tired.  Doing something physical will be good for me.  Besides, I don’t want the neighbors to think I make you do all the work.”

“Well, that is what I’ve been telling them.  I cook, clean, do laundry and all the outside work, too.  They all think you’re a horrible slave driver.”

“You big liar.”

I laughed.

We cut the pie, which was cherry and it was the best pie ever!

“You can’t buy a pie this good,” Dad said.

“Yeah, but I’ll still share the rest of it with you.”

Dad did join me outside after supper.  We hadn’t spent much time together since moving and I’d missed it.

“How am I going to get rid of all this?” I asked as we pulled out some of the larger pieces together.

“Yard sale?”

“Yeah, right.”

“The iron we can sell for scrap.”

“Sell?”

“Oh yeah, it’s not worth a lot but we can probably get a scraper to come take it away.  He’ll want to make a profit, of course, but you’ll still get a little something.”

“Great, getting rid of it will be nice.  Making a little cash while doing so makes it better.”

“We may have to pay to get rid of the appliances.  I’ll take care of that.  The actual trash we can get rid of week by week.  We can store bags of it out behind the garage, or I might rent one of those big bins.  We’ll figure it out.  I’ll pay for all that.”

“Thanks.”

A good looking, very well-built guy of perhaps thirty walked down the sidewalk and then cut across the grass toward us.

“Hey.  I’m guessing you’re J.C.  You met my wife.  I’m Chad.”

“That’s me.  This is my dad.”

“I’m Justin,” Dad said, shaking Chad’s hand.

“I work for the Sherriff’s Department.”

“I’m the school superintendent.”

“Wonderful.  Our twins are in grade school.  Anyway, I am here to help.  I came with gloves.”

“I can use all the help I can get,” I said.

With Chad’s help, we tackled the refrigerator, which was especially difficult because it had partially sunk into the ground.  The three of us together were able to dislodge it and tumble it over and over into the side yard.

“Marsha said you plan to create a garden here?” Chad asked.

“Yeah, as a memorial to my mom.  I’m thinking it would be nice to put in dwarf fruit trees and vegetable beds right by the sidewalk so anyone passing can pick fruit and vegetables.”

“That’s very philanthropic of you.”

“I just thought it would be cool.  Back in Laurel, that’s where we came from in Mississippi, there was an older couple that had fruit trees and beds like that with a sign encouraging everyone to pick what they could use as they passed.  In grade school, it was fun to walk past and pick a peach or some cherries or something to eat on the way home.  I thought it would be cool to do that here.  I want to plant roses and flowers, too, but it’s a big lot, so I figure there will be room for everything.”

As we talked, Virginia walked across the street and joined us.

“It’s your nosey neighbor again,” she said with a smile.

“You aren’t nosey.  Oh, that pie is great!” I said.

“The best I’ve ever tasted,” Dad added.

“Thank you.”

“Have a seat,” I said.  “You can supervise.”

“Thank you.  I will sit down.  I’m sorry I can’t be of help, but I wanted to come where the action is.  It’s much better than sitting alone at home.”

“You are welcome any time,” I said, earning a smile from Dad, but I truly meant it.

Dad, Chad and I got back to work.  The three of us were able to move the washer, dryer, old range and other items I’d been working around.

Marsha soon showed up with the boys, two one-gallon jugs of iced tea, and cups.  Virginia disappeared only to reappear a short time later with chocolate chip cookies.  We stopped for a break of tea and cookies.

Curious neighbors appeared, some who had waved at me earlier in the day now stopped to inquire what was going on.  One of them, it turned out, scrapped iron.  When he found out what I was doing, he offered to haul off all the metal and give me all the money to go toward my project.  I was delighted.

With even more help, we began to make more progress.  Chad and Marsha’s twins even pitched in.  They were ten, but stuck into the work like pros, moving whatever they could handle.

Before it became too dark to see, Brett, the neighbor who scrapped iron, brought his truck over and the men loaded in the bulky appliances for the first load.  I thanked Brett profusely.

Our impromptu party broke up and Dad and I went inside and cleaned up.  We met in the kitchen, where Dad put on a kettle for tea.

“I can’t believe so many people helped,” I said.

“That shouldn’t have surprised you.  Such things happened often in Laurel.”

“I’m so glad they did.  I can’t believe the appliances are gone.  I tried pushing the washer over earlier today, thinking that maybe I could move it that way, but it was too heavy.”

“There are still heavy pieces out there.”

“Yeah, but none that are so big I can’t move them.  I never dreamed we’d make so much progress.  It would take me a week to do what we did this evening, and some of it I couldn’t have done at all.”

“We obviously picked the right town,” Dad said.

“Well, your job picked it.”

“I’ll take credit anyway.  I think of it as another of my brilliant ideas.”

“Brilliant, huh?”

“Watch it.”

I laughed.

Dad poured us mugs of English breakfast tea.  We sat at the table, drank tea and ate the last of Virginia’s chocolate chip cookies.

“I wish Mom was here.  She would have loved this evening with all those neighbors dropping by.  She would have been carting out tables and chairs for everyone and turning it into a party,” I said.

“You’re right there.  The tables and chairs aren’t a bad idea.  There are a couple of those 8’ folding tables in the garage and lots of chairs.  We should set those up in the side of the yard in the shade.  I have a feeling our yard is going to be a gathering place for a while,” Dad said.

“I’ll get on that tomorrow when I need a break from moving junk.”

“Your mother would be proud of you, J.C.  I’m proud of you.”

“I’m merely trying to stay busy.”

“Bullshit.”

“Dad!” I said.  He didn’t usually use language like that.

“I mean it.  You are doing loads of work, not so much for yourself, but for others.  You’re like your mother in that.  You have dreams of people walking by, picking strawberries and apples.  You’re not creating a garden for yourself.  You’re not even only creating it in the memory of your mom.  You’re creating it for the community.”

I shrugged.

“It’s something I want to do.”

“Most kids would lay around and play video games all day.”

“Okay, if that’s what you want, but I’ll need a new game system, an expensive one.”

“Don’t even think about it.”

I grinned.

Mateo

I eyed my older brother as he sat with the other football jocks in the cafeteria at VHS.  Next year, that was going to be me.  Not only that, but I was going to outdo Agustin.  It wouldn’t happen right away, since I had never played on a team, but my big brother didn’t begin playing until his freshman year either.

Next year was going to be different.  I’d move from middle school to high school and I was going to cease being overshadowed by my older brother.  I’d caught up with him some.  I was not as muscular as him yet, but I was close.  He was two years older and I’d gotten a late start, so all things considered I thought I’d done exceedingly well.  I was determined to surpass him in every way.  Someday, I’d be the stronger and would no longer have to put up with his insults or his abuse.

Agustin shot me a disdainful look when he spotted me walking past.  I stared right back at him.  He could kick my butt, but I wasn’t afraid of him.  Much.  I definitely wasn’t going to dignify his attitude with a reaction.

I moved on toward my usual lunch table with my tray of Salisbury steak, soft pretzel with cheese, mashed potatoes with gravy, corn, roll and salad and joined my buds.

“We hanging out after school?” Kai asked.

“I was planning to hit the gym.”

“Mateo, you live in the gym.  You need to get a life, man.  Hang out with us,” Brody said.

“I do not live at the gym.  I go every other day.  I have to get in shape if I’m going to make the football team.”

“That’s next year!  It’s ages away!” Noah said.

“Yeah, and you’re already built.  You have muscles bulging everywhere,” Kai said.

“It’s not next year, practices begin in August so it’s only a few months away and I’m not strong enough.  I can’t even bench press 125 yet.”

“I probably can’t bench press 50,” Brody said.

“That’s because you’re a weakling,” I said.

“I am a nerd.  We’re supposed to be weaklings.  I’d get kicked out of nerddom if I was too strong.”

“Is nerddom a word?” I asked.

“I don’t think so,” Kai said.

“I’m a nerd, so if I say it’s a word, it’s a word, even if it’s not.”

I grinned.  These were my buds, a somewhat motley crew.  Brody was a stereotypical nerd with ordinary brown hair and eyes and a slim build.  Noah was a stereotypical skater, with long blond hair and blue eyes, not especially handsome, but his skater vibe made him attractive.  Kai was our token Asian, his words, not mine, and definitely not stereotypical because he was not the smartest guy around.  The other Asian dudes I knew were super smart.  He was very handsome and on the hunky side, which was better than being smart in my book, but then again, I wasn’t the smartest guy around either.

“Come on, hang with us.  We’re going to mess around downtown after school,” Noah said.

“I guess I could lift weights after.”

“There you go!” Brody said.  “We’re going to have fun.”

“Yeah, I have spray paint in my locker,” Kai said.

“Why do I have the feeling I’m going to regret this?”

“Because you probably will,” Noah said, patting me on the back.

He was probably right.  I often did.  My buds tended to get me into trouble, but hanging out with them was too much fun to resist.  I would still work out, only later than planned.

Lunch ended too quickly and the afternoon passed too slowly, but finally the day was over and the guys met me at my locker, probably to make sure I didn’t slip off to the gym in the Graymoor Mansion.

“Let’s go,” Kai said, as soon as I’d switched out my books.  As usual, I had too much homework.

The four of us headed out, our backpacks swung over our shoulders, except for Brody.  He wore his like a nerd.  I had long ago attempted to intervene and get him to wear it the cool way, but he insisted it was a nerd requirement and he was quite proud of being a nerd, I didn’t know why.

As soon as we were beyond the grass, Noah tossed his skateboard down and hopped on.  I had a thing for Noah and it was all because he was a skater.  I generally kept my attraction to other boys a secret because my older brother was a homophobe and Dad wouldn’t be thrilled either.  I wasn’t exactly sure what Dad would do if he found out, but I didn’t want to know.  Agustin would kick my ass for sure.  I got more than enough harassment and abuse from him the way it was.  Noah knew about me, which worked out because he was most definitely gay, too.

“Why are you so quiet?” Kai asked me.

“I was thinking about my brother being a dick,” I said, which was just enough truth that I wasn’t lying.

“That is his hobby, right?  He didn’t smack you again, did he?” Brody asked.

“Or twist your arm behind your back until you screamed?”

“No and no.  I was just thinking about his general dickness.”

“Sorry, not a word,” Brody said.

“Dickness isn’t a word, but nerddom is?” I asked.

“You got it.  Don’t blame me.  I’m not making up the rules.”

“I’m pretty sure you are,” Noah said.

“Hey, I’m the smart one here, so I should know,” Brody said.

“Yes, your supreme intelligentness,” I said.

“I don’t think that’s a word either,” Noah said.

“I shall allow it,” Brody said, loftily.

“Only because it compliments you,” Kai said.

“Well, yeah!”

Verona had a fairly pathetic downtown.  It was mostly buildings on two sides of one street for a couple of blocks, but it was all we had.

“Hey, we could go to Ofarim’s instead of looking for trouble,” I said.

“Where’s the fun in that?” Kai asked.

“I feel like ice cream,” I said.

“Funny, you don’t look like ice cream,” Brody said.

“You’re not allowed to speak anymore,” I said.

“Come on,” Kai said, leading us down an alley.  He pulled out cans of spray paint and handed them out.  He walked over to a trash can and sprayed a peace symbol on it.

“Is this the ‘60s now?” Brody asked.

“Come on, I noticed a great spot the other day,” Kai said, leading the way.

He took us around to the back of Café Moffatt where a fence blocked the view of the trash bins from the next street.

“Yeah, Kai, this is truly amazing.  Mmm, love that smell,” I said.

“I mean the wall, football jock wannabe.  It’s crying out to be tagged.”

Kai immediately began spraying red paint on the pristine, but very dirty white wall.  The rest of us stood back, trying to figure out what he was painting.

“I got it.  A dick,” Noah said.

“Life size, for me anyway,” Brody said.

“Uh, Brody, that’s got to be about ten feet long,” I said.

“What’s your point?”

Noah and Brody stepped in to help.  I stood back and watched.  I was not that excited about graffiti.  I merely liked hanging out with my friends.

“If you’re not going to help, give me the black,” Kai said.

It was then that we heard the unmistakable sound of someone clearing his throat behind us.  We turned.

Crap.

“I see you found something new to do.  Hand them over.”

Chad held out his hand.  He was a deputy for the sheriff’s department and he’d busted us a few times for minor violations.

We handed over the paint.

“I don’t suppose there’s any chance of getting these back later?” Kai asked.

“Nope.”

“Well, we’ll just be going then,” Noah said.

“Not so fast.  Defacing private property is a bit more serious than your usual activities.  I warned you boys.  Come with me.”

Double Crap.

Two minutes later, we were squeezed into the back of a squad car and hauled to the sheriff’s department.  Chad let us out when we arrived.

“Follow me,” he said in a resigned tone.

We were escorted to a bland room.

“Sit,” Chad said and then departed.

“My dad is going to kill me,” Kai said.

“I don’t even want to think about what mine might do.  Thanks a lot, guys,” I said.

Chad soon returned.

“Good news, boys.  The owner of Café Moffatt isn’t pressing charges.  She was having the back of the building repainted this weekend anyway.  You got lucky.”

“So, we’re free to go then?” I asked.

“Not so fast.  This time, it will cost you.”

“I didn’t even do anything,” I said.

“He’s right.  He didn’t.  Mateo didn’t even want to come with us.  He didn’t do any painting,” Kai said.

“Funny, I seem to recall him holding a paint can.”

“So, what now?” Noah asked.

“Community service.”

“Oh man,” Kai said.

“Who decided we have to do community service?” I asked.

“I did.  I’ve already discussed you guys with the judge.”

“Hear that, we’re famous!” Noah said.

“Not a good time,” I said.  “What if we promise never to do it again?”

“No, I warned you there would be consequences the next time I caught you breaking the law.  You did the crime, now you do the time.”

“This bites!” Brody said.

“You can thank yourselves,” Chad said.

“How about one more chance?” I asked.

“No.  If I keep letting you guys off with a slap on the wrist, you’ll progress on to more and more serious crimes and then you’ll be in real trouble.”

“We’re screwed,” I said.

An hour later, we were on our way, enjoying the luxurious back seat of Chad’s squad car.  He stopped at each of my friend’s homes, where he escorted them to the front door and handed them over to their parents.  I grew more uneasy with each stop and soon my doom was at hand.

Chad pulled into Graymoor Estates, the trailer park where I lived.  I didn’t know why the park was given such a grand name, perhaps so those living there could feel less ashamed about residing in a trailer park.  It wasn’t actually a bad place to live, but who wants to live in a trailer?

The car stopped at our lot.  My mom was out the door and walking toward the car before Chad even got out.  I couldn’t hear what my mom was saying, but she wasn’t happy.  Chad opened the door and let me out.

“Thank you for bringing him home,” Mom said, then turned on me.  I winced at the disappointment I saw there and feared her anger.

“You.  Inside.  Now.”

“I was going to...”

“You can forget whatever you were going to do.”

I stepped up onto the porch, cluttered with bikes, lawn furniture and a broken weight machine that I wished worked.  Agustin and I had worked out on it like madmen until he busted it a year ago.  He was quite pleased with himself for breaking it while he was working out and claimed he was so strong the machine couldn’t take it.  I wasn’t pleased.  It meant I couldn’t work out, but then Skye, the guy who ran the gym in the Graymoor Mansion, took pity on me and arranged for me to use the equipment there free of charge.  By the way, there was no connection between the Graymoor Manson and Graymoor Estates, except for the names.  The mansion was grand, the estates most certainly were not.

I went inside, followed closely by my mother.

“You need to stop hanging out with those thugs,” Mom said.

“They aren’t thugs.”

“So, it was your idea to deface public property?”

“Actually, no.  It was theirs.”

“Exactly.  They are a bad influence.  You already have one strike against you for being Hispanic.  You don’t need the reputation of troublemaker and law breaker to go with it.”

“Mom....”

“Don’t Mom me.  Go to your room.”

“Am I grounded?”

“That will be for your father to decide.”

I was not looking forward to that conversation.  I went to the room I shared with Agustin and sat on the edge of my bed.  I should have stuck to my original plan.  If I had, I would have been working out in the gym in Graymoor or perhaps relaxing in the hot tub after my workout, but now I was stuck here, my mom was pissed at me, my dad would be pissed and I had to do stupid community service.  My friends were not thugs, but maybe I should stop going along with the others when they wanted to get into mischief.

I started on my homework at the small desk I shared with Agustin, hoping the sight of me working might make my mom less angry at me.  I kept at it for a good hour before I heard someone coming.  It was only my brother.

“Hey, jailbird.  I heard you got hauled in and that now your ass is grass.  Way to go, dumb ass.”

“Shut up,” I said.

Agustin smacked me in the back of the head.

“Oww!”

“I do want to thank you for making me look good.  Compared to you, I’m the ideal son.”

I had a few things I wanted to say about that, but decided it wasn’t worth the pain so I kept my thoughts to myself.

Agustin proceeded to ignore me, which he usually did unless he wanted to harass me or smack me around.  The next footsteps I heard were lighter and undoubtedly belonged to our younger brother, Gabriel, who was eight.

“Stop,” Agustin said, as Gabriel began to step into the room.  “You know you’re not allowed in here.”

“Come on in.  It’s my room, too,” I said.

Agustin glared at me, but said nothing as our little brother entered and sat on my bed.

“Mom said the police brought you home.  Are you in big trouble?”

“Yeah, he was arrested for being ugly.  He’ll probably get life,” Agustin said.

“My friends were doing some graffiti and I got picked up with them.  I have to do community service.”

“That’s not so bad, but Mom is not happy with you.”

“I’m used to it.”

“That’s what happens when you hang out with losers,” Agustin said.

“They aren’t losers,” I said.

“They have to be if they hang out with you.”

“Whatever.”

“Mateo, get in here!” my dad yelled.

“Now, you’re in for it,” Agustin said.

I walked up the hallway with Gabriel trailing behind.

“Chad dropped in and told me he picked you up with some other delinquents.”

“Yes, but I didn’t actually do anything.  I was just there.”

“Next time, make sure you’re not.  When are you going to start making better decisions, Mateo?  I’m not sure I care for your friends.  That Noah seems more than a little fruity.”

“He’s okay, Dad,” I said, trying not to cringe at the word fruity.

“I’d keep an eye on him if I was you.   He might try something, but I’m sure you can take care of yourself.  Now, I’m not going to tell you who you can and can’t hang out with.  My dad did that to me and it pissed me off.  What I want you to do is think.  If your buds are going to do something that might get them in trouble, like today, don’t be a part of it.”

“I won’t.”

“Chad says you have community service.  You make sure you do a good job.  I don’t care what it is, or how much you hate it, you do your best, understand?”

“I will.”

“Good man.  We’ll leave it at that then.  I think community service is punishment enough.”

I breathed a sigh of relief.  I wasn’t grounded.  I was thankful for that.

“Supper is almost ready.  You can set the table, Mateo,” Mom said.

I did so without complaining.  I needed to keep a low profile for a while.  I wasn’t receiving any extra punishment, but Mom was not happy with me.

A few minutes later, we sat around the small kitchen table with plates of spaghetti and garlic toast.  We had spaghetti quite often, probably because money was tight and it didn’t cost much to make.

I didn’t think of us as poor, but we lived in a trailer park and my parents definitely couldn’t afford a house.  Our trailer was crowded and there was no money for extras.  Most of what we had was used when we got it, which I didn’t mind that much.  I wasn’t fond of wearing Agustin’s hand-me-downs, but Mom sometimes picked me up “new” clothing at yard sales.

I felt sorry for Mom.  I was sure she would have loved a nice big kitchen, in a nice house, but she didn’t complain.  None of us did because Dad did his best and I thought he did pretty well taking care of all of us.  I’d offered to get a part time job to help out, but Dad got mad and asked if I thought he couldn’t provide for his family.  It was a thing with him, so I never offered again.

The spaghetti was excellent and I wasn’t hungry when I finished.  I also didn’t complain when Mom pointed at me and told me I could do the dishes.  I would rather have been working out in the gym, but that would have to wait.  I was not going to ask.

After supper, Agustin took off with his football buds, Gabriel went out to play with other boys who lived in the trailer park and Dad took Mom on a “date.”  I wasn’t sure what they did on their weekly “date,” but I knew part of it was shopping for groceries in Plymouth, which didn’t seem very date-like to me.  They were often gone for hours, so they must have done something else and probably just enjoyed time away from Agustin, Gabriel and me.  I know I’d want time away from us if I was them.

I could have slipped off to the Graymoor Mansion gym to work out without them knowing, but I was no longer in the mood and didn’t feel up to the long walk.  I was beginning to think about my community service.  I hoped we didn’t have to wear stupid orange or yellow florescent vests like convicts on work release.  I didn’t need the humiliation.

I wondered about my friends.  They always ended up getting me in trouble.  They were great guys and Noah was definitely sexy.  I wondered if Dad could somehow sense Noah was gay.  He most certainly was.  I knew because we messed around sometimes.  I didn’t want to think about how Dad would react to that if he found out.  I knew how Agustin would react.  He’d beat me black and blue.  I intended to keep my sexual orientation a secret until I was strong enough to kick Agustin’s ass.

I finished my homework and enjoyed my time alone.  Privacy was not easy to come by in a trailer.  It was pretty much non-existent.  I closed the door to the room I shared with my brother and thought about some of the things I’d done with Noah in the woods by the park.

The first time we messed around was the most exciting, although we did more on the few later occasions we hooked up.  I could tell something was up when Noah asked me to hang back when Kai and Brody had to leave.  He led me onto the paths in the woods and then pulled me off the path.  That’s when I knew something was going to happen.  That’s when I knew all the too-long gazes, teasing and innuendo were going to result in action.

Noah stopped and turned to me.  We gazed at each other for several moments.  I knew he wanted to kiss me, but couldn’t work up the nerve, so I leaned in and kissed him on the lips.  Noah kissed me back and soon our tongues were in each other’s mouth and our hands began to roam.

The memories made me so stiff I had to free my rod from my shorts.  I did so and began to stroke while I thought about making out with Noah and feeling his slim firm body.

I clearly remembered when I groped his bulge and how surprised I was that it was so big.  I also remembered when he grasped my dick through my shorts and how it made me throb.

I pulled his dick out and it grew as I stroked it.  I thought I had a big one, but Noah was even longer and thicker.  We stopped making out and stroked each other with our eyes on our dicks.  Before long, Noah moaned and shot everywhere.  That sent me over the edge and I exploded.

I did the same as I stroked alone in my bedroom, barely grabbing a tissue in time.  I immediately felt more relaxed and less horny.  I needed that.

I tossed the tissue in the trash and opened the door.  Yeah, privacy was good, so was hooking up with Noah, but we didn’t do it often.  We had messed around a total of four times in about a year.  I could sense Noah wasn’t completely comfortable with it, so I didn’t push for more.  I didn’t want to mess up our friendship.

Gabriel returned too soon, but I’d had my time alone.  Solitude was all the more valuable for its rarity.

J.C.

“The chain gang is here,” announced a boy with a definite skater look as he stepped out of the sheriff’s department van.

“Yeah, don’t talk to us.  We’re bad,” another said.

The first two boys out of the van were followed by two more and one of them was... stunning.  He was, without a doubt, the hottest, cutest, sexiest boy I’d ever seen in my life.

“You must be the warden,” he said.

“Knock it off, Guys.  You give J.C. any trouble and you will have trouble, got it?” Chad said.

I felt uncomfortable as the boys sized me up.  Three were a little older and taller than me.  The hot one was about my age, but built.  I wasn’t sure I was a match for even the more average boys.

“Yeah, we got it.  Hey, I’m Mateo.  I’m in for murder.”

Even his name was sexy.

“Mateo,” Chad warned.

“Actually, I got in trouble for hanging out with these losers and because no one appreciates art.”

“Spray painting a ten-foot penis on the back of Café Moffatt is not art,” Chad said.

“A guy can dream,” Mateo said, as he grinned at me.

Mateo had muscles everywhere and those eyes...

“I’m Noah, one of the losers who got Mateo in trouble.  Sup?” said the skater-type boy, who turned out to be, guess what, a skater.

“Hey,” I said, bumping fists with him.

“Kai,” said a handsome Asian boy.

“I’m Brody,” said the boy who looked like a stereotypical nerd.  He didn’t look at all like he belonged with the others.

“Okay guys, J.C. is in charge.  You do what he says.  If you’re tempted to give him trouble, remember the alternative.  J.C., I’m heading out, but here’s my number.  If they give you any problems, I will deal with them.”

“He tazes us.  He does it for fun sometimes,” Noah said.

“He’s sadistic,” Mateo said.

“Uh, okay,” I said.

Chad departed, leaving me facing the four boys.  Me in charge of them was truly unnatural.  Chad had said he’d get someone to help me clean up the lot, but this was not what I was expecting.

“Well, uh.  I have gloves for all of you.  I’m working on clearing out this abandoned lot.”

“Please tell me it’s for a skate park,” Noah said.

“Actually, it’s for a garden, a community garden.  I’m going to create beds right by the sidewalk so people can pick stuff as they go by, like strawberries or whatever.  There’ll be fruit trees, too.”

For a moment, I thought I saw Mateo’s eyes light up, but perhaps it was only the sun.

“For like, anyone to come and just take stuff?” Kai asked.

“Yeah, some people don’t have money to buy fruits and vegetables and it’s just fun to be able to pick things off a tree or vine and eat it.”

“What’s in it for you?” Brody asked.

“Nothing, if you mean profit.”

“Nothing,” Kai said, as if he doubted me.

“Well, my mom died of cancer not too long ago and it’s been... hard.  We used to garden together and...”

Shit.  I was about to lose it right in front of these boys.  I bit my lip to keep from crying, but tears still welled in my eyes.

“Oh, man.  That’s rough.  Sorry, Dude,” Noah said.

“My grandmother died last year.  It was awful.  She used to have cookies ready for me any time I visited,” Brody said.

“Thanks,” I said, getting myself under control enough to talk.  “My mom loved gardening.  This started as a memorial to her.  It’s also a way for me to keep busy so I don’t have to think about her being gone so much.  I’ve also been lonely because I don’t know anyone here.  I’m sure you guys think I’m a big loser, but that’s why I’m doing it.”

“Ah, you’re not a loser, Man,” Mateo said.

“Yeah, you lost your mom, Dude,” Noah said.  “Any chance you might plant something smokable in your garden?”

“Yeah, he’s going to plant a big patch of marijuana for all to see,” Kai said.

“Hey, I’d stop by to pick some of that for sure,” Noah said.

“Let’s get to it,” Mateo said.

The boys grabbed up gloves and we walked out into the lot.

“You can grab anything.  I have piles for different types of junk,” I said.

We began to work and it was soon apparent that these guys were not going to give me any trouble.

“Where you from anyway?” Brody asked.

“Laurel, Mississippi.”

“That explains the accent.”

“I don’t have an accent, everyone else has an accent,” I said, making the guys laugh.

“That name is familiar.  Wait, is that where they film that Home Town show where they renovate houses?  My mom is nuts about that show.  She watches it all the time,” Kai said.

“Oh yeah, they were filming on our street for a while.”

“You know the couple in the show?” Kai asked.

“Yeah, everyone pretty much knows everyone in Laurel.”

“Sounds like Verona.  They know you, and your business.  There are few secrets here,” Noah said, gazing at Mateo for a moment.

“I’ll tell my mom I met a guy who knows her favorite TV stars,” Kai said.

“Well, it’s not like we hang out.  I’ve just met them and stuff.”

“Still, she will go crazy.”

“You could do your own show.  Next, on HGTV, Garden Renovation,” Mateo said.

“That’s probably already a show and I’m too boring for TV,” I said.

“You haven’t bored me yet,” Kai said.  “When Chad said we had to help clean up a lot, I pictured a mean old geezer in charge.”

“I’m fourteen,” I said.

“You’re just a kid,” Brody said.

“How old are you?”

“Fifteen.”

“Should I get you a cane or a wheelchair?” I asked.

“Funny!”

I stole looks of Mateo when I could.  The color of his hair was amazing.  I’d never seen anyone with that color of hair before.  It was bronze, which might sound like brown, but it wasn’t brown, not at all.  His caramel skin and brown eyes were perfect with his hair and his body... dang.  He had bulges in all the right places.

It's a wonder I didn’t get caught gazing at him.  It was a good thing pulling junk out of the lot didn’t take much thought because I had trouble concentrating around Mateo.

Chad returned when noon neared.  He brought lunch for the guys and even me.  I’d been too busy to even think about lunch.

“No complaints about lunch.  My wife made this,” Chad said, handing out boxes.

“Only one of them is poisoned.  Do you feel lucky, J.C.?” Kai asked.

“I feel pretty lucky,” I said as I took a box.

I opened it to discover a ham and cheese sandwich, potato salad, a package of barbeque chips, an apple, a huge brownie and a bottle of water.

“I don’t think she made these chips, Chad,” Mateo said.

“Do I have to cuff you?”

“Oh yes, please, Daddy!”

Chad shook his head.

“This is so good,” Brody said, after taking a bite of his sandwich.  “Tell her thanks.”

“Yeah,” the others and I said.

“These guys give you any trouble?” Chad asked me.

“No, they’ve been great.  Really,” I said.

“Good.  I’ll be back for you guys at five.  Behave yourselves.”

“We’re practically angels,” Mateo said.

“You’re practically something, but I don’t think I’ll say what since I know your parents.”

“He’s not too bad for a cop,” Noah said, when Chad had gone.

“His wife is nice.  His twins have helped clean up the lot and he has, too.”

“Would these twins happen to be girls?  I’ve always had a twin fantasy,” Kai said.

“No, boys, and they’re ten.”

“Figures.  They’re about useless.”

“They helped out quite a bit.”

“That’s not what I meant.  I had twin girls in mind, about my age and crazy about me.”

“They’d have to be crazy to like you,” Noah said.

“Babes love me,” Kai said.  “I’m so much sexier than boring white boys.”

“I am anything but boring,” Noah said.

“He’s right about that,” Brody said.

“Still, I pity you all,” Kai said.

I thought Kai was kidding, but I wasn’t sure.

I was glad I had taken Dad’s suggestion and pulled out the tables and several chairs earlier that morning, because we were using them now.  It was fun sitting with the guys, even if we weren’t exactly friends.

“Okay, Guys, back to work!” Mateo said, once we’d all finished eating.

“Hey, you’re not in charge.  J.C. is,” Kai said.

“Yeah, back to work,” I said, pretending to be bossy, which I truly wasn’t.

“Give a guy a little power and it goes straight to his head,” Noah said, but grinned.

The junk piles grew.  Brett stopped by with his truck a couple of hours later, and we loaded it with scrap iron, much reducing that pile.

Virginia appeared later with an assortment of cookies, peanut butter, chocolate chip, oatmeal and sugar.  I immediately called a break and ran inside and brought out the pitchers of lemonade I had chilling in the refrigerator.  We all thanked her profusely.

“It was nothing.  You boys are working hard.”

“It is most certainly something!  These are like my grandmother makes,” Mateo said between bites of a peanut butter cookie.

Virginia beamed.  She remained while we got back to work and before long another neighbor lady had joined her.  I couldn’t help but smile as they chatted away.  I had a feeling Virginia was lonely.  I hadn’t known her long, but I was pleased she was making herself a part of things and hoped she’d continue.  The cookies and the pie were nice bonuses to her presence, but I liked having her here.  She was like a grandmother I never knew.

I was a bit intimidated by Kai, Brody, Mateo and Noah at first, but they were okay guys, more than okay, and Mateo...  I was sure they’d all rather be somewhere else, but they weren’t slackers and they didn’t try to push me around.  They merely gave me a friendly hard time, such as making fun of my Mississippi accent.

“Y’all, this here lot is looking better, don’t ya think?” Kai asked.

“Cep en fur that big heap o’ stuff down in the holler,” Noah said.

“Very funny, guys.  I do not talk like that,” I said.

“We might be exaggerating a little,” Kai said.

“Try a lot.  Y’all...”

I realized what I’d just said.  The guys laughed.  Where I came from, most everyone said, ‘y’all’, meaning ‘you all.’

“Me saying that is your fault!  I hadn’t said, ‘y’all’ once today until you said it,” I said.

“Don’t worry J.C., you’ll learn the sophisticated Verona way of speaking soon enough,” Noah said.

“Not from you, Dude,” Mateo said.  “You sound like a you’re from California.”

“What’s this about sophisticated?  That is not a word I would associate with Verona,” I said.

“We are the cultural center of the universe,” Brody said.

“Sure, you are.  Verona is basically Laurel with a weird northern accent.  Maybe I can teach you guys to speak properly.”

“We speak good here in Verona,” Mateo said.

“That’s goodly.  We speak goodly,” Kai said.

I rolled my eyes.

“Did you have a girlfriend in Laurel?” Noah asked.

“Nah.”

“Boyfriend?” Kai asked.  I looked toward him quickly.  “It’s cool if you do.  It’s no big deal.”

“No, I didn’t have a boyfriend either,” I said.

“If that’s the way you swing, you’ll be okay here.  Verona is very progressive,” Brody said.

“Yeah, we even tolerate skater boy over there,” Mateo said.

“And dumb jocks!” Noah retorted.

“Yeah, there are some of those on my brother’s team and he’s definitely dumb.  I, of course, am brilliant,” Mateo said.

Noah shook his head, making me laugh.

I didn’t give out any info on my sexual orientation.  These guys seemed nice enough, but I didn’t know them so I wasn’t ready to divulge personal information.  Did Brody suspect I was gay?  If not, why did he go out of his way to tell me I’d be okay in Verona if I liked boys?

Our work continued and time passed so quickly I was surprised when Chad returned to pick up the guys.

“You’ve made a lot of progress.  Good job guys,” Chad said.

“Actually, J.C. did it all.  We sat and drank lemonade and watched him work,” Mateo said.

“They give you any trouble?” Chad said.

“Other than make fun of my accent, no,” I said, fake glaring at them.

“Come on, y’all.  It’s time to go,” Kai said.

“They think they’re funny,” I said.

“We’ve kept you entertained all day.  We should get extra credit for that,” Noah said.

“They are entertaining and they were tons of help,” I said.

“Great.  Okay guys, in the van,” Chad said.

“Dude, you’re okay,” Noah said, giving me a fist bump.

“Thanks.”

I watched as the van drove away.  Kai stuck out his tongue and Mateo gave me the finger, both of which made me laugh.  I liked those guys.  I couldn’t say we were friends, but it had been nice to be around guys near my age for a change.  I also felt more at ease about attending school in the fall.

I dropped into one of the chairs and gazed at the piles of junk we’d pulled out of the lot.

“You must be exhausted,” Virginia said.

“Pretty close, but we got a lot done.  If I was doing this by myself, I wouldn’t even be started.  There is a lot left to pull out, but all the big stuff has been removed.  It will take some looking to find some of what’s left.”

“I’ve had a wonderful day, thanks to you.  I’ve talked with several neighbors.  Everyone who passes wants to know what’s going on,” Virginia said.

“I’m glad to have you here and I’m not just saying that because of the cookies.”

“Thank you, J.C.  I’m too old to be of any help cleaning up, but I do love to bake.  It’s my way of contributing.”

“Your contribution is the best of all, but I mean it.  I like having you here.”

“Thank you, J.C.  I am going to head home a while.  Watching you work has made me tired.”

I grinned.  “I’ll see you soon, I hope.”

“Oh, you will.”

Mateo

“See something you like?” Noah asked with a smirk.

“Yeah, I’m real fond of that oak tree over there.”

“Liar.  You were checking out J.C.’s ass.  I suppose he is sexy in his way.”

“J.C.?” I asked.

“Right.  Pretend you don’t know who I’m talking about.  You’re into him.  That’s why you peeled off your shirt, to show off your muscles.”

“Hey, it’s hot out here.  See the sweat?”

“Yeah, but you’re showing off for him, aren’t you?”

“He’s amazingly sexy,” I said quietly as Noah and I carried yet more unidentifiable hunks of rusted metal over to the piles at the edge of the lot.  It was our last day of community service.  I should have looked forward to completing my sentence, but instead I was sad.

“I like hunky guys myself, but then you know that,” Noah said, then grinned at me.

“What are you two plotting?” Brody asked.  “You’re talking quietly, so you’re up to something.”

“World conquest.  It doesn’t concern you, but don’t worry, we won’t forget you when we take over.”

“Uh huh.”

I tried not to eye J.C. too much as we worked, but I stole glances at him and thought about him a lot.  There was something about his dark red hair and green eyes that did it for me.  I had trouble keeping my eyes off his sexy lips and his slim body inspired lustful thoughts.

I felt drawn to J.C. for another reason, too.  He carried an edge of sadness with him that made me want to take him in my arms and comfort him.  My mom could be a trial at times, and yet I couldn’t imagine losing her.  J.C.’s mom was gone.  He’d never see her again or hear her voice.  I didn’t know how he could handle that.

I gazed at the overgrown lot that we’d mostly cleared of junk and trash.  This was to be a garden memorial to J.C.’s mom.  He said himself that gardening was something they’d done together.  I guess creating it helped him deal with losing her, but he still carried a lot of pain with him.  I couldn’t help but want to make him feel better.  I was glad the guys hadn’t given him a hard time, but Kai, Noah and Brody weren’t bad sorts.  They had a true talent for getting into trouble, but they weren’t bullies or jerks.  We teased J.C. about his Mississippi accent, but that showed him we accepted him.

That accent—every time J.C. spoke my knees grew a little weak.  Noah was right.  I saw something I liked and it wasn’t merely J.C.’s handsome face and sexy bod.  I liked him, period.  Would he go for a guy like me?  A boy who lived in a trailer and who probably wouldn’t get to attend college?  I guess the biggest question was, did he like boys?  Occasionally, I thought I detected a hint of interest when he looked at me, but then I might only be seeing what I wanted to see.

I sighed and was glad Noah wasn’t close enough to hear.  Yeah, I saw something I liked.  The question was, did I have the balls to do something about it?

I was getting a bulge in my shorts.  What’s more, Noah noticed and nodded his head in enthusiastic approval.  He briefly stuck his finger into his mouth and moved it in and out, which both made me laugh and caused me to get a little harder.  My nuts were beginning to ache.  I wondered what my chances were for some alone time when I got home to relieve the pressure.  Probably not good.  I wished we lived in a real house and I had my own room, but I could wish all I wanted.  It wasn’t going to happen.

The afternoon slipped away and I had few opportunities to speak with J.C.  It’s not like I could fish for information about his sexual orientation with the guys around anyway.  Noah knew I was gay, he should after the things we’d done with each other, but Brody and Kai didn’t and I needed to keep it that way.  I wasn’t taking any chances that my brother would find out.  I was uneasy about my dad’s reaction, too.  Not being able to be open about my sexual orientation was just one more thing that wasn’t so good about my life.  Overall, things were pretty good, and even better now that I’d met J.C.

I had to find a way to continue our relationship, not that we truly had one.  I was nothing more than one of the junior convicts forced to help him.  J.C. seemed to like us all okay, but I wondered what he truly thought of me.  Did he think I was a loser because I’d been assigned community service?  Worse, did he think I was a thug who was only acting civilized to keep out of further trouble?

There had to be a way to spend more time with him.  Did I dare offer to help after today?  What would be my excuse?  Then again, I liked gardening, a lot.  I’d created the small one behind our trailer as a way to contribute something.  That was the reason I gave my mom and it was true, I wanted to do my part and Dad would go ballistic if I got a job to help out, but even more I loved the idea that I could plant a tiny seed and watch it grow into a large plant.  I’d even thought that maybe I could grow plants for a living someday and perhaps even own my very own nursery.  I didn’t tell anyone about that dream.  Agustin would call me a fag and Dad would probably think that was an occupation for pansies.  Mom would probably support me, but in doing so might create friction with Dad.  We did not need more drama at home.  Gabriel would be cool with it, but then he was the cool one among us.

Coward that I was, at least when it came to interacting with J.C., I let the time slip away without proposing to help out in the future.  I frowned when Chad arrived with the van.  I didn’t want to leave.

“Thanks so much for all your help, guys,” J.C. said as Chad opened the van door for us to pile in.

“Chad would shoot us if we didn’t, or at least taze us,” Kai said.

“I’m not buying it.  I knew this was community service, but you all really worked at it.  You’ve helped me so much and I appreciate it.”

“Knock it off, will ya?  You’ll ruin our reputation as delinquents and slackers,” Noah said.

“I wouldn’t worry about that,” Chad said.

“Ha. Ha.  You’re so funny!” Noah said.

“It didn’t suck as much as we thought it would,” Kai said.

“Yeah, and you’re pretty cool,” Brody said.

“Get in, guys,” Chad said.

“Well, we’ll see y’all,” I said as I climbed in.  My words weren’t exactly suave, but they made J.C. laugh, which was something.

I watched him through the window with a slight lump in my throat as we departed.  Noah noticed and gave me an exaggerated sad face, the jerk.

Chad let us out one by one.  I was the last again.

“Can you drop me at the Graymoor Mansion instead of home?  I want to work out,” I asked.

“Sure.”

“Great.”

“You’re up to a workout after working all day?”

“Yeah, it’s a different type of physical activity and I want to play football in the fall.”

“Maybe it will keep you out of trouble.”

“I hope so.  My parents, especially my mom, will not be happy if you hand me over to them again.”

“There is a way to avoid that.  You’re a great kid, Mateo.  You merely make some bad choices.  Think before you act next time.”

“You know, I really didn’t do any of the spray painting.”

“Being there while your friends were doing it was a bad decision.  I’m not the enemy, Mateo.  I’m a dad and I want what’s best for you.  I got into some trouble myself at your age.”

“Is this you trying to be cool?”

“Yeah, how am I doing?”

“Needs work.”

Luckily, no one was around when we arrived because it wasn’t exactly cool being seen climbing out of a sheriff’s department van.  I walked through the gates and toward Graymoor Mansion, an actual haunted mansion, I shit you not.  It was a popular bed & breakfast despite that or because of it.  It mostly looked like a nice hotel inside, not that I’d ever stayed in any hotel, nice or otherwise.  Everything inside was way old, except for the equipment in the gym.  That was new.  It was kind of like a museum with the added attraction of ghosts.  I wasn’t that big on museums, but there was interesting stuff to see, like suits of armor.  The ghosts were super cool.  I’d actually seen Etienne, the boy ghost of Graymoor, so I knew the place was truly haunted.

I entered the huge front doors and walked across the lobby, passing all the seriously old antique furniture that looked nothing like ours.  The route to the gymnasium twisted and turned and confused me some, but I had it memorized and it only took me a few minutes to pass through the Natatorium, which was a fancy name for the vast room where the pool was located.  It was all glass and very cool, but my destination was the gym, located through the doors at one end of the Natatorium.

The gymnasium in Graymoor was huge and contained every weight machine imaginable and even a hot tub.  I waved to Skye, the hunky guy who ran the place.  He was supposed to be about forty, but he looked like he was in his 20’s and was seriously hot.  He was very handsome with amazing dark hair and had muscles everywhere.  He could be my daddy any day.  I had fantasies about that, but didn’t want to think about that now because I was already worked up and didn’t want a huge bulge showing.

I was so horny I almost couldn’t stand it, but I intended to use my horniness to power my workout.  I walked to the bench press machine, set the weight and began.

I was tired from moving hunks of junk all day, but this worked my muscles in a different way and I loved the way it made me feel.  I moved from machine to machine, doing the exercises in the workout routine Skye had created for me.  He obviously knew his stuff.  No one looked like him without working out.  I’d seen him shirtless and his bod was perfect.  Mine was not, but I’d put on muscle and was developing some nice abs.  I was determined to pass up Agustin.  I couldn’t wait!

Others were working out in the gym, some guests of the b&b, some members.  I was the youngest, but there were a couple of older high school boys and three who looked like they could be in college.  I smiled to myself when I noticed one of the high school guys and two of the college boys were using less weight than me.  I’d come a long way from the average kid I was when I started.

I finished my workout.  I wanted to climb in the hot tub, but I was sweaty and dirty from the day’s work and from lifting.  I headed to the locker room, stripped and walked the short distance to the shower room.

Both were empty, but I felt as if I wasn’t alone when I turned on the hot water and began to shampoo my hair.  One of the many cool things about the Graymoor gymnasium is that I didn’t have to bring anything.  I could use the soap, shampoo, towels and washcloths provided by the hotel.

Getting soapy in the shower always made me horny, perhaps because that was about the only place I could jerk off in our trailer.  It was a bit risky to do it here, but that only made it more exciting.  I began to stroke.

I started to breathe harder and then the sense I wasn’t alone increased.  I turned around quickly when I felt a hand slide across my butt cheeks, but no one was there.  I was a little freaked out, but I needed to get off bad so I kept stroking.  I could swear I felt a hand grasp mine as I moved it up and down.  At that moment, I shot.  The relief was intense, but I could swear I heard a receding giggle and wondered if I’d been molested by the boy ghost of Graymoor.

I didn’t let my thoughts linger on the possibility.  Instead, I rinsed off and returned to the locker room as the high school boys were coming in.  I stole a few glances of them as they stripped to shower, but didn’t linger.  I changed into the swimsuit I kept in my little locker and headed for the hot tub.

I wondered about what happened in the showers as I eased into the bubbling hot water of the tub.  I was sure someone had touched me.  I had clearly felt a hand on my butt and then again around my own hand as I stroked.  I was a little freaked out by that and yet not as much as I would have thought.  Was that Etienne, the ghost I’d seen here before?  Or, could it have been my imagination?  I was seriously worked up when it happened.  I’d fantasized while jerking off before.  Maybe it was merely another fantasy, but I didn’t think so.

I put it out of my mind as I relaxed in the tub.  A few others were still working out.  I watched as Skye moved around the huge gym, helping out where needed, demonstrating how to do exercises and encouraging those using the machines.  He was dressed in black shorts and a dark blue tank top that showed off his muscular arms.  I liked the way his chest pressed against his shirt.  Skye was seriously hot.  I wish he would come into the showers and touch me like the ghost did.  I’d let Skye do anything he wanted.

Like that’s gonna happen.

It truly wouldn’t.  Skye was a good guy.  He wasn’t going to put the moves on a fourteen-year-old.  He’d definitely been kind to me.  I’d met him at the park during the Fourth of July festival nearly a year ago.  He was manning a tent advertising memberships to the Graymoor gym and giving demonstrations on free weights and a handful of machines.  He noticed me keenly watching him as he demonstrated exercises and explained how they worked various muscle groups.  He even let me try out some of the machines.

When the crowd thinned out for a few minutes, I told him how I wanted to get in shape so my brother couldn’t pick on me so much and asked if there was something I could do at home since I couldn’t afford gym memberships.  He gave me a membership right then and there, just like that.

I was a little suspicious that he might make a move on me the first time I came into the gymnasium, but he didn’t.  A little part of me was sorry, but mostly not because I quickly began to look up to Skye.  He taught me everything I needed to know and let me in on secrets about working out.  I learned over time that he loved weightlifting and was excited to see anyone else get into it.  He’d become my mentor, and he made for good scenery too.

I watched as Skye helped a boy who was about the age I was my first time here.  He was good with kids and I wondered if he had any of his own.  If he did, I bet they were buff.

I climbed out of the hot tub when I began to feel a little light-headed.  I grabbed a towel, dried off, and then waved to Skye as I departed.  I changed once more in the empty locker room and headed home, feeling tired, but also relaxed.  It was too bad every day couldn’t be like a Saturday, but soon summer vacation would begin.  I couldn’t wait.

It was a long walk home, but I didn’t mind.  I was used to walking.  I didn’t have a bike and I obviously couldn’t drive.  Brody sneaked his dad’s truck out now and then when the gang wanted to go somewhere beyond walking distance, but we’d have to be extra careful about that.  Getting busted again so soon after the graffiti incident would not be a good idea.

The guys did get me in trouble a lot.  My mom wasn’t wrong when she said I should stop hanging out with them, but they were my friends.  Instead, I was going to stop participating in anything that might get me in trouble, mostly anyway.

“You’re home late,” Mom said.

“I worked out after I finished my community service.”

“Oh yeah, today was your last day.”

“Yes.  Hopefully, I can reenter society.”

“Hopefully, you can stay out of trouble,” Mom said, poking my nose.

“I’ll do my best.”

“You’d better.”

“You know I’m a perfect angel.  That’s why I’m your favorite.”

“You’re no angel and I don’t have a favorite.  I love you and your brothers exactly the same amount.”

“Got it.  You love Agustin and Gabriel combined as much as you do me alone.”

“That’s not what I said.”

“That’s what I heard.”

Mom swatted my butt.  I walked through the living room and down the narrow hallway.

“Mateo!” my little brother called out as I passed his bedroom.

“What, Squirt?”

“I will ignore that vile insult instead of kicking your butt because I need help with my homework.”

“Hey, it’s not my fault if you’re short.”

“I’m not short.  I’m eight!”

“Oh yeah, I keep forgetting.  Okay, what’s giving you trouble?”

Gabriel’s trouble was math, which was not a surprise.  It wasn’t exactly my best area either, but I was quite capable of helping him with grade school math.  I patiently worked through the problems with him, but had him do them instead of doing them for him.

I was in Gabriel’s room almost until supper, but finally he seemed to get it and we finished with his homework.

“Thanks, Mateo!”

“You welcome, but you know you have to pay the price for me helping you.”

“Oh, no!” Gabriel said, scooting away from me on the bed.  He knew what was coming.

“Oh, yes!” I said.

I grabbed him by the legs, pulled him toward me and began to tickle him.

“No!  No!  Stop!  It’s torture!  Mom!  Anyone!  Save me!” he said between giggles as he squirmed to get away.

I sent my little brother into fits of laughter and then stopped.

“Finally!  My debt is paid!”

“Not quite!”

I tickled him for a few seconds more, then stood.  I turned to leave, but he jumped on my back.  I grabbed his legs and gave him a ride into the kitchen where Mom was setting out plates.

“Is your homework done, Gabriel?”

“Yes, Mateo helped me, but then he tickled me!”

“Hey, I don’t give homework help for free.  That was my fee,” I said, leaning down so he could climb off.

“Thanks, Mateo,” he said and hugged me.  I hugged him back.

“Since you’re here, you can both finish setting the table,” Mom said.

“Oh, my work is never done!” Gabriel wailed.

“Come on, drama boy.  The sooner we finish, the sooner we can eat.”

Life in our trailer wasn’t the best, but it had its moments.

J.C.

I watched as an elderly man slowly moved down the sidewalk in a wheelchair.  I’d seen him before and waved when he passed.  He even stopped to talk to Virginia now and then.  He wheeled over to her now and soon she waved me over.

“Lawrence has something for you,” she said.

“Hey.  I’m J.C.  It’s nice to meet you.”

“It’s nice to meet you, too.  I noticed you nearly have this place cleaned up and I thought this would help you find what’s left,” he said.

“Is that a metal detector?”

“Yes, a good one, too.  I did a lot of detecting in my time and found some nice pieces, but I have no use for this anymore.  I want you to have it.”

“Hey, this will help, but I can return it when I’m done,” I said.

“No, I’m sure you’ll find a good use for it.  It’s no good to me anymore.”

“Well, thank you.  That’s very kind of you.  How does it work?”

Lawrence turned it on and explained it to me.  I tried it out.  When I neared the edge of the pile of iron, the tone was high and loud.

“The tone isn’t the same for metal underground, but you’ll catch on soon enough,” Lawrence said.

“Yeah, thanks!  I think I’ll use it first to find all the bits that are hidden by the grass.  This will help a lot.”

Lawrence smiled.  I immediately began using the detector, starting at one edge and working forward.  In no time at all I found an iron rod, then what looked like part of an old plow and then the leg off of something.

“This is exactly what I needed and I didn’t even know I needed it,” I told Lawrence as I deposited my first finds in the pile.

Lawrence remained and talked to Virginia.  I think they both enjoyed the company.

One day began to flow into another.  Sooner or later, everyone stopped by and was presented with details on the community garden by my official greeter, Virginia, who was present more often than not when I was working.

One of the best parts was that Dad joined me all he could.  He had to work a lot and I know he was tired when he made it home, but, if at all possible, he was out there with me.  He seemed less sad when he was helping, too.

I missed Mom no less, but keeping busy helped me to not think about her so much.  It’s not that I wanted to forget her, but thinking about her hurt sometimes.  More than anything, I wanted her back.  I knew that wasn’t going to happen, but it was hard to let go of it.  Working helped me to focus on something else.

Finally, the day came when the lot was cleared of junk.  It was no longer an unsightly junkyard; merely an overgrown lot.

“Before you moved in, I never thought I’d see this day,” Virginia said.

“Now, I have to figure out how to mow it.  Our old push mower isn’t going to cut it.  Literally.”

“I might be able to help with that,” Lawrence said.  I raised an eyebrow.  “Give me a minute.”

Virginia and I looked at each other and shrugged as Lawrence took out his phone and made a call.  I could hear only his end of the conversation.  He was describing my plight to someone.

“Help is on the way, but it will take a while to arrive.”

I eyed him as he smiled.

I took out my notepad, sat at the table and sketched out ideas for the garden.  I had put a lot of thought into it, but this was the first time I tried to put anything on paper.

I drew in a series of rectangles for the beds I wanted to place along the sidewalk.  I was going to have to get rid of the grass somehow, which I feared would be a great deal of work.

I drew in circles and labeled them as fruit trees or rose bushes, the types to be figured out later.  I also put in circles to represent other things I wanted to plant, like blueberries and gooseberries, but soon grew frustrated.

“I’m no good at this,” I complained after I’d been at it more than half an hour.

“No good at what?” Virginia asked.

“Garden design.  How am I going to plan out how to use the whole lot.”

Virginia smiled.  “You don’t have to do it all at once, Dear.  Take it step by step, as you’ve already been doing.”

“I don’t think I’ll be able to take care of the whole thing properly, either.  I should have thought this out better.”

“You haven’t done it all by yourself so far, have you?  I’m sure others will help.  I must admit, I wouldn’t mind helping tend flowers.  I miss doing that.”

“I used to garden quite a lot, but gave it up when I had to begin using the wheelchair,” Lawrence said.

“A lot of people garden.  You’re creating a community garden, so allow the community to help you,” Virginia said.

“Here comes some of that help right now,” Lawrence said, pointing down the street.

I looked in the direction he pointed and spotted a tractor.  Before long, it pulled right into the yard.

“Hello, Ethan.  I’d like you to meet the young man in charge.  This is J.C.”

An older man in his fifties or sixties, but amazingly fit for his age smiled and held out his hand.

“I’m Ethan Selby.  Lawrence said you need help taming an overgrown lot.”

“It’s nice to meet you and I sure do.  All I have is a temperamental push mower.”

“The mower on the back of the old Ford will make short work of it.”

“I’ve gone over the entire lot with a metal detector Lawrence gave me and moved any bricks or rocks I found, so I don’t think there will be anything to hit, but I could have missed something.  I do want to leave some of the lot near the back as it is for habitat for whatever might live there.”

“How much?”

“About a fourth.”

“I’ll get right to it then.”

Ethan started up the old tractor, drove to the edge of the lot, lowered the mowing platform on the back and began.  In front of the tractor was an overgrown field, behind it was a level surface where I could begin work on the garden.  The scent of freshly mown grass filled the air.

I walked over and looked at the newly mowed ground.  The stubble of thick cut grass was so dense it was much like a carpet.  I could only imagine the mass of roots below.  How could I possibly plant in this?

“What’s wrong?” Lawrence asked as I walked back toward him where he sat in his chair near Virginia.

“Now that it’s cleared and mown; I can see what a heap of work it will be to get the ground ready for planting.  Everything that’s there will have to be removed.”

“Not necessarily everything, Dear,” Virginia said.  “As I began to get older, bending down to tend to my flowers became too difficult, so my husband built me a couple raised beds.  That was years ago, but I still use them.”

“Raised beds.  That’s a good idea.  Of course, I’ll need lumber and tools, not to mention help because I don’t know how to make them.”

“I have every tool you can imagine and can’t use any of them anymore.  You can come and get whatever you need,” Lawrence said.

“Awesome!  I’ll still need construction materials.”

“I bet if you ask around, you can find that, too,” Virginia said.  “How about a sign right here?”

“You are both full of good ideas!”

“That’s what old people are for,” Lawrence said.

“Who are you calling old?” Virginia asked.

“Me.  Of course, I didn’t mean you.  I would never refer to such a sweet young girl as old.”

Virginia laughed.

“Raised beds would make it a lot easier for anyone that doesn’t get around so well.  It might be good for kids, too.  I wonder if maybe it shouldn’t be mostly raised beds.  Spaced among them could be roses, blueberries, gooseberries, blackberries and raspberries.  Then, there could be a few areas of tilled ground for growing pumpkins, squashes and things like that,” I said.

“Make sure there is plenty of room around the beds, too.  You’ll want to mow around them and people will need room, especially if they are in a wheelchair,” Virginia said.

“Yeah, that’s right.  So, I can count on you helping with the garden if I put in raised beds?” I asked, looking back and forth between Lawrence and Virginia.

“I’d love to!” Virginia said.

“Well, the wife was the gardener, but I’m sure I can be of some use if you need me.”

“I’d appreciate the help.”

The smile on Lawrence’s face put one on my own.

“Okay, this design can go,” I said, sitting down at the table with my notebook and putting a big X through my previous attempt at garden design.  “We could put in beds right along the sidewalk as planned, but make them raised beds.  More of them could go maybe here, here, and here.  In these spaces as well, leaving room for other things.  Some dwarf fruit trees can go along the sidewalk as well, as long as they don’t shade the beds and then more in a little orchard, here.  A ground level bed for vining things like cucumbers could go here and here and here.  Yeah, I think something like this will work, don’t you?”

Lawrence and Virginia nodded after they checked out my rough plan.

“I’m sure I’ll change the plan plenty as I go, but this will give me a start.  “I guess the next step will be making the raised beds,” I said.

“Then you’d best make a sign,” Virginia said.

“I can use one of our big moving boxes.  I’ll be right back.”

I headed for the old garage, where most of our moving boxes were stacked in a heap.  I found a huge one that had been filled with blankets, then went in and raided my room for a black marker.  I returned to the table and soon I had, “Wanted Lumber for Making Raised Beds” on the side in huge letters.  I placed it where it could easily be seen and weighted it down with some of the old bricks I’d kept when clearing the lot.

Ethan finished more quickly than I expected.  Without him, my only option would have been to tackle the task with a weed eater.  I didn’t even want to think about how many days that would have taken.

“What do you think?  Did I leave too much at the back?  It’s no trouble to mow down more,” Ethan said.

“No, this is perfect.  Thank you so much!”

“It looks wonderful already,” Virginia said.

“The next project is raised beds, as soon as I get something to build them with,” I said.

“I’m sure there is scrap lumber in the barn.  Things like that tend to accumulate and our farm has been going for over a hundred and fifty years.  I’ll see what I can dig up,” Ethan said.

“Thanks so much!”

“I hear you’re new in town.”

“Yes, sir,” I said.

“It’s a long way off, but we have a Christmas party on the farm every year and everyone is invited.  You make sure you come.”

“I will, thank you.”

“I’m going to head back, but I’ll see what I can turn up.  It might be tomorrow, but I’m sure I can find something you can use.”

“Thank you so much!”

“You’re welcome.  I’m glad to help.  Thank you for what you’re doing.”

I grinned.

“Everyone is so nice here,” I said.

“Well, it’s not Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood, but people around here tend to be friendly,” Lawrence said.

I furrowed my brow.

“He’s referring to a kid’s show you’ve probably never seen,” Virginia explained.

“Oh, okay!”

I walked out onto the newly mown lot with my notebook, trying to visualize how the garden might look.  It was going to be a ton of work and take a long time, too, but soon I could make a start on the actual creation of the garden.  Mom would have loved this.

***

“I want you to take anything you think you can use,” Lawrence said as he rolled his wheelchair toward the garage.  “Don’t be shy.  I have no use for any of my tools anymore and no one to leave them to when I’m gone.  It will make me happy to know someone is using them.”

He pushed a button on the garage door opener and the door slowly opened.

“Oh wow.  Nice car.”

“That was my grandfather’s.  Back when I had a car, it had to sit outside because this took up the space.”

“What is it?”

“It’s a 1908 Model T.  It was one of the first made.”

“This is over a hundred years old!” I said.

Lawrence grinned.  “True enough.  It was the only car my grandfather ever owned.  It went to my dad when Grandfather died.  My parents used it as a second car and when they died, it passed to me.”

“Does it still run?”

“Oh yes.  I can’t drive it anymore, but I loan it out anytime there is a parade and take it to local car shows, with help, of course.”

“This is really cool.  Can I sit in it?”

“Sure.”

I climbed in and looked at the dashboard.

“It’s so simple.  There’s not much here,” I said.

“It’s tricky to drive until you learn how, but there’s not a lot to it.  This is from a time when a driver could easily fix his own car.”

“This is sweet,” I said, then climbed out.

“You can come see it any time you want.  Now, let’s pick out some tools.”

“Whoa, you have a lot of them.”

“Yes, too many.  Grab all three of those hammers.  Get those power drills, too.  The chargers are in the cases.  You’ll likely need a post hole digger.  There’s an ax and take all those shovels and hoes.  Oh, take those cans of nails and screws.  You’ll need them,” Lawrence said.

I carried things outside as Lawrence pointed them out.  I almost couldn’t believe all the tools he was giving me.  We kept at it for at least half an hour and probably longer.

When we walked outside at last, the area outside the garage looked like a tool sale.

“This is overwhelming.  Are you sure...”

“I used all this for years, but it’s useless to me now.  I know I could sell it, but I don’t need the money.  I’d much rather give it to you.  It will make me feel like I’ve contributed.”

“You sure have!  If I had to buy all this, even used, it would take who knows how long to earn the money.  Now, I can concentrate on the project.”

“Exactly.  I can’t help build the raised beds and will be of limited use when the garden is up and running, but I can contribute this.”

“I bet you can do plenty,” I said.

“I will do what I can.  I’m looking forward to helping.  Hopefully, I won’t be so bad at gardening that you’ll ban me.”

I laughed.  “I would never do that.”

“Now, you have a new problem; how to get all this home,” Lawrence said.

“I have it covered.  I sent a text out yesterday and school let out half an hour ago, so they should arrive any time.”

It was not long before Brody pulled up in an old Chevy pickup and pulled into the drive.  Mateo, Kai, Brody and Noah climbed out of the crowded cab.

“We have arrived!” Kai said.

“Like they wouldn’t have known that if you hadn’t told them,” Brody said.

“Shut it.”

“I’m sure you remember us, Lawrence, but we’re no longer part of a chain gang.  We did our time,” Mateo said.  I noticed his eyes strayed to me.  I couldn’t help but grin.

Smooth, J.C.  So, smooth.

Lawrence smiled.

“We have to load all this?” Noah asked.  “It looks like a hardware store exploded.”

“Does he always whine this much?” I asked the others.

“Always.”

“Oh, f... forget you guys!” Noah said.

The guys and I began loading the truck.  I helped Mateo lift the large garden tiller in the back, mostly so I could watch his muscles bulge.  He took most of the weight.  I almost think he could have lifted it himself.

With five of us, we made short work of the task.

“On to my house next,” I said.

“Would there happen to be any cookies around at your place now?” Kai asked.

“Yes.  I saved each of you a little bag of them.”

“Yes!”

I thanked Lawrence again, then climbed in the back of the truck.  I waved as Brody pulled out of the drive.

“Wait a minute!  Brody can’t possibly have a license.  When he said he could get a truck, I figured his dad had one.”

“This is his dad’s truck.  All will be well as long as we get it back before he gets home from work,” Mateo said, grinning impishly.

“Yeah, and as long as Chad doesn’t catch him driving,” Kai said.

“You guys live dangerously.”

“Danger is our business,” Noah said.

I was slightly uneasy riding in the back of a truck driven by an 8th grader, but he obviously knew how to drive and drove carefully, probably so he wouldn’t attract attention.  A couple of minutes later, he backed toward my garage.

“Whoa, what a trip.  I thought we’d never get here,” Noah said.

“I almost got lost,” Brody said.

“Has anyone ever told you guys that you’re weird?” I asked.

“No one who has lived to tell the tale,” Kai said, punching his fist into his hand.

“Well, I wouldn’t say it because you guys aren’t weird.  No, not weird at all!” I said, pretending to be intimidated.

I opened the garage and the guys helped me carry everything inside.

“Put it on the floor.  I’ll organize it after,” I said.

Soon, the garage was crowded with tools of every size and description.

“Need anything else while we’re here?” Mateo asked.

“No, I’m good.  Thank you so much, guys.  It was really cool of you to help.”

“Thank Mateo.  He threatened us with a beating if we didn’t,” Kai said.

“That was merely motivation,” Mateo said.

“We’re going to Ofarim’s, want to come?” Noah asked.

“No, I have to get all this put away before Dad comes home so he doesn’t run over it, but thanks.”

“I think he’s embarrassed to be seen with us,” Brody said.

“I know I’m embarrassed to be seen with you guys, but I’m getting used to it,” Mateo said.

“If you weren’t so big, I’d smack you,” Brody said.

“Well, I am, so don’t.  Later, J.C.”

“Yeah, later.”

“Bye, guys and thanks again.”

In moments, they were gone.  It was sure nice seeing them all again, especially Mateo.  I wished we could... but that was crazy.  A boy like him would never be interested in a boy like me.

I smiled as I walked into the garage.  I almost had friends.  I couldn’t exactly count Mateo, Brody, Kai and Noah as friends, but they were kind enough to help me out.  They’d helped me clear the lot as their community service, but that was over and they were still willing to help me transport all the tools Lawrence had given me.  I hoped we could truly become friends, but I’d make sure not to get involved in activities that might land me in trouble.  Dad would not be pleased if the police escorted me home, not one bit.

Most of the clutter from our move was already gone from the garage.  I’d already used a good many of our empty packing boxes to hold trash from the lot and now I exiled those that remained to create more room to work.

There was a large pegboard on one side of the garage and under it a long worktable with a shelf beneath.  Dad wasn’t the do-it-yourself kind of guy, so the space was largely empty.  I considered what organizing scheme to use and then began putting away tools, hanging those I could on the peg board and storing others on the shelf below the table.  I wanted everything to be visible at a glance, so I could find it when needed.  The last thing I wanted to do was waste time searching for tools.

Lawrence had certainly been generous.  He could have sold what he gave me for plenty of money, but instead he’d supplied me with every tool I’d likely need, including some Dad probably wouldn’t let me use if he wasn’t around, such as the circular saw.

One of my favorites was the basket of small gardening tools Lawrence had given me.  There was a trowel and three-pronged fork for digging and a pair of hand-pruners that doubled as a knife and a small saw.  There was a spool of heavy twine, nice garden gloves and more.  Lawrence said his wife had used it during her gardening days.  He wanted me to use it now.  I’d think of him whenever I did.

I worked steadily, but even so, it took me over two hours to organize and put everything away.  When I finished, I stood back and admired my handiwork.  I couldn’t wait for Dad to see.  I also couldn’t wait to get to work building raised beds.

I had the tools to create the beds and many to use for gardening.  What I needed now was lumber.  Enough had been dropped off that I might be able to build one raised bed, but where was I going to get the rest?  There was a lot more to creating this garden than I would have ever guessed when I started on the project.  It was probably a good thing I didn’t know.  Otherwise, I might never have started at all.

***

“Wow, now that’s purple,” I said, as I spotted a girl cutting across the lot, heading directly toward Noah and me.

“That’s Adriana.  I’ve known her since grade school.  She used to be Adrian.”

“What?” I asked confused.

“She’s trans.  I wouldn’t normally blurt that out about someone, but she has no problem with anyone knowing.  She’s very bold.  It took me a bit to get used to one of my friends changing from a boy to a girl, although really, she was always a girl, inside, you know what I mean?”

“I kinda get it.”

“Are you J.C.?” she asked when she reached us.

“Yep, that’s me.”

“I’m Adriana.  I heard you need some help building raised beds.  I’m also good at gardening.  I suppose Noah has already blabbed my life’s history.”

“Only the highlights,” Noah said.

“I do hope you’re not prejudiced,” Adriana said, staring me down.

“Not in the least.  I think everyone should be who they are, and, this is off topic, but I love your purple hair.  Purple is my favorite color.”

Adriana smiled.  I think she liked the fact that my focus was on her hair color and not that she was trans.  To be perfectly honest, I was more interested in her purple hair than the fact she was once stuck in a male body, although that must have been very difficult for her.

“He thought it was too out there,” Adriana said, giving Noah a shove.

“I think it’s really cool,” I said, and meant.

“It’s official.  I now like you better than Noah.”

“Hey, we’ve been friends for years!  You’re putting him ahead of me?”

“Maybe you can earn your way back to the top.”

“I doubt it.  I’m amazingly awesome,” I said.

“Fine, I show up to help, out of the goodness of my heart and this is the thanks I get,” Noah said.

“I do appreciate it, Noah.  Thank you very much.”

“I’m glad someone around here appreciates me.”

“You know I do,” Adriana said and gave Noah a hug.  “Now, quit pouting.”

“I do not pout!”

“He said while pouting,” Adriana said, then laughed.

A big farm truck stopped near us and then backed up into the yard.  Ethan climbed out of the driver’s side.  A handsome blond man and three good-looking teen boys with black hair stepped out of the cab, too.

“Who are they?” I asked.

“That’s Ethan’s significant other and their boys,” Adriana said.

“Maybe I should work on a farm if it makes you look like that,” I said.

“Hmm, there’s an idea,” Noah said.

“You guys are fine as you are,” Adriana said.  “Isn’t that what you said?  That everyone should be who they are?”

“Yeah, but I’d still like to look like that,” I said.

“I’m sorry, I couldn’t get here yesterday evening or earlier today, but things have been busy at the farm.  This is Nathan and this is Tom, T.K. and Trey,” Ethan said, pointing to the boys from the oldest, who looked to be a senior in high school, to the youngest, who was my age or a little younger.

“Nice to meet you,” Nathan said and shook my hand.

“Hey, I’m J.C.,” I said, nodding at the boys.

“We brought what I could find that might be of use.  I had a lot of seasoned oak that I didn’t bring because it’s so hard it’s impossible to drive a nail through it.”

“Wow, this is amazing!  Thanks so much!  I feel like I’ve won the lumber lottery,” I said, my eyes roving over the stacks of boards that filled the back of the large farm truck.

“It’s nice to get it out of the way.  Someone wants to keep everything,” Nathan said with a grin.

“I have no idea who Someone is, but he causes plenty of trouble on the farm,” Ethan said.

“He’s not me!” Trey said.

“No, Someone is much older,” Nathan said, giving Ethan a smile.

“I tossed the old fence posts in last so we can stack the wood on them.  That will keep the lumber off the ground,” Ethan said.

“This will help so much.  You’re awesome!” I said.

“We’re glad to help someone who is doing something to help others.  Let’s get this unloaded.”

Noah, Adriana and I grabbed gloves off one of the tables.  Ethan, Nathan and their boys had brought their own.  Ethan placed the thick wooden posts down and we began to stack lumber on them, sorting them by length.

Virginia arrived, or rather returned since she’d been here earlier, settled herself into a chair and observed.

With so many working, the big truck slowly emptied, while the stacks on the ground grew higher.

I wondered how Tom, T.K. and Trey were Ethan and Nathan’s boys.  They didn’t look anything like them.  I guess it didn’t matter.  I’d probably find out.  I knew very little about the people in Verona at present, except that all of them seemed nice and were definitely helpful.  It was almost as if I’d never left Laurel.

Dad arrived as we were taking the last boards out of the truck.

“I saw you circling the block until we were finished,” I said.

“I did not circle the block.  I waited down the street until the work was done,” Dad said, then grinned.  “Wow.  That is a lot of lumber.”

“If this isn’t enough, we have more.  This is all that would fit in the truck,” Ethan said.

“Thank you so much,” Dad said.

“We’re merely doing our part.  We’re too busy with the farm to donate much time, but we do have materials.  We actually have to get back.  Farm work is never done.  You’re going to stay, right, T.K.?” Ethan said, turning to the middle boy.

“Yeah.”

“T.K. is good at designing and building things,” Nathan said.

“Awesome!” I said.

“Call later when you need a ride,” Ethan said to T.K., then he and the others climbed back in the truck and departed.

“I’ll go change, then join you,” Dad said.

“I’ll believe it when I see you come back out,” I teased.

“You just moved here?” T.K. asked.

“Yeah, with my dad.”

“That’s okay, everyone ignore me like I’m not here,” Adriana said.

“Aww, I’m sorry,” T.K. said and then gave Adriana a hug.

“I’ll forgive you, this time.”

“She’s such a complainer.  I never mind if I don’t get noticed,” Noah said.

“That’s because it’s impossible not to notice you,” T.K. said.

“Hmm, that could be taken in a lot of ways.”

T.K. smiled.  Dang, there were so many handsome boys in Verona.

I felt a little left out.  Everyone knew everyone here, except me.

“I drew up designs for raised beds after Dad told me what you were doing,” T.K. said, pulling folded papers out of his pocket.  “I did one for raised beds that sit directly on the ground and another for beds that stand up on legs.  Either can be built in a lot of sizes.”

“This is great!” I said, looking at the designs.  I grabbed my notebook and showed it to the others.  “Now, this is rough, but here’s my plan for the garden so far.  Virginia made some suggestions for it.”

“That’s a well thought out design, although I don’t know anything about making a pond,” T.K. said, after examining my plan for a few minutes.

“That will come later anyway and it won’t be large.  I thought we’d start with the beds that will be along the sidewalk.   I’d like to make some the right height to use while standing, others for those in wheelchairs.”

“Keep in mind that us old people tend to be shorter,” Virginia said.

“What do you mean, ‘us’, you’re not old,” T.K. said.

“I am old by any definition,” Virginia said, but smiled.

“Sounds like fun, but we’ll need tools,” T.K. said.

“You have a weird sense of fun,” Noah said.

“I have plenty of tools, thanks to Lawrence, follow me,” I said and led the others, except Virginia who remained at her post as official greeter, to the garage.

“Dang,” Noah said.

“Wow, you do have plenty,” T.K. said as he began to gather various tools, including a level, a square, the circular saw and others.  “Grab those horses someone.”

“He’s so bossy,” Noah said.

“Do you know how to build raised beds?” T.K. asked.

“Sure.  It’s easy.  We cut boards and then we nail them together.”

“Don’t go into construction,” Adriana said, patting Noah’s shoulder.

“Hey, I bet I described exactly what we’ll do.”

“Yes, but you’re a little short on the details,” T.K. said, grabbing a tape measure.

“I’m a big picture guy,” Noah said.

“That means he’s full of crap,” Adriana told me.

“Let’s carry all this out by the lumber,” T.K. said.

Even with four of us, that simple task took two trips.  I had no idea it took so much stuff to build something.

“Dimensions?” T.K. said, looking at me.

“I hadn’t thought about that.”

“You’ll want them wide enough to provide plenty of room, but narrow enough it will be easy to reach the middle,” Virginia said.

“How about four feet wide?” T.K. asked.

“No one can reach that far!” Noah said.

“They only need to reach the middle, Noah,” Adriana said.

“Oh, yeah.  Right.  I knew that.”

“Of course, you did,” Adriana said, patting his back.  Noah glared, but I was certain he wasn’t truly angry.

“Four feet sounds good, or slightly narrower,” I said.

“We can make the outside dimension four feet,” T.K. said.  “For length, we should keep it to eight feet or under because I don’t think we have boards much longer than that.”

“Let’s do eight feet for as many as we can and then we can do shorter beds depending on the available lumber,” I said.

“We can get started with that.  You can figure out the height you want for the legs while I start on cutting boards to length.  I think we have everything we need to get started,” T.K. said.

“No, we don’t,” Noah said.

“I think we do,” I said, looking around.

“I think T.K. knows more about this than you, Noah,” Adriana said.

“What does he know?  He’s a musician,” Noah said.

“A musician?” I asked.

“I play the banjo.  I’m fairly good.”

“He’s won competitions.  He’s incredible,” Adriana said.

“He also takes classes at the music school,” Noah said.

“The one run by the lead singer of Phantom?  Do you know him?” I asked.

“Yeah, he’s really nice, and I’ve learned a lot there.”

“So, you don’t go to VHS then?”

“Yeah, I do.  Everyone at the music school attends regular classes at the high school.  Then, we focus on music on evenings and weekends.  My brothers accuse me of doing it to get out of farm work,” T.K. said, then grinned.

“How do you have time to help us now then?” I asked.

“I don’t have lessons all the time and I wanted to help.  Mind you, I won’t be able to do so often, but I thought I could help get you started.”

“Not until we get the one thing we’re missing,” Noah said.

“Okay, what are we missing, genius?” Adriana asked.  “We have lumber, tools, nails and screws.”

“How were you planning to run the power tools without electricity?” Noah asked.

“Oh, uh...”

“I guess I am a genius, or at least smarter than the rest of you,” Noah said airily.

“Oh, shut up,” T.K. said.

“I’ll run a power cord from the garage.  It’s a good thing I’m here or you three would be lost,” Noah said.

I worked out the height of the standing beds with Virginia’s help.  Lawrence arrived just in time to help me work out the height of beds that would be wheelchair accessible.  He was very pleased to see so many of his tools being used.

Dad came out and soon took over cutting boards because we needed T.K.’s help putting the beds together.  We drilled holes and secured the corners with screws, then began to add the legs made from 6x6 posts.  These went on the inside corners, which meant cutouts of just the right size had to be made for each when we finally began to put on the bottoms.  These planks were secured with lots of screws because they would have to hold a great deal of weight.

My dad wasn’t the handyman type of guy, so I was surprised that he knew quite a bit about building things.  I observed as he cut out the corners of a board so that it would fit around the legs.  When he placed it on the bottom of the bed, it fit perfectly.

“Where did you learn how to do that?” I asked.

“From your grandfather.  I haven’t done anything like this since I was young, but I haven’t forgotten.  Want to learn?”

“Yeah.  Are you guys okay without me?” I asked the others.

“Were you helping?  I didn’t notice,” Noah said.

I put my hands on my hips and glared at him, which made him laugh.

“You work with your dad.  We’ll handle this part,” T.K. said.

I did just that.  Dad showed me how to measure for the cutouts and how to keep it square.  It was the first time I could remember my dad doing anything like this with me.  I liked it, a lot.

It took nearly two hours, but we finished our first raised bed.  We stood back and admired it.

“Oh no!  We made a huge mistake!” Noah said.

“What?” T.K. asked, looking somewhat alarmed.

“We built it upside down!”

“I am going to smack you,” Adriana said.

“I believe we can turn it right side up,” I said.

“That was close!”

“I think I liked you better when you were kind of a jerk,” T.K. said.

“Me?  When was I ever a jerk?” Noah asked.

“This will take a while.  There was the time...”

“Never mind.”

“Okay guys, let’s see if we can lift this,” T.K. said.

“Can I help?” Chad asked as he walked up.

“Perfect timing, we need you,” Dad said.

We worked together, first moving the bed onto its side and then lifting it upright without putting any more pressure on the legs than necessary.

“We did make one mistake,” T.K. said.  “We should have built it closer to where it will sit.”

“We’ll do that for the next one,” Dad said.

The bed was very heavy, but with all of us working together, we were able to move it into place without too much difficulty.

Constructing the second raised bed took less time than the first and we built the third even faster, but by the time we finished the light was beginning to fail and it was time to quit for the day.

“Thanks everyone!  Now, it’s beginning to look like a community garden,” I said.

“Except there are no plants,” Noah said.

“I said, beginning.”

Noah smiled.

“I’ll call Dad to pick me up,” T.K. said.

“I’ll run you home.  It’s the least I can do.  Anyone else need a ride?” Dad asked.

“Thanks,” T.K. said.

“Well...” Noah started.

“You live four blocks away, Lazy.  Besides, you’re walking me home,” Adriana said.

“I am?”

“Yes.”

“I guess I don’t need a ride then.”

Everyone helped to put away the tools, and soon I was alone.  I ran my hand over the smooth edge of one of the beds.  I could already picture it filled with soil.  I couldn’t wait.

Mateo

Yes!  I returned from working out at the Graymoor Mansion gym to find the trailer deserted.  I hurried to my room, plopped on the bed and began rubbing the huge bulge in my shorts.  I was just about to push them down when I heard a knock on the outside door.

Damn it!

I rearranged my stuff to make my bulge less obvious as I walked to the front of the trailer.  I opened the door to find a teen girl two or three years older than me holding a baby.

“Is Agustin home?” she asked.

“No.  He had football practice and then...”

“Here.  This is his,” she said, shoving the baby into my arms and setting a bag beside me on the open doorway.  “He was fed half an hour ago.”

“Uh...”

“I tried, but I can’t take care of him.  It’s Agustin’s turn.  Tell him not to bother looking for me.  He won’t find me.”

“Uh...  Okay.”

The girl departed, leaving me holding the baby.  I looked down at him and he grinned at me.

“Fuck.”

I leaned over and grasped the bag, then closed the trailer door and carried the baby and bag to the couch.  I sat down and gazed at him.

“Hello, there.  I’m Mateo.”

The kid made gurgling noises in response.

Was this really happening, or was it a strange dream?  Things like this didn’t happen, did they?  Random girls didn’t shove babies into the arms of strangers.  This had to be a dream.  I ran through the events leading up to the knock on the trailer door—working out, coming home, getting ready to relieve the pressure in my nuts.   My balls still ached.  Nope.  I was awake and Agustin was in huge trouble.

“What are we going to do with you?” I asked the baby, hoping he didn’t start crying.  Babies did that a lot, didn’t they?  This one seemed content, for the moment anyway.

The door opened and Gabriel rushed in, but halted when he spotted me holding the kid.

“Where did you get that?” he asked.

“I picked it up at a yard sale.  Think Mom will like it?”

“No, really.”

“A girl dropped him off a few minutes ago.  She said to give him to Agustin.”

“Why?”

“Why do you think?”

“Uh...”

“Do you know where babies come from?”

“Yeah, a boy puts this thing in a girl and then later a baby comes out.”

“That’s pretty much it.  Agustin put his thing in a girl and now he has a baby.”

“He’s in trouble, isn’t he?”

“Oh yeah.”

“What’s his name?”

“She didn’t say.”

“What’s in the bag?”

“Look and see,” I said, hoping he’d stop asking questions.

“Diapers, baby wipes, bottles, baby food, baby formula, pacifier, toys, some papers...”

“Hand me the papers.”

Gabriel did and I sorted through them.  Immunization records from the county nurse, other papers I didn’t understand and a birth certificate.

“His name is Magnus,” I said.

“What kind of name is that?”

“I don’t know, but that’s what the birth certificate says, so that’s his name.  He’s about six months old.  His mother is Tiffany Soren and his father is Agustin Cruz.”

“I’m an uncle!” my little brother said.  “Hello, Magnus.  I’m your uncle Gabriel.”

Magnus began crying.

“Does that mean he doesn’t like me?”

“No, babies cry a lot.”

“Why?”

“They can’t talk, so they cry when they need something.  She said he’s been fed recently so...”

I slid my fingers in the diaper.  It was wet.  I was relieved because I did not want to deal with anything that came out the back side.

“He’s wet.”

“What are you going to do?”

“I’m going to change his diaper, if I can figure out how.  Hand me one.”

I examined the diaper.  After several moments, I thought I had it figured out.  I lowered myself to the floor, put Magnus on the couch and tore off his diaper.

“His penis is tiny,” Gabriel said.

“He’s a baby.  Hand me the baby wipes.”

I wiped everywhere that looked wet, then tried putting the diaper on.  I seemed to have it upside down at first, but I wasn’t sure.  I tried it the other way and after a couple of minutes, managed to get it on, more or less.

“Throw this away,” I said, holding out the diaper and wet wipe to Gabriel.

“No way!”

“Watch the baby then while I do.  Do not let him fall off the couch.”

“Can I hold him?”

“If you’re very careful.  Sit on the couch.”

Gabriel did so and I carefully placed the baby in his arms.

“Support his head, like this,” I said, placing his arms properly.  Gabriel looked at the baby and then grinned up at me.

“I’m holding a baby!  Can we keep him?”

“That will be up to Mom and Dad and Agustin.”

“I hope we can keep him.”

I put the diaper and wet wipe in the trash and then sat beside my brother and nephew.  I was an uncle.

Magnus grabbed Gabriel’s finger and gurgled.  My little brother made faces at him and the baby laughed.

I was still trying to come to grips with the sudden and unexpected delivery of the baby when Mom came home.  She stopped in her tracks when she spotted him.

“I’m an uncle!” Gabriel said.

Mom’s eyes immediately settled on me.

“Don’t look at me.  I had nothing to do with it,” I said, then handed her the birth certificate.  She shook her head in disbelief, then looked down at the baby in Gabriel’s arms.

“He’s adorable,” she said.

“His name is Magnus.  Isn’t he cool?  Can we keep him?”

Mom took the baby and immediately felt his diaper.

“I changed him a few minutes ago,” I said.

“Where did he come from?”

“A girl dropped him off and said to give him to Agustin.”

“This is just what we need.”

Mom’s expression didn’t match her words.  She smiled at the baby and then blew on his belly, which made him laugh.  Moments later, her eyes widened.

“I’m a grandmother.”  The idea seemed to shock her as much as the appearance of the baby.

The door opened a few minutes later and Dad stepped in.  He immediately noticed the baby because babies are hard to miss, especially when they are unexpected.

“What’s going on?” he asked.

“We’re grandparents.”

Dad’s head jerked in my direction.

“It wasn’t me; I swear.  The birth certificate proves it.”

Why did my parents think I’d knocked up a girl?  I didn’t even talk about girls, while Agustin had photos of swimsuit models on his wall.

“Agustin.  I’m going to beat him senseless,” Dad said.  I winced.

“No.  You calm down,” Mom said, trying to head off dad’s temper.  “We need to figure out what to do.”

Mom looked at Gabriel and me, then led Dad back into their bedroom and closed the door.  She took the baby with her.

“Agustin isn’t just in trouble, is he?  He’s in big trouble.” Gabriel said.

“Oh yeah.  Epic trouble.”

“Dad won’t hurt him, will he?”

I shrugged.  I truly didn’t know.  I hoped the situation didn’t turn ugly.

Mom and Dad began to get a little loud and then Mom called out for me to come and take the baby.  I did so and returned to the living room while the shouting began in the back of the trailer.  Magnus began to cry, but Gabriel grabbed one of his toys and soon had him smiling again.

Mom and Dad kept it up for several minutes and then their voices lowered.  Agustin stepped in the door with no clue that he was walking into a storm.

“What are you doing with a baby?” he asked me.

“Tiffany dropped him off,” I said.

Agustin’s face paled.

“What?”

“She left him for you.”

“But I... we...  Oh, fuck.  Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!”

Dad must have heard him come in because he came stomping up the hallway.  He backhanded Agustin before my brother had a chance to move.

“Pedro, stop it!” Mom said, coming up fast behind him.

“How could you be so irresponsible?” Dad shouted at Agustin, as my older brother cowered.

“I didn’t think... I thought I pulled out in time... It was just once and...”

“It was just once and now you have a kid.”

“I can’t take care of a baby!”

“You should have thought of that before you got that girl pregnant.  If you’d kept it in your pants, you wouldn’t have this problem!”

“I’m sorry, Dad,” Agustin said, looking like he might cry.

“Don’t you dare cry.  You man up, right now.  You got yourself into this and you’re going to face it like a man.”

“Pedro, he’s sixteen,” Mom said.

“If he’s old enough to knock a girl up, he’s old enough to face the consequences.  When I was sixteen, I was the sole support for my family.  Congratulations, Agustin, you’re a father and you will assume the duties of a father.”

“Yes, sir.  I will.”

Agustin walked over to me and gazed at his son.

“Hold him,” Mom said, taking the baby from me and placing him into my brother’s arms.  Agustin smiled at his kid and suddenly he seemed kinder than the brother I knew.

“His name is Magnus,” Mom said.

“Magnus.  That means great, doesn’t it?  I like it.  Hello, Magnus, I’m your dad.”

Agustin looked down at his son in wonder, as if he couldn’t quite believe he was real.  He almost looked like he was going to cry again, but for a different reason this time.

Agustin sat down on the couch and we all gathered around him.  Mom and Dad looked worried, overwhelmed and happy at the same time.

“We’ll need a crib,” Dad said.

“We’ll need a lot of things, but a crib most of all.  Why don’t you and Agustin go see if you can find one.”

My brother handed his son over to Mom and departed with Dad.  I felt for my older brother just then.  I was quite sure he was in for a dad talk, which could be quite unpleasant.

Mom smiled down at her grandson and sighed.

“I need to get supper on.”

“I’ll hold him, but if he needs a diaper change, count me out,” Gabriel said.

“Be sure to support his head,” Mom said.

“I know.  Mateo told me.”

I followed Mom across the small living room to the kitchen.

“Where are we going to keep him?” I asked.

“I hate to ask this of you, Mateo, but...”

“You want me to switch rooms and move in with Gabriel so the baby can stay with Agustin.”

“Yes, I’m sorry.  I know it’s a small room and you’ll be crowded, but the baby needs to be close to his father.”

“It’s okay.  I don’t mind rooming with the brat.”

“I heard that!”

“Will you be okay with sharing your room with Mateo?” Mom asked.

“You know, we have that little shed outside...” Gabriel said.

“I wouldn’t want you to move out there,” I said.

“I was thinking about you moving out there, but I’m the good son, so I won’t cause trouble.”

“How did you get to be the good son?” I asked.

“Think about it.”

My little brother had a point.

I wasn’t happy about switching rooms, but the alternative was sharing with Agustin and the baby and I wanted no part of that.  Poor Agustin.  He was screwed.

“I’ll go start moving my stuff,” I said.

“Your father can help you move your bed.”

I walked down the short hallway to my room.  I’d lived in this room most of my life, except for a few short years before the arrival of Gabriel when his present room was mine.  Now, I was moving back, but this time I had to share.

I didn’t have a lot of stuff, so it wasn’t that difficult to carry it all into Gabriel’s room next door.  There was plenty of room for my clothes in the closet and I got most of my stuff in the upper closet shelves that my little brother couldn’t reach.

Supper was ready by the time Dad and Agustin returned.  Dad was able to get a crib from a friend of his from work whose baby had recently outgrown it.  He also scored a few other baby items.

Supper was mac & cheese, peas, and chili corn.  The baby sat on the counter in a bassinet happily gurgling away.  Babies sure seemed to do a lot of gurgling.  My older brother looked very somber as we ate and kept looking over at the baby as if he couldn’t quite believe it was real and his.  I couldn’t blame him.  I was plenty shocked and I wasn’t the father.

“I think we have enough diapers for tonight and tomorrow.  I’ll pick some up after work tomorrow,” Mom said.  “I’ll teach you how to change a diaper, Agustin.  That’s going to be your responsibility.  I called Mrs. Hernandez and she said she can look after the baby during the day until school ends.”

He nodded.  I did not envy him.  Changing a wet diaper wasn’t so bad, but I didn’t even want to think about changing a dirty one.

“Agustin and I had a talk in the truck.  He’s going to start looking for work,” Dad said.

“He’s finishing school.  He’s not dropping out.”

“Of course, he’s finishing school, but it will be summer soon and he can work after school until then.  He’s also giving up football this fall so he can work.”

Agustin looked a little green, but kept a stony face.  That had to hurt.  Most of his identity was wrapped up in football and so was his status at school.  Now, it was gone, just like that.

“Are you sure he needs...” Mom began.

“Yes.  He has a child now and a responsibility to take care of him.”

“Dad is right.  I’m going to take care of him,” Agustin said with determination.

Dad gripped his shoulder.  “We’ll all help, won’t we.”

Gabriel and I nodded.

“I have my stuff mostly moved out.  I only need help with the bed,” I said.

Agustin looked at me.

“Mateo is moving in with Gabriel so the baby can stay with you,” Mom said.

Agustin looked at me with a deer in the headlights of a car expression.  His emotions were all over the place, which I guess made sense.

“Among his papers is a notarized statement from the mother giving Agustin custody of Magnus.  I feel for that poor girl.  She must have been overwhelmed.”

“She didn’t even tell me,” Agustin said.  “She lives with her mom in Plymouth and her mom is not much of a mom.  I would have helped if she’d given me a chance.  I wish I was here when she dropped Magnus off.”

“A baby must have been too much for her,” Mom said.

“She said not to try to find her and that you wouldn’t be able to do so,” I said.

The table grew silent for several moments.

“Well, I like being an uncle and I’m no longer the smallest around here,” Gabriel said.

“Don’t worry, we’ll still pick on you,” I said.

“I’m not worried about that!”

My life hadn’t changed as much as Agustin’s in the last couple of hours, but it had changed for the worse.  Crammed in with Gabriel, I had even less privacy than before.  Worse, I had to be careful about what I did and said.  I did my best to avoid getting caught masturbating by Agustin, but at least he understood how it was.  I’d have to use extra care that my little brother didn’t catch me.  I’d also have to watch my language more.  I had been demoted to the little kid’s room.

I wasn’t going to cry about it.  Life sucked sometimes and I’d survive.  Things could be much worse.

Dad and Agustin helped me move my bed and then I helped them get the crib in Agustin’s room.  Before bedtime, I entered my big brother’s room to look at my nephew and check on my brother.

“I royally fucked up, didn’t I?” Agustin said.

“That pretty much covers it.”

“Damn it.  We only fucked once.  Don’t be stupid like me, Mateo.  You can fuck up your life in an instant.”

I wanted to tell him I had no worries about knocking a girl up because I wasn’t into girls, but my brother was not known for being accepting.  He could be more accurately labeled a homophobe.

“I already have Dad to lecture me,” I said instead.

“Yeah.  Sorry.  It’s just that I didn’t think it would happen to me, you know?  Damn, I wish I’d had a condom with me, but...  There is no use in crying about it now.  The guys are going to be pissed when they find out I can’t play football.  My life at school is over.  I thought maybe I could get a football scholarship and go to college, but that’s out now.  I’ll be a manual laborer like Dad.”

My brother and I looked down into the crib.

“He sure is cute, isn’t he.”

“Must take after his mother,” I teased.

“Funny.  He does have her hair.  No one in our family has dark blond hair.”

“He has your eyes and features,” I said.

“I can’t believe I’ve got a kid.  Tiffany was my first.  We were both fifteen then and hooked up at a party.  I thought I was such a big man for scoring.  I was such an idiot.  I have to get some condoms.  What am I saying?  No girl will want to be involved with me now.  What fun is a guy who has to take care of his kid?”

I shrugged.

“How was your talk with Dad?”

“He didn’t yell or anything and he didn’t hit me again, but he laid it all out for me.  He told me what it means to be a father; putting myself second and sacrificing for my kid because he’s what’s important.  It’s weird, as furious as Dad is with me, we seem closer.  I’m going to do my best, too.  I’ve got to get a job, and fast.  There’s diapers, baby food, toys, doctor visits, clothing, shoes.  I’m going to need so much money and you know I’ll be working for minimum wage.  I’m so over my head.”

“I’m sure Mom and Dad will help.”

“Yeah, but ultimately, Magnus is my responsibility and I’m going to take care of him.”

I nodded, looked down at my nephew once more and then departed.

Gabriel talked too much before he fell asleep and I felt weird in the unfamiliar room.  Then, just when I began to nod off, I was awakened by the baby crying and the sound of both Agustin and Mom getting up to check on him.  It happened a few times before I fell asleep and I was awakened by the cries of Magnus more than once during the night.  The kid sure had strong lungs.

J.C.

“Eww.  Eww.  That is one big pile of crap,” Adriana said as Tom dumped a huge load of horse manure in the middle of the lot.

“It’s what makes gardens grow,” I said.

Adriana wrinkled her nose.

“You’re such a girl,” I said.

“Thank you.”

“I can already tell you’re going to volunteer to mix the manure into the beds.”

“I most certainly am not!”

Tom finished and drove the large truck up beside us.

“Thanks, and tell your dads thanks, too,” I said.

“No problem,” Tom said, smiled and drove off.

“Just look at it,” I said.

“I’m trying not to.”

“Come on.  It’s well-rotted manure.  It doesn’t even smell.”

“Well, I am not getting close enough to find out!”

“Fair enough.”

“We brought our wheelbarrows,” Jeremy said as he and Matt, two of our many neighbors, arrived.

“Just in time, too.  I’ll get ours and shovels.”

“You guys have fun.  I’m going to help with bed construction.  It’s less disgusting,” Adriana said.

I quickly retrieved the wheelbarrow, an ancient looking thing left behind by a previous occupant of our house, as well as shovels, then returned to where Matt and Jeremy waited.

“We need to mix the manure and topsoil, so why don’t we each take a bed so we don’t get confused,” I said.

“Sounds good,” Jeremy said.

The topsoil was courtesy of the Brewer-Westwood Christmas Tree Farm, where they were digging a new pond.  Adriana told me Mr. Brewer was a teacher and the football coach at VHS.  He might be one of my teachers in the fall, but there was no way I was playing football.  He had delivered lots of good topsoil yesterday and now we had the manure.

We began to fill the beds, one wheelbarrow at a time.  There were eight in place along the sidewalk and another parallel line four feet further into the lot.  They all needed to be filled.  I had waited for this moment and now it had arrived.

I suppose I was weird.  Not many boys would be this excited by dirt and manure, but I knew they would result in tomatoes, lettuce, zinnias, squash and so many other wonderful things.

Mom could get excited by stuff like this.  I smiled as I remembered a trip to a farm a couple of years ago.  Mom had borrowed a pickup from a friend of dad and taken me along to get a truckload of manure for her roses and flowerbeds.  She backed up to a huge pile of cow manure and we began to shovel it into the truck.  Mom did most of the work.  At twelve, I wasn’t even as big as I was now, but I did my best and Mom appreciated the help.  What I remembered now is the smile on her face as we drove home, it was as if the bed was filled with gold instead of crap.

The trip to the farm didn’t seem special that day.  It was merely one more time my mom dragged me along on one of her errands.  It never occurred to me then that my life would ever change.  I naively believed I’d always live with my parents in Laurel.  Oh, I had vague notions about high school and college and being grown up, but it was all so distant it didn’t seem real.  I could never have imagined then that only two years later I’d live somewhere else and that Mom would be gone.  That trip, which was practically meaningless at the time, now meant more than I can say.  I’d give anything to relive it, but at least I could remember it and how happy my mom was that day.

I mixed the soil and manure in my bed with a hoe.  Mom would be right out here with us if she was still alive, talking about all that would grow in the bed.  I was a lot like my mom.  It was almost as if she was inside me.  It was as if she wasn’t entirely gone because a part of her lived on in me.  Sometimes, I heard her voice when I spoke and especially when I sneezed.  Mom would never be entirely gone.  I knew she’d love this.

Marsha, Chad and their kids arrived.  Chad and Marsha pitched in to help, while Virginia kept the boys busy with lemonade and cookies.  Lawrence wheeled himself down the sidewalk.  When the twins spotted him, they ran over and pushed him the rest of way, while talking excitedly.

“What’s that about?” I asked Marsha.

“They love to hear stories about his sailing days.  When he was young, he worked on merchant ships and went all over Europe and the Caribbean.”

“I didn’t know that.  All I knew was that he was married a long time.”

“Decades, but this was before that.”

I gazed at Lawrence as I worked.  It was hard to imagine the eighty-something man sitting in the wheelchair as a young sailor.  I pictured old people as having always been old and never thought that long ago they were my age.  Would I someday be like Lawrence, an old man in a wheelchair?  I guess I might be if I lived that long.

I suppose thinking of old people as if they’d always been old was a lot like my twelve-year-old self thinking my life would continue on the same.  Even after the recent and massive changes in my life, it was hard to grasp the fact that nothing would ever stay the same for long.  Each part of my life felt like it would continue on and on, but that was far from the truth.  Everything would change, gradually or with astonishing swiftness.  These people I was with now.  This place I lived in.  Being with my dad.  None of it would last any more than a rose or a daffodil.  The blooms were there for a short time and then they were gone.  As hard as my life was now, I knew I needed to appreciate it, exactly as it was, here and now, because this time would never come again.

I pushed my wheelbarrow back for another load, sweating slightly from the exertion of my task, enjoying the moment as much as I could.  This moment might not seem like all that much, but soon it would be gone.  Someday, I might sit in a wheelchair like Lawrence and wish I was fourteen again, young and strong and able to push a wheelbarrow loaded down with dirt.  That thought made me appreciate even the toil.

Most days were like this one now.  Members of the community came and went, helping with whatever task was at hand, visiting, talking and laughing.  Virginia often brought cookies or sometimes muffins or special breads.  I made pitchers of tea and lemonade before I came out to begin my work.   I was seldom alone.  The mornings were the quietest, but soon enough one person would arrive, then another and another.  Afternoons could get downright busy and the evenings, which was after work for most, was the busiest of all.  I wasn’t lonely anymore, not even when I was alone before anyone arrived.  I’d started this project to occupy myself and feel closer to Mom, but I’d already gotten more out of it than I intended, and so had others.  My mom would be proud.

Later, after the light began to fail and everyone went home, I sat on one of the porch swings with Dad.  He drank coffee.  I drank iced tea.  We both gazed out over what was fast becoming an actual garden.

“I can’t believe the progress you’re making,” Dad said.

“Well, I have had a little help.”

“You’ve made our yard the community gathering place.”

“You don’t mind, do you?”

“Of course, not.  Your mom would have loved this.  If she had thought of it and we had the space, she would have done the same thing back in Laurel.  If she was here, she would be out there with you every day.”

“I feel like she is.”

“Maybe she is, at the very least she’s in you.  I see so much of her in you.  It’s as if she’s still with me.  I am so lucky to have you.”

I smiled.

“I’m lucky to have you,” I said.

“Well, that goes without saying,” Dad said.  I bumped his shoulder.

“The yard needs mowed soon, but it’s getting too dark and I’m too tired,” Dad said.

“I can mow it tomorrow.”

“You don’t have to do everything, Son.”

“I know, but I’m here and you’re at work.”

“You save that task for me.  Concentrate on your garden.  It will be time to plant very soon.”

“True enough.”

We grew quiet and could hear cicadas and the croaking of frogs, even here in town.

“Reminds me of Laurel,” Dad said.

“Yeah, it’s like the same town up north.”

“I won’t miss the humidity or the sweltering heat.”

“Me either.  You know it snows here?”

“That’s right.  You’ve never seen snow, have you?”

“Only in Christmas movies.  Virginia said it snows a lot here, day after day.”

“I’d better buy a snowblower before winter then.  I have no wish to shovel snow.”

“Yeah, but that’s months away.  I’m eager to see snow, but first comes the garden.”

Dad and I sat back as the swing slowly swung back and forth.  I wished Mom was with us, but I was sure glad Dad was here.

***

I browsed the Tuesday farmer’s market near the library looking for geraniums, which I should have done a couple weeks ago, but I’d been far too busy.  I had money from the sale of all the scrap, more than I’d expected.  Dad said he’d pay for the geraniums.  He’d given me a twenty for them and another for whatever I wanted to purchase.  Even so, I wasn’t going to spend it all at once and I could only carry so much.  I had brought along both of Mom’s trugs, which were long and shallow baskets made especially for gardeners, to tote all my purchases home.

My first purchase was a chive plant.  Mom always put chives on our hamburgers because it was better than onion.  The chives would return year after year, growing larger until I could divide them and make one into two plants, then more.

I purchased a sage plant next because a lot of people used it in cooking.  I bought a little flat of basil, too, with four plants in it.  Next came tomatoes; beefsteak, pineapple, sun gold cherry, pink Brandywine and a few others.  Finally, I spotted geraniums; white, pink and, yes, red.  I purchased six red, which pretty much filled the space left in my baskets.  That was enough for today, but I gazed longingly at the gooseberry, currant and blueberry bushes one vendor had on display.  Perhaps next week.

I went home to find Dad and several others building more raised beds and performing other tasks necessary to get the garden going.  The garden project had taken on a life of its own and continued even during my absence.

“Oh, how beautiful,” Virginia said, noting the geraniums.

“Mom always planted them.  I’m going to pot these and set them on the pot railing.  There are old pots in the garage.”

“I brought you some I no longer use too.  Your dad carried most of them over,” she said, pointing to stacks of pots in different sizes sitting by the trunk of the tree.

“Thank you!” I said and gave her a hug.

“It’s my little contribution, but mine isn’t the only one.  Laura Gregory left you seeds she didn’t use up last year.  They should still be good.  Jessica Strong brought several plants she dug up from her garden; chives, peppermint, lemon balm, black-eyed Susans and daisies.  She said she had plenty of each and can bring more if you like.”

“I guess I didn’t need to buy chives then, but we can use plenty.  I don’t think I’ve met her, have I?”

“No.  Her husband died unexpectedly last year and she hasn’t gotten out much.  I was glad to see her and encouraged her to return.  If she doesn’t, I’ll stop in and work on her.  It’s time she gets on with her life.  She could take a lesson from you and your dad.”

“I think doing something, anything, helps.  There’s a little part of me that thinks I should do nothing but sit and cry because my mom died, as if that would show her how much I loved her, but that’s plain stupid.  Mom knew I loved her.  I told her and I did things to show her.  I also know she wouldn’t want me to sit and cry.  She would want me to have as much fun as I can.  If it was the other way around, I know I’d want her to enjoy life and not spend it mourning because I was dead.”

“That’s exactly right.  I had a difficult time when Frank died.  I miss him every day, but I also try to enjoy my life as much as I can.  I know that’s what Frank would have wanted.  He told me, but I would have known regardless.”  Virginia laughed.  “Do you know what he also told me?  I probably shouldn’t tell you this and don’t you repeat it, but he said that after he was gone, I should get myself a hunky young boy toy.”

Virginia laughed again.

“So, did you?” I asked playfully.

Virginia swatted me.  “Heavens, no!  That was Frank, though.  He had a mischievous sense of humor.”

“I think I would have liked him.”

“He would certainly have liked you.  He was a wonderful man and I treasure the time we had together.  My time with him is over, but I have my memories and now I make the best of my life as it is now.”

“We’re a lot alike,” I said.

“Yes, but I only bake cookies.  You’re bringing together a lot of people.  Not a single thing has been planted yet, but you’ve already created a garden, a garden of companionship, kindness and love,” Virginia said, indicating all those working away.

“I think you underestimate your cookies,” I said.

Lawrence soon arrived, which meant I could perform the little ceremony I’d thought up on the way home from the farmer’s market.

“Can I have everyone’s attention for a moment?” I called out.  Everyone stopped working.  “I want to thank all of you for all you’ve done and now I want you to witness the planting of the very first plant in the garden.”

I picked up the chive plant I’d purchased and grabbed a trowel.

“Virginia, will you plant this please?” I asked.

Virginia looked slightly embarrassed, but also pleased.  She stood up, took the small pot and trowel, walked to the nearest raised bed and planted the chives as everyone watched.  Everyone, including me, clapped when she’d finished.

“Well, no one ever applauded all the years I planted things in my garden.  You’ve made an old lady very happy,” she said, smiling.

“You aren’t old, merely middle-aged,” I said as everyone got back to work.

“People do not live to be 150, J.C.  I’m old and happy to have made it so far.”

“I hope you keep going.  I don’t know if I could make it without your cookies and having you here is... like having a grandmother,” I said, hoping she wouldn’t be offended.

“Oh, J.C.  That is the nicest thing anyone has said to me in a long time.”

She hugged me and I hugged her back tightly, but not too tightly because I didn’t want to hurt her.  She was a grandmother to me.  I’d never known either of my own.

I walked over to where Dad was working and talking with some of the other dads of the neighborhood.

“Is it ready?” I asked.

“Yeah.  It wouldn’t start, so I ran to the hardware store for a new sparkplug.  I also put in fresh gas.  You’re all set.  Think you can handle it?”

“Hey, I’m an expert.”

“I seem to remember you taking out one of your mom’s daisies.”

“I was ten and it was my first time driving a tiller.”

“Oh yeah, that’s right,” Dad said, as if he didn’t know.

I shot him a fake glare and walked over to the tiller that Lawrence had given me.  It was a little difficult to push over to the area I’d selected for tomatoes, but I could handle it.

The space had already been cleared of grass.  Dad had rented a turf lifter and he and Chad had cleared not only an area for tomatoes, but smaller areas where I planned to place roses, fruit trees, gooseberries, currants, blueberries and other things that needed to go directly into the ground.  I had spent part of the following day covering the cleared places with cardboard weighed down with old bricks so that nothing would grow until I was ready to plant.  The one exception was the tomato plot.

The tiller started on the first pull.  I set it in place, pulled the lever and I was off, a little too quickly because it wanted to walk over the surface instead of dig into it at first.  I held it back long enough for it to get a hold and then began to till up the ground.  The scent of fresh earth filled my nostrils, bringing to mind another memory of my mom.

I was perhaps five and she was tilling up the garden in the spring.  I appointed myself the toad finder because I was concerned one might get in the way with unfortunate consequences.  There were a lot of toads in our garden, so it was a real possibility in my five-year-old mind.  Any toad would hop out of the way on its own at the approach of a noisy tiller, but that didn’t occur to me.  I saw it as my duty to ensure their safety.

I scanned the earth well ahead of the tiller and when I found a toad, I caught it and escorted it over by the small garden pond, where it would be safe.  By the time I finished, I had a little toad family there.

I laughed when I thought of something Mom had told me years later.  Once, when I was chasing down a toad, she heard me say, ‘Hold still, you little son of a bitch, I won’t hurt you.’  Mom was shocked and had no idea where I’d learned the words.  I couldn’t remember either by the time she told me the story.

Unlike our garden in Laurel, this ground had never been tilled, so it was rough going.  The tiller bounced a fair amount and it was a struggle to hold it back, but slowly I worked down to the end of the cleared area, turned and worked on tilling up a new strip.  It took me an hour to make the first pass over the plot.

After a short break for iced tea, a cookie and a walk around to see how other work was progressing, I returned for my second pass.  The second was far easier.  I went slowly to properly till up the ground, but even so I was finished in half the time.

I put the tiller away, cleaning off the tines first, then grabbed the trug filled with tomato plants and a trowel and carried it out to the section I’d just tilled up.

“Hey, mind if I help?”

I looked up into the eyes of Mateo and grinned, no doubt stupidly.

“Yeah, you sure can,” I said, far too dreamily and got so completely lost in Mateo’s eyes I stood there in silence.

“So, you’re planting tomatoes...” Mateo prompted.

“Uh, yeah,” I said, snapping out of it and hoping my brain would start to operate properly.  “Know how?”

“Yes, bury them deep, right up to the first set of leaves so they’ll form lots of roots, which should mean lots of tomatoes.”

“That’s right.  Where did you learn that?” I asked.

“Can you keep a secret?”

“Sure.”

“I mean it.  I don’t want anyone else to know, especially the guys at school.”

“I won’t tell anyone.”

“I know a lot about gardening and I mean a lot.  I LOVE gardening.”

“Awesome!  But that’s a secret?”

“Yeah, it’s not the kind of thing a jock is supposed to be into and I’m working hard to make the football team in the fall.  I’m not going to screw up my chance of playing in high school by letting the guys discover I’m into gardening.”

Mateo seemed completely earnest, but it seemed almost silly to me.

“I don’t really think anyone will care,” I said.

“You can’t tell anyone!”

“I said I wouldn’t and I won’t, but I think you’re worried about nothing.”

“Yeah?  It was a big deal at my old school.  I was on the 6th grade football team there.  I thought my love of gardening was no big deal, but when one of my teammates stayed over, I showed him my garden and asked if he wanted to help me plant pansies.  He called me a girl, went home early and the next day, all my teammates began calling me pansy.”

“What a bunch of jerks,” I said.

“It ruined everything.  I thought those guys were my friends, but they turned on me.  I ended up quitting the team and it was all because I let one boy find out I was into gardening.”

“That’s crazy.  I believe you because you’re obviously upset merely talking about it, but it’s almost unbelievable.”

“Yeah, I couldn’t believe all that happened either.  Hassling and ridiculing me for liking Pop Tarts would have made as much sense, but I couldn’t play football anymore because of it.”

“I’m sorry, but surely the same thing wouldn’t happen here.”

“I’m not taking any chances.  I want to play football and I’m not losing it again.”

“Your secret is safe with me.”

I felt like someone had dumped a bucket of cold water on me.  A boy who was in the closet about gardening sure wouldn’t be interested in another boy.  If he even found out I liked boys he probably wouldn’t want to be near me.  So much for my dreamy thoughts.

“You can indulge your passion for gardening here all you want under the guise of pitching in to help.   Look at all the others helping.  I doubt most of them are gardening enthusiasts.”

Mateo took in my dad and the neighbors, building raised beds and working on other projects and nodded.

“Thanks, J.C.  You’re a cool guy.”

“So are you, even now that I know your deep dark secret.”

Mateo grinned.

“Let’s plant some tomatoes,” I said.  “It will be as enjoyable as making a basket with a football.”

“Please tell me you’re trying to be funny.”

“What do you mean?” I asked, playing dumb.

“Your knowledge of football can’t be that limited.”

“Did I get it wrong?  Oh, you hit it with a bat, right?”

Mateo laughed.

“I don’t know if I could hang out with you if you were truly that clueless.”

“You kick it into a net?” I asked, as if I was sincerely perplexed.

“No!” Mateo said, but grinned.

“Well, I may not know much about football, but I bet you score lots of runs.”

“That’s baseball!”

“There’s a difference?”

“Oh, you did not just say that.  Football and baseball are completely different.”

“They seem the same to me.  You score with a ball in both, right?”

“Well, yeah.”

“See?  They are the same.”

Mateo groaned in frustration.

“Okay, I’ll stop now.”

“Good, you almost had me worried.”

“I’m not an expert and I don’t play, but I do know a reasonable amount about the game.”

“You should play.  It’s amazing!”

“I’m not the jock type.  I’m too smart for one thing.  Everyone knows jocks are dumb.  The more muscles, the dumber, so...” I said gazing at Mateo’s bulging biceps with a grin.

“Does it go in this way?” Mateo asked, holding a tomato plant upside down above the hole he’d just dug.

“No, then we’d have to dig to get to the tomatoes.”

“I’m not the smartest guy, but I promise I’m not that dumb,” Mateo said.

“I don’t really think jocks are dumb.  That’s nothing more than a stupid stereotype.  I’m truly not the jock type.  I’m not especially athletic and I’m not built like you.”

“You’d do fine.”

“Says the guy who can probably bench press me.”

“Football isn’t all about strength.”

“Says the guy whose shirtsleeves are about to rip because his biceps are so big.”

“Okay, I get it, but there really is more to football than strength.  It takes wits and the ability to make split-second decisions.”

“I think I’ll leave football to you.”

“You sure?  It’s so much fun!  I can’t wait to play again.”

“Yeah, I’ve seen players gasping for breath and covered in sweat as they run around a track for miles and miles.  That is not what I call fun.”

I needed to cool it.  I was talking about his muscles too much and he might ask why I was watching football players if I had no interest in playing.

“It can be a challenge, but it’s all part of the game.”

“You are hopeless,” I said.

Mateo nodded.  How could a boy be that cute?

I fought back a sigh.  At least I could be near him.  It’s not like I would’ve actually had a chance with him if he was gay and out anyway.  A boy that amazing and handsome could have anyone he wanted and I’d never be able to work up the nerve to make a move.

I could still dream.

“Okay, I’ll stop trying to recruit you.  It might be a mistake anyway.  You could be better than me and get my spot.”

“Not something I’d worry about if I were you,” I said.

“Hey, you plant tomatoes the same as me, creating a rim of earth around them so the water won’t run away,” Mateo said.

“Yeah, my mom taught me that.  She taught me pretty much everything about gardening.”

“I’ve taught my mom most of what she knows about growing things.  She’s good at a lot of things, but gardening, not so much.  I do most of the work.”

Mateo’s smile faded and he quickly turned to look at me.

“I’m sorry.  I’m being insensitive talking about my mom when yours is gone.”

“No, it’s cool.  I miss my mom a lot, but I like talking about her and I like hearing about yours.”

“I can’t imagine what it must be like for you.  I don’t know if I could handle it.”

“You would because you’d have no choice.  It’s hard, but I do my best.  I let myself feel sad when I feel sad, and I let myself feel happy, too.  I do worry about Dad, but he’s doing better now,” I said with a glance in his direction.  “Look at him, laughing with the other neighborhood dads.”

“They are probably telling dad jokes.”

“If that’s what they’re doing, I’m glad we can’t hear them.”

Mateo and I planted all the tomato plants I had on hand, then watered them in.  He definitely knew what he was doing.

“What’s next?” he asked.

Mateo remained until work stopped for the day.  I watched him walk away, hoping he would return to help again.  We obviously couldn’t be more than friends, but I thought we could be friends.  That would have to be good enough.  Besides, I’d never been more than friends with anyone, so nothing had changed.  The problem was that I wanted that part of my life to change.  I wanted someone special.  Maybe when school started in the fall, but that was months away.

Mateo

Yes!  Summer vacation at last!  I didn’t hate school, or even dislike it, but not going was much preferable to going.  I didn’t have to get up early and I didn’t have homework.  I was looking forward to trying out for the football team this fall, but I could wait.  I wanted and needed the summer to get myself in better shape.  I planned to lift weights, run and swim as much as I could.

I was awakened earlier than I wished on my first day of summer vacation by the cries of Magnus.  The kid was sure capable of volume.  When he cried out, everyone in the trailer could hear.

“Nooo,” mumbled Gabriel in his bed and covered his head with his pillow.

I climbed out of bed and checked the clock.  Eight a.m.  At least, I’d been able to sleep-in a while.  I’d normally be on my way to school now.

I heard Agustin quieting the baby in the room next door, and then passed him on my way to the bathroom.  He was wearing only boxer briefs and headed for the kitchen with Magnus, probably to warm his bottle.

The bathroom was mercifully free, but someone might show up at any moment so I quickly stripped off my underwear, checked myself out in the mirror for a moment and climbed into the shower.

Despite all my working out, Agustin was still better built than me.  His biceps were bigger, his chest broader and thicker and his abs more defined.  If he wasn’t my brother, the sight of him would have turned me on.  Truthfully, it still did, but he’d been a big enough dick to me through the years that I wasn’t interested in his dick.

Soaping up turned me on as it always did, but I ignored my tool.  I had plenty of physical activities planned for today and a low level of horniness would be useful.

I had just dried off and pulled my underwear back on when Mom knocked on the door.

“All yours,” I said.

One bathroom.  Six people.  It was not the best situation.  At least Magnus wouldn’t be knocking on the door for a while.  Our trailer was far too crowded.  My goal was to have my own place someday, a real house and not a trailer.  I had no idea how I’d bring that goal about, but it was nice to dream.  I’d have a garden, too, a big one.

I walked into the kitchen to find chaos.  Agustin was trying to feed Magnus and pack his lunch at the same time.

“I’m going to be late!” he said.

“I’ll feed him,” I said.

“Thanks, bro.”

Agustin was actually being nice and I decided not to question it.

I took the baby and held the bottle for him.  He sucked away on the nipple.

“I’m still going to be late by the time I drop Magnus off at daycare.”

“I can take him,” I said.

“Really?  You’d do that?”

“What can I say?  I’m a swell guy.”

“I really appreciate it.  I have to run.  Literally.  Thank you so much.  Goodbye, Magnus.  Daddy will see you this evening.”

Agustin kissed his son on the head and then bolted out the door.  My last sight was of him running down the drive toward the road.

Now I had the task of feeding the kid and making myself breakfast.  It’s amazingly difficult to get the twist tie off a loaf of bread with one hand.  I somehow managed it and pulled out two slices.

“Your brother left without Magnus?” Mom asked.

“I volunteered to drop him off at day care.”

“That was very thoughtful of you.”

“I want to go into town to work out anyway.  I was going to run, but I’ll walk.”

“Here, let me hold my grandson.”

“Thanks,” I said.

Poor Magnus kept getting passed off from one person to another.  He didn’t seem to mind.  He was more interested in his bottle than anything else.

I made much faster progress with my toast now that I could use both hands.  I spread on margarine and then popped the slices into the toaster oven.  While I waited, I pulled out the strawberry jelly and poured myself iced tea.

“When do you have to be at work?” I asked.

“I have half an hour before I need to leave.”

“Magnus is so cute.  Was I that cute when I was a baby?”

“Yes, you were and you’re handsome now.”

“Eh.  How could his mom give him up?  I can’t imagine anyone not wanting their baby.”

“She’s little more than a baby herself.”

“She’s two years older than me and I’m no baby.”

“You’ll aways be my baby.”

I groaned.

“What I mean is that she’s young and scared.  Think of what it would be like to be sixteen and responsible for a baby.  From what Agustin has told me, I’m pretty sure she was on her own.  Her parents didn’t support her the way we’re supporting Agustin.”

“I guess I can get that.  Agustin is really taking the responsibility seriously.  I know Dad lectured him, but he’s stepping up.”

“Yes, he is.  He acted very foolishly and thoughtlessly and, in some ways, has ruined his life, but I think he’ll be okay.  This may even be good for him in the long run.  You make sure you don’t get yourself in the same predicament.”

“Mom...”

“Don’t Mom me.  I love you, but you don’t always make good choices.  The police never had to bring Agustin home.”

I couldn’t argue with that.  I’d been carted home in a police cruiser a few times, all minor stuff, but still I had made bad choices.

“That won’t happen again and I won’t get myself in a spot like Agustin.”

I paused for a moment and considered telling Mom she didn’t have to worry about another surprise grandkid because I was gay, but Gabriel stumbled in rubbing his eyes.

I wondered what Mom thought of living with so many guys who often walked around in their underwear.  We thought nothing of it.  I bet she wished one of her sons was a daughter.

My little brother began fixing his own breakfast.  Mom prepared supper, but we were on our own for breakfast and lunch.  She worked a lot and we were all capable.  My brother was eight, but responsible enough he could stay home alone.  Everyone looked out for each other in the trailer park, so if he needed help there was always someone nearby.  This trailer park was a lot better than our old one.

By the time I finished eating, Magnus was fed and burped.  Mom dressed him in one of the little outfits she’d found in the resale store.  I grabbed my backpack and then set out carrying my nephew, who was disguised as Winnie the Pooh.

Magnus was kind of heavy to carry for such a distance, but I thought of it as working out.  I never thought that someday I’d be walking into town carrying a baby.  I wonder what I would have thought if I’d received a glimpse of the future and had viewed myself just now.  One thing I wouldn’t have thought was that the kid was mine.  I truly wasn’t interested in girls.  The baby in my arms was evidence that being gay could definitely be a good thing.  I’d never have to worry about anyone dropping off a kid for me.

I thought about Mom’s warning not to make the same mistake as my brother.  She had no clue that her middle son was a homo.  I guess it didn’t surprise me.  I didn’t fit any of the stereotypes.  I was so unlike what I’d thought gay guys were supposed to be like I questioned whether I was one at first, but over time it became more and more clear that I liked dick and sexy male bodies.  I wished I could be open about who I was, but I was too scared to even let the guys from school know I was into gardening.

“What will you think someday when you find out you have a gay uncle?” I asked Magnus as I gazed down at him.

He stuck out his tongue and gurgled.

“Don’t tell me you’re like your dad.  You need to be nicer than him.”

Magnus responded by squealing then smiling.

“I agree,” I said.

Our trailer park was just on the edge of town, so it didn’t take me long to reach it.  After a few minutes I passed the Potter-Bailey Gay Youth Center and, as always, wondered what it was like inside.  I had always been too much of a coward to go in or even gaze at it for too long.

“Maybe you shouldn’t grow up to be like your Uncle Mateo, either.  You don’t want to be afraid to be who you truly are.”

“What do we have here?”

I looked up, wondering if Kai had heard me, but he gave no indication he did.

“You never know what you’ll find at the side of the road.  It’s amazing what people throw out.”

“Is that your brother’s kid?”

“Yep, meet my nephew, Magnus.”

“He’s a lot cuter than you.”

“He has an unfair advantage.  Everyone loves babies until they have to change a diaper.”

“I want no part of that.”

“That’s one of the downsides.  Another is him screaming his head off at all hours and waking me up.”

“You should trade him in for a dog.”

“Can’t.  Mom is already attached.”

“Why are you carrying him around?”

“Agustin was going to be late for work and I was heading to the gym anyway, so I’m dropping him at day care.”

“You’re such an awesome guy.”

“I am, aren’t I?”

“No comment.  I think I’ll spread the rumor he’s your kid.”

“Too late.  Everyone in town knows he’s my brother’s.”

“Don’t they though?  That’s all anyone talked about at school.”

“Yet another reason to be glad it’s over.”

“Well, have fun tormenting yourself in the gym.”

“Oh, I will.  You should try it.”

“No thanks.  I’m too hot for my own good already.”

“You keep telling yourself that, buddy,” I said.

I completed my journey to the day care center and bid my nephew ‘goodbye.’

I considered heading straight to the community garden, but I didn’t want to appear too eager.  I also wanted to get my workout in while I was fresh so I could get the most out of it.  I’d lift, then swim and then I’d head for J.C.’s garden.

I thought about J.C. as I lifted.  I definitely had a crush on him.  He was seriously cute and sexy.  I wondered what it would be like to kiss him and go out on a date with him.  I wanted that.  I wanted J.C. as a boyfriend.

Like that’s gonna happen.   You can’t even come out of the gardening closet.  Why are you such a pussy?

I put it out of my mind and focused on lifting.

After a quick shower, I changed into my swimsuit and climbed into the pool.  Skye was doing maintenance right in the pool and he was wearing only a skimpy swimsuit.  The sight gave me an instant stiffy.  He was most certainly a DILF and I wanted him to be my daddy.

What would it be like, dating an older guy like Skye?  I’d be willing to give it a try, only I really liked J.C.  It’s not like I had a chance with a guy like Skye.  He was gay, everyone knew it, but there was no way he’d want a closet case like me.  My age was also a drawback and I simply wasn’t hot enough.  I was not in Skye’s league.

Dating Skye was out, but I could still fantasize about him.  From the bulge in his swim trunks, it was obvious he was hung, but I didn’t let my thoughts go further.  If I did, I’d have such a bulge I wouldn’t be able to get out of the pool for fear someone would notice it.  I’d save the fantasizing for later and enjoy the luxury of the pool now.

I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for Skye.   I’d actually thought that maybe he gave me the membership so he could hit on me, but that was more wishful thinking than anything else.  I think he truly wanted to encourage my interest in weightlifting.  The cost of a membership wasn’t especially high, but it was a luxury my family could not afford.

I thought about the contrast between the luxury of Graymoor Mansion and the poverty of Graymoor Estates.  It’s not as if those of us in the trailer park lived in squalor.  Everyone who lived there tried to maintain their trailer and make things look as nice as we could, but none of us had a lot of cash and it was obvious that it was a place for the less fortunate.

I floated on the surface of the clear blue water and gazed at the blue sky and the occasional cloud that floated overhead.  The sun was shining and even glinted off the water.  I was surrounded by enormous lush plants and statues of nude youths I’d want to hook up with if they were real.  Just outside, red roses were beginning to bloom.  Part of the luxury was the large open space.  There were a few others in and around the pool, but not many and the space was so vast I almost felt as if I was alone.  Six of us lived in the trailer now with the addition of Magnus.  There were too many people and not enough space.  Here, was the luxury of space and I reveled in it while I could.  I was a trailer park kid visiting a five-star world.

I hit the hot tub for a few minutes after the pool.  The hot bubbling water felt so good, but it wasn’t wise to remain in long.  I didn’t want to become the main ingredient for Mateo soup.

I showered again and resisted the urge to stroke.  I was alone in the showers, unfortunately, and soon finished.  I dried off, dressed and headed for the garden J.C. was creating, and, more importantly, J.C.

Yep.  Summer vacation beat school and being outside beat being stuck in the trailer.

I thought of my brother as I walked.  He was outside now, too, but doing yard work.  While I was free to do what I wanted, he was stuck working.  There was a time when I didn’t want to be attracted to boys.  I thought of it as a curse and didn’t understand why I’d been cursed.  My thinking had changed some time ago on that, but my brother’s predicament was evidence that there were advantages.  I never had to worry about getting anyone pregnant.

There he was, working alongside my bud Noah and hot, hot Ethan Selby.  J.C.  Verona’s most perfect boy.  Noah wasn’t bad either and I’d had a lot of fun with him.  Ethan was another DILF who could be my daddy any day.  Damn, he was built.  J.C. was something special, something more.  He didn’t have Ethan’s muscles, but he's the one I wanted, and for more than sex.

“There you are, finally!  I thought you changed your mind and weren’t coming today,” Noah said.

“Hey, I have things to do, you know.  I took Magnus to day care and then I worked out.”

“You can get a workout here.”

“It’s not the same.  Hey, J.C.  Need help?”

“Always.  Thanks for coming.”

We stood grinning at each other.  Was he interested in me like I was in him?  I certainly hoped so, but didn’t trust my judgement.  Noah looked back and forth between us and rolled his eyes.

“We’re building compost bins...” Noah prompted.

“Yeah, that’s what we’re doing,” J.C. said.

“That’s a great idea.  I don’t have room for anything like that at home.  Compost is the best for a garden.”

Noah gazed at me as if he didn’t quite know me.  Perhaps I was a little too enthusiastic, but why should I hide my love for gardening from Noah?  We’d hooked up.  If he could keep that secret, he could surely keep my gardening secret, too.  I’d give it some thought.

“We’re going to build two sets of three large bins.  Everything goes in the first bin, then after it’s composed a few weeks, we move it to the second and start new compost in the first.  Finally, it gets moved to the last bin.  When it’s ready, we can spread it wherever it’s needed,” J.C. explained.

I did not say that it was my dream to have a compost bin.  I guess I should say it was one of my dreams, along with a garden shed and way more room for gardening.  I knew it was weird for a guy my age to be excited about gardening, but I couldn’t help it.  That was a part of my attraction to J.C.  His attachment to gardening was largely because of his mom, but I could tell he possessed his own love of making plants grow.  He was perfect.

“Let’s do it,” I said.

“Our next task is creating a concrete block foundation to keep the bin itself from turning into compost.  Noah and I have already leveled the space.  Now, we need to carry the blocks from the stack over there,” J.C. said, pointing across the garden.

“Hey, I remember packing a lot of those out of this lot,” I said.

“Yes, and now you get to pack them back,” Noah said.

The three of us began our task.  I was thankful for the gloves J.C. handed me.  Concrete was rough on the hands.

“Why don’t you two work on the foundation and I’ll carry the blocks over,” I suggested after a couple of trips.

“You sure?” J.C. asked.

“Yeah.”

“Let him.  He’s the one with the muscles,” Noah said.

J.C.’s eyes drifted to my biceps.  I resisted the urge to flex.

“Okay, cool.”

I didn’t mind the work, but I wanted to spend more time with J.C.  The opportunity came when Noah had to depart.  His aunt was arriving from New York and his mom wanted him home.  Tough luck for Noah.  Good luck for me.

“It’s really cool you came to help when you’re not...”

“Being forced at gunpoint to be here?”

“I don’t recall seeing a gun,” J.C. said.

“That’s because the sniper was on your roof, ready to take any of us out if we tried to leave.”

“I definitely missed that.”

“I think you’re doing something cool here.  I like to garden and since everyone is helping, I don’t stand out.  If any of the guys see me, they won’t think anything about it.  I could even claim I’m being forced.”

“Sniper?”

“No.  Parents.  That’s more believable.  I’ll let you in on a secret.  I made the sniper up.”

“Seriously?  I totally fell for that!” J.C. said, rather convincingly.

I laughed.

“What’s it like suddenly having a nephew?” J.C. asked.

“Weird, but what was weirder was when his mom dropped him off.  I was in the tr... I was home alone and this girl shows up and hands me a baby.”

“That would be a surprise.”

“I’ll say, but my brother was even more surprised.”

“He didn’t know anything about the baby?”

“Well, he knew he’d done what it takes to make one, but he had no idea he was a dad.  Magnus’s mom didn’t tell him.”

“Dang.  Your poor brother.”

“Yeah, it’s derailed his life.  Dad told him he can’t play football this fall because he’ll have to work.”

“I guess he’s bummed about that?”

“Majorly.”

“You are so lucky to have a brother and a nephew.  I always wanted a brother and a little nephew would be so cool.”

“I have two brothers actually.  Gabriel is eight.”

“How old is...”

“Agustin.  He’s sixteen.”

“Dang, and he has a kid!”

“Yeah, the parents were not happy.  I was the bad kid, but not anymore.  My brother has stepped up, though.  He’s accepted responsibility for his kid.  I figured he’d throw a fit about football because that’s his entire identity at school, but he didn’t.   He really cares about Magnus too and Mom is wild over having a grandson.”

“If she’s that happy, maybe you should give her another one.”

“Are you trying to get me killed?  Besides, that’s not really my thing.”

I gazed at J.C., wondering if I’d told him too much, wanting to tell him I was gay and into him.  J.C. gazed at me a moment, but didn’t comment.  I wondered what he was thinking.

“I think you’re lucky you don’t have brothers.  Gabriel is great, mostly, but Agustin has always pushed me around and tormented me.  I don’t mean anything horrible, but he’s kind of a jerk.  He does seem nicer now.  Maybe he’s in shock.”

“Yeah, discovering you have a kid is not the kind of surprise a guy wants.”

“I’ll say.”

We worked while we talked.  I also stole looks at J.C.  I wanted to run my fingers through his dark red hair and kiss his red lips.  Why was I so into him?  Noah and I had messed around a few times, but I didn’t dream about kissing him and being with him.  Why was I so stuck on J.C.?  Yeah, he liked to garden, but that couldn’t be it.  I loved that about him, but when I looked at him, I wasn’t thinking about gardening.

“Lunchtime,” J.C. announced, what seemed like a few minutes later, but it was 10:30 when I left the Graymoor Mansion.

“Already?” I asked.

“Yeah, it’s getting close to one and I’m starving.  I usually eat earlier, but I was too wrapped up in what we’re doing to notice time slipping by.”

The same was true for me.  I had no idea that much time had passed.  I would have guessed twenty minutes.  Time passed too quickly when I was around J.C.  My stomach rumbled.

“I’ll head home, grab something to eat, then come back,” I said.

“There’s no need to do that.  Come in and I’ll fix us both lunch.  I make a mean toasted cheese.”

“I don’t want to mooch off you.”

“You aren’t.  You could say I’m mooching labor off you.”

“Yeah, but I want to be here.”

“I want to fix you lunch.  Come on.”

I let J.C. pull me toward the house.  I very much wanted to spend more time with him, but I was always self-conscious about my family’s limited means and didn’t want anyone to think I was taking advantage.

“Nice geraniums,” I said as we crossed the porch.

“I got those at the farmer’s market.  Mom always had geraniums.  They remind me of her.”

“I get my mom a couple every spring for our porch, too.”

“We’re both brilliant!”

I laughed.

“Cool house,” I said as we entered.

“Verona seems to be filled with big old houses.  Virginia said its twin stood on the lot where we’re putting the garden.  Yours is probably much the same.”

“I wouldn’t say that.”

J.C. led me into a large kitchen with plenty of sunlight coming through the windows.  I wished we had this much space.  J.C. was so lucky.

“Have a seat.”

I sat at the old kitchen table while J.C. got to work.

“The secret to my astonishing grilled cheese, and don’t you dare reveal it to anyone, is lightly buttering the outside before toasting.  You have to use real butter, too, not that fake stuff.”

“You sure you want to tell me this?  How do you know I’m not a spy out to discover all your kitchen secrets?”

“You look trustworthy enough and I have ways to take care of those who defy me, such as a fresh bouquet of poison ivy.”

I grinned.  J.C. was a little weird and I liked it.

“The next secret is using Cabot seriously sharp cheddar cheese.”

I nodded, although at home we only had individually wrapped American cheese.

J.C. placed his creation in a toaster oven and turned it on.

“Iced tea okay?”

“Sounds great.”

J.C. poured us both glasses and then got out a bag of Cool Ranch Doritos.  We only had plain old potato chips in the trailer.

A delicious aroma filled the kitchen.  Soon, but not soon enough, J.C. pulled the toasted cheese out of the toaster oven and assembled the sandwiches.

“It’s also extremely important to cut the sandwiches diagonally.”

“What happens if they are cut straight across?”

“Total chaos,” J.C. said with complete seriousness.

J.C. presented me with my sandwich and then sat.  We each put a handful of Doritos on our plate.

“I forgot to mention that the Doritos eaten with toasted cheese must be cool ranch and never, ever any other kind,” he said.

“Chaos?” I asked.

“Utter disaster.”

“You’re weird enough to fit in with my buds,” I said.

“Thank you.  I do like Noah, and you, of course.”

“The guys are cool, but they sometimes make poor choices.”

“That would explain the sheriff’s van and the community service.”

“Yeah, and I made the mistake of going along with them, but no more.  This is the best toasted cheese I’ve ever tasted.”

“Told you!  I learned it from Mom and she learned it from her mom, who I never met, unfortunately.”

“That sucks.”

“Yeah, I never met any of my grandparents.  They’re all dead.”

“I have one grandmother, but she doesn’t live close.”

As we sat there, I tried to work up the courage to tell J.C. I was gay and that I liked him.  I managed to get fairly close, but then wondered if I was making a mistake.  My brother had chilled out some, but he was still a homophobe.  I’d heard him go on about ‘faggots’ and ‘fairies’ enough to know he would not react well if he found out I liked dick.  I had a history of making bad choices, so I kept my mouth shut about my sexual orientation while we ate.  My decision was probably the right one, but still made me sad.

“For dessert we have Virginia’s chocolate chip cookies,” J.C. said.

“Oh, I love those!”

“Then, knock yourself out.”

I smiled at J.C. as we finished our sandwiches, munched on cookies and drank iced tea.  I was perfectly content in this moment.  If only it could last forever.

J.C.

“When you said Mrs. Strong was a widow, I pictured her your age,” I said as I sat between Virginia and Lawrence, taking a short break.

“She’s closer to half my age.”

“Oh, she looks older than fifteen to me,” Lawrence said.

“If you think I’m thirty, you must have cataracts, Lawrence,” Virginia said, making him laugh.

“She seems to like Dad an awful lot,” I said as I watched the pair planting the black-eyed Susans she had brought over from her own garden.

“They do seem to get along well,” Virginia said.

Dad was laughing.  I don’t know what Mrs. Strong had said, but I wasn’t sure I’d seen him laugh since Mom died.  I was glad to see him happy, but I didn’t know how I felt about him getting friendly with the not-so-old widow.

“I need to get back to work,” I said.

I walked out to the area I’d selected for fruit trees.  I’d used money from the sale of scrap, combined with more provided by Dad to purchase a few bare-root fruit trees from Stark Brothers.  I had two Red Haven peach trees and two Fuji apple trees that had arrived today and were currently sitting in a bucket of water.

I began digging a hole for the first tree.  All too soon, the digging was made harder when I encountered roots.  I began to sweat and was glad I was dressed in shorts and a loose tee-shirt.

I eyed my dad and Mrs. Strong as I worked.  She paid a little too much attention to Dad.  I wasn’t sure I liked that, but I wanted him to be happy.  Nothing was ever simple.

I kept digging until I had a rough circle, but I wasn’t done.  It had to be deeper.

“What are you doing now?” Adriana asked as she approached.

“How many guesses will you need?”

She smacked me.

“Oww.”

“I can see you’re digging a hole, but why?”

“For a peach tree.”

“Oh, I love peaches.   I’ll help.”

“You may be sorry you offered.  I need to dig four holes.  Do you want to start another?”

“Sure.”

I walked several feet away to the next space I’d selected for a tree and pointed to the X painted on the ground.

“We’ll plant another tree right here,” I said.

“Why so far away?”

“Because the trees will get big.  The Red Havens I’m planting are semi-dwarf, but they will still grow twelve to fifteen feet tall and also that wide.  They need to be about twelve to fifteen feet apart.”

“I guess you do know what you’re doing.”

“Always.”

Adriana began digging a hole while I continued with mine.  I kept an eye on my dad and the widow as I worked.  Adriana noticed me watching them, but didn’t comment.

I grinned when I saw Mateo approach.  Adriana noted that, too.

“Hey, sorry I’m so late, but I promised Mom I’d help her before coming.  What are you doing?”

“Planting fruit trees.”

“I see.  He gets a direct answer.  I get ridiculed,” Adriana said.

“That’s pretty much it,” I said.

“Why do I like you again?”

“Well... I’m witty, charming, funny... um.”

“Don’t forget handsome,” Mateo said.

I glanced at him for a moment and he smiled.

“Yeah, that.  Handsome.  Intelligent, entertaining...”

“You can stop now,” Adriana said.

“I hate to tell you this, but you’re doing it wrong,” Mateo said.

“I’m complimenting myself wrong?  Is there a better way?”

“You’re doing a stellar job of complimenting yourself,” Adriana said.

“I mean the holes you’re digging.  They should be square.”

“They should?” I asked.

“Yes.  If the hole is round, the roots tend to go around and around in the hole.  If it’s square, they don’t have an easy path to follow so they grow out.”

“Oh!”

“Don’t know everything about gardening, do you, J.C.?” Adriana said.

“Be quiet you,” I said, making her laugh.  “Mom planted fruit trees when I was too young to help so I didn’t learn about that.”

“Also, do not put any compost in the hole.  It should go on top.  Otherwise, the roots will stay in the hole instead of growing out and down.  You don’t happen to have any mycorrhizal fungi, do you?”

“I’m sorry.  I ate mine just before you got here.  If I’d known you wanted some, I would have saved you a bite,” Adriana said.

“How do you put up with her?” Mateo asked.

“I keep her around because she’s pretty and has purple hair.”

“The only reason I am not smacking you is because you said I’m pretty.”

“I meant it, too,” I said.  Adriana smiled.

“What is micro... whatever fungi?” I asked.

“It’s a fungus that works with the roots of trees and other plants and helps them draw in nutrients.  There is a network of it underground.  All these trees you see around us are interconnected through their roots and the mycorrhizal network.  They talk to each other and help each other out.”

“Um, Mateo.  Don’t take this the wrong way, but do you spend a lot of time in the sun, enough to cook your brain?” Adriana said.

“It’s true.  Look it up if you don’t believe me.”

“How do you know this stuff?” she asked.

“I read these things called books.  You should try it sometime.”

“Hey!  Stop being smart.  You’re a jock.  It’s not allowed!” Adriana said.

“Sorry, I do not play by the rules.”

“Well, I’m sorry too, but you do not get to look like that and be intelligent as well.”

I raised my eyebrow.  I wasn’t sure, but I think Adriana blushed.  So she was into Mateo, too.  At least she had a chance with him, unless he was a transphobe, which I doubted.

“Anyway, I have some at home,” Mateo said.

“You have this fungi at home?” I asked.

“Yes.  I’ll run home and get it.  Don’t plant before I return.  I won’t be long.”

“Why would you have something like that?” Adriana asked.

“It was left over from when they planted trees in the tra... in the park.  No one wanted it so I took it.”

“I’m surprised there wasn’t a huge fight over it.  Everyone dreams of owning fungi,” Adriana said.

Mateo stuck out his tongue and took off running.

“He has fungi at home?  Does he collect it or something?  He’s sexy, but strange,” Adriana said when he’d gone.

“You think he’s sexy, huh?”

“I’m not the only one,” Adriana said, pointedly.  “You can’t keep your eyes off him.”

“Uh...”

“It’s okay if you like boys, J.C.,” Adriana said.

I felt distinctly uncomfortable.  I had never talked about this with anyone before.

“It is okay, and if you want to talk, I’m here.  If you don’t, that’s okay, too.”

“Thanks.”

Did I want to talk about it?  I had mixed feelings about that.  I decided not to think about it at the moment.  It was too uncomfortable.

I worked on squaring the hole I’d dug while Mateo went home for fungi.  It was quite a while before he returned and I noted his damp shirt and a sheen of sweat on his forehead as he wiped it off.  He must have run the entire way, there and back.

“That’s it?” I asked, looking at the small packet.

“That’s it.  I’ll finish digging the hole,” Mateo said, holding his hand out for the shovel.

I gladly handed it over.  I was sweaty and tired.

Mateo made faster progress than either of us, and was soon finished.

“Okay, we need a bucket of water,” he said.

“I’ll get it,” Adriana said and disappeared in a blur of purple.

“I think she’s into you,” I said, once she was far enough away she couldn’t hear.

“Not my type.”

“You mean trans or...”

Mateo didn’t answer immediately and I had the feeling he’d said something he didn’t mean to say.

“Uh.  What I mean is... well... oh hell.  I mean she’s a girl.”

“So, you’re...”

“Gay,” Mateo said and released a huge breath.  “I’ve been thinking about telling you, but then I decided I shouldn’t, but now that I have, I’m glad... and scared, but yeah, I’m gay.”

“Yeah?” I asked, in a tone so enthusiastic I might as well have said I was, too.  Mateo laughed.

“Yes.”

“Have you told anyone else?”

“Noah knows.  Otherwise, no.”

“You are a man of mystery.”

“You can’t tell anyone.”

“Okay.”

“Most people are okay with gays in Verona, but I don’t know how my dad would react and my big brother is a major homophobe.  He’d kick my ass for sure, repeatedly and he’s big enough to do it.”

“I won’t tell anyone.  Is that why you’re so secretive about liking gardening?  You think it will make your brother suspect you’re gay?”

“Pretty much.  Gardening is on the feminine side.  It’s like baking or knitting.  I can’t risk anyone thinking I’m girly.  Guys that are like that are fine, but I can’t have anyone think I’m like that.  Rumors might get back to Agustin and pow.”

“I’m sorry he’s like that.”

“Me, too.  So, you know about me.   Are you comfortable with telling me if you’re...”

I hesitated only a moment before I spoke.  If I was to have any chance at all with Mateo, I couldn’t hide in the closet.

“I’m gay,” I said, right as Adriana walked up.

“I almost get tired of being right all the time,” Adriana said.

“Huh?” Mateo said.

“Someone, whom I will not name, checks you out a little too much for a hetero.”

“Adriana!” I said.

“You may hate me now, but you’ll thank me later, that is if you aren’t the only gay boy standing here.”

Mateo hesitated again as he looked Adriana over.

“He’s not,” Mateo said, apparently deciding it was safe to tell a trans girl.

“Well, damn!  I was afraid of that.  I really do hate being right all the time,” Adriana said, which made me laugh.

“Another certain someone, whom I will not name, checks you out a lot, too, Mateo,” I said, getting Adriana back for her big mouth.

“Who could avoid checking out Mr. Gorgeous?” she asked, pointing toward Mateo with her thumb.  My revenge was entirely unsuccessful.

“I’m not...”

“Oh please, no false modesty.  You’ve surely looked in a mirror.  You’re gorgeous,” Adriana said.

“She’s right,” I said, blushing furiously.

“Oh, you’re so cute when you’re embarrassed, J.C.!  I could hug you!” Adriana said.

“Stop,” I said, covering my face with my hands, wishing that would make me invisible.

“That is so adorable.  What are you doing now, Mateo?” she asked.

I removed my hands in time to see Mateo preening and striking poses.

“I’ve decided you’re right.  I am gorgeous.”

That made us all laugh.  Mateo smiled at me.  I realized he’d acted goofy to distract me from my embarrassment.

“Um, one thing.  You can’t tell anyone about me,” Mateo said.

“Got it.  I know nothing of your fondness for dick.”

“Adriana!” Mateo said.

“Oh, come on.  You’re gay so you like dick.  I like it.  J.C. likes it.  You aren’t alone.”

“Okay.  Okay.  let’s get this tree planted,” Mateo said.  “Pour the water into the hole.”

Adriana did.  Mateo opened the package of fungi.

“Hand me the tree you want to plant.”

I did so and watched as Mateo sprinkled a handful of fungi on the roots and then tossed more in the hole.  He then lowered it, checking the depth.

“Perfect.  I’ll hold the tree, you two fill the hole.”

We did so.  It didn’t take long.

“Our first tree is planted,” I announced.

“Not quite,” Mateo said.  “First, we need to heel it in like this.”

We watched as Mateo pointed his foot at the tree and firmed in the dirt, beginning with his heel.  He walked all around the tree doing so.

“That gets rid of any open spaces.  Now, we need a stake about three or four feet long and something to secure it to the tree with; a bungee cord would be ideal.  We’ll need one for each tree.”

“Um, why?” I asked.

“I think the answer is obvious.  Everyone knows why,” Adriana said.

“Okay, tell me then,” I said.

“I prefer not to share at this time.”

“You don’t know either, you big fake!”

Adriana grinned.

“It’s to keep the wind from rocking the tree back and forth.  Keeping it still will help the roots develop.  It will need to remain staked two or three years.”

“Okay, I’m officially a dummy when it comes to planting trees,” I said.  Adriana began to open her mouth.  “Don’t say it!  I’ll be back in a few.”

I had been lonely when we moved here, but that feeling went away almost as soon as I began working on Mom’s garden.  I still missed Mom so much I cried sometimes, but I didn’t feel alone.  Each morning, I came out and began work and before long someone showed up.  Virginia was here more often than not and Lawrence had begun to frequent the garden nearly as often.  Others showed up now and then, but a community of sorts had grown up around the garden and it was barely started.

The former occupant of the house had left a fair amount of stuff behind in the garage and it didn’t take me long to find a few old bungee cords.  I also grabbed the axe and then stopped by our wood pile and quickly found lengths of wood we could use as stakes.

I slowed as I neared Mateo and Adriana.  They were digging again and Mateo had taken off his shirt.  I couldn’t help but gawk at his muscular chest and rows of abdominal muscles.  I had to look away quickly because activity began to occur in my shorts and, if it continued, my attraction to Mateo would be obvious.

“So hot,” Adriana mouthed and nodded toward Mateo.  I grinned.

She was right, but he was too hot.  I might have had a chance if he was more average, but Mateo was completely out of my league.  He wasn’t automatically attracted to me just because he was gay.  Sometimes, I’d thought I’d detected interest, but I was kidding myself.  At least I had the pleasure of looking at him.

“Here you are,” I said.

“Great.  Oh, you brought an axe.  Perfect.  I forgot to tell you.”

Adriana and I watched as Mateo sharpened the end of a stake, then drove it into the ground at an angle with the head of the axe.

“Always point the stake in the direction of the prevailing wind, then secure it to the tree like this,” he said as he wound the cord in a figure eight, so that the stake didn’t rub the tree.  “Now, it’s done, except for compost and mulch, then more water.  You’ll also want to give it a bucket of water once a week for a year, if it doesn’t rain.”

“Got it,” I said.

“I’ll go get the compost,” Adriana said, then looked pointedly at Mateo and nodded toward him with her head.

I shook my head, which clearly exasperated Adriana.  What was she thinking?  Mateo was way out of my league.

“I’m sure glad you’re here.  I would have planted these trees all wrong,” I said.

“Oh, they would have been okay, but this will be better.  You’ll probably get peaches quicker.”

“You’re entitled to the first,” I said.

“Thanks, although it will take two to four years.”

“What?  I was looking forward to picking some tomorrow!”

Mateo laughed.

We began digging again.  I took over the hole Adriana had left.

I couldn’t help but steal looks at Mateo as he worked.  His arms and his entire torso rippled as he cut into the soil with his shovel and lifted out the earth.  He was absolutely beautiful and the temptation to touch him was nearly unbearable.  I wondered how hard his biceps, pecs and abs would feel.

I turned my attention back to my work.  A bulge was forming in my shorts and I didn’t want Mateo to notice.  I surely didn’t want Adriana to notice either.  Who knew what she’d say?

“I’m so glad you’re creating this garden.  I can indulge my passion under the guise of being a nice guy and neighbor.  I love this,” Mateo said.

“Even digging a big hole?”

“Yes.  I love all of it.”

“Wow, you’re really into gardening.”

“Like you wouldn’t believe.  I have a few things planted near our home, using the excuse that it’s for Mom and what I grown saves us money, but my dream is to own a garden center and grow all the plants I sell.  I’ll have big greenhouses and lots of outside space.  I’ll have a garden like the one you’re making here as an example of what people can do at home.  It might be part of my own farm, only not too big of a farm.  I want to study horticulture in college, but... well, that’s my dream.”

“You should do all that.”

“I’d like to, but... we’ll see.”

“You should do what you love.”

“I will try,” Mateo said.

Adriana returned with a heaping wheelbarrow of compost.

“What are you two gabbing about?”

“You.  J.C. said the most disgusting things,” Mateo said.

“I did not.”

“Don’t worry, J.C.  I know better than to believe Mateo.  You’re too nice a guy to say nasty things about me.  Now, Mateo, on the other hand...”

“I’d prefer not to tell you what he said.  I don’t want to get him into trouble,” I said.

“Hey!”

I laughed.

“Oh good, you finished digging the hole I started.  I tried to delay until I was sure you’d have it done,” Adriana said.

“I bet you did!” Mateo said.

“Hey, I’m not merely beautiful, I’m intelligent, too.”

We continued our work and my eyes continued to rove over Mateo’s sexy body.  Adriana caught me at it numerous times and teased me by wiggling her eyebrows, mouthing ‘hot ass’ and staring at Mateo suggestively when he wasn’t looking.  Who knew a girl could be such a pest?

It was a lot of work, but we planted all four trees, placed a good layer of compost around them and mulched on top of that before watering each once more.

“That’s a good job done, as Monte would say,” I said.

“Who’s Monte?” Mateo asked.

“Monte Don is a professional gardener on Gardener’s World,” I said.

“I haven’t seen it.”

“Maybe we could watch it together sometime,” I said.

“Yeah?  I’d like that.”

“Get a room, you two,” Adriana said.

“I didn’t know girls were such perverts.  We’re talking about watching TV and her mind goes right to sex,” Mateo said.

“How would you like to get beat up by a girl?”

“I don’t think you could take him, Adriana,” I said.

“You’d be surprised how well a shovel upside the head can even the odds.”

“Hey, I didn’t say being a pervert is a bad thing,” Mateo said.

“I’d like to see what’s hidden under your mattress, gay boy,” Adriana said.

“Gardening catalogs,” Mateo answered swiftly.

“Seriously?” I asked.

“Actually, yes.”

“Why would you hide gardening catalogs?” Adriana asked.

“I don’t want anyone to know I like it.”

“That makes no sense.”

“Gardening is kind of a girl thing.”

“That makes no sense either.”

“I can’t risk being out, so I can’t risk anyone finding out I’m interested in anything feminine,” Mateo said.

“Oh please.”

“I’m serious.  If my brother finds out I’m gay, he will hurt me bad.”

“I’m sorry, Mateo, but I think you’re worried about nothing with the gardening.”

“That’s what I told him.”

“Maybe so, but I’m not coming out of the gardening closet,” Mateo said.

“I shall keep all your dirty secrets,” Adrianna said.

Mateo smiled at her, then turned and grinned at me while gazing into my eyes.  My heart raced.

Mateo

“Are you sure about this?” J.C. asked as we stood on his porch.

“Uh, yeah.  Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Well, you’re rather deep in the green closet, as Adriana calls it.  Someone so secretive about his love of gardening might not want to be seen at the farmer’s market, even this smaller Tuesday market.”

I laughed.  “I love her name for it.  I know you both think I’m ridiculous, but I’m sure about going.  If you think about it, the farmer’s market is as much or more for non-gardeners.  Those who don’t, or can’t grow things, go there to buy from those who do.  There are also food booths.  It’s as much a community gathering place as anything, and in a town as boring as Verona, everyone needs something to do.”

“I never thought of that and I do not think you’re ridiculous.  I think you’re worried about nothing, but I understand.”

“Let’s get going then.”

We waved to Virginia, who was seated in her usual chair at the side of the garden and to the few volunteers who were working at various tasks, doing the things we’d been doing before we stopped to go to the market.

“See these two baskets?” J.C. asked as we walked along.

“Yeah...”

“Your job is to make me stop buying plants when they are full.  I sometimes get a little out of control, although my limited funds help with that, too.”

“I had no idea you were an addict.”

“Yeah, I have a problem.  My mom was the same way.”

“The first step to overcoming addiction is admitting you have a problem,” I said.

“Oh, I know I do, so keep me in check.”

“So, do you want me to smack you or merely pull you away?”

“Let’s go with pulling me away.”

“Less fun, but okay.”

J.C. grinned.

“This feels so weird,” J.C. said.

“What does?”

“Going to the farmer’s market with you, being with you.”

“Because I’m in the green closet?”

“No, because you’re you.”

“I don’t get it.”

“I was intimidated when we met.”

“Because I was a con doing time?”

J.C. laughed again.

“That’s quite an exaggeration.  I was intimidated partly because you’d been in trouble with the law and had to do community service.  I was afraid all of you would ignore what I said, refuse to do anything and push me around.  Mostly, I was intimidated by your muscles.  You could easily beat the crap out of me.”

“Oh, so you thought I was a thug?”

“No!”

“I’m messing with you.”

“You have to admit, I’m not a tough guy and you’re a jock with muscles,” J.C. said.

“I’m sure you’re tough in your own way.”

“You know what I mean.  Physically.  Anyway, back to what I was saying.  It feels weird that we’re going to the farmer’s market together because we’re so different.  The jock and the nerd.”

“You’re not a nerd, J.C.”

“I’m a gardening nerd and I don’t see that as a bad thing.”

“I think of you as a sexy gardening boy,” I said.

“Sexy?  Me?”

“Oh yeah.”

“I’m not sexy.  I don’t have muscles and I only have abs because I’m kinda skinny.”

“You are sexy, slim and sexy.”

“Not like you.”

“We’re different, but we can both be sexy.”

“I just don’t get why you even want to hang out with me, although it’s stupid of me to say so.”

“I have several reasons I want to spend time with you.  You’re sexy, which we’ve already established.   You’re funny, witty, and kind.  You’re dealing with the loss of your mom, but you think about helping others.  You have amazing dark red hair and green eyes.  You love gardening as much as I do.  Why wouldn’t I want to spend time with you?”

“Because I’m not a jock.  I don’t know much about football or even especially like it.  I’m not muscular and not at all interested in lifting weights and stuff like you.”

“You’re assuming that we have to be exactly alike.  We don’t.  You have your things, I have mine and we have our things.  It would be boring if we were exactly the same.   I like that you see things differently, value different things and are interested in different things.”

“That’s a good thing because I’m sure different.”

“The bottom line is, whether you get it or not, I really like you, J.C.”

“I really like you, too, and for more than your looks,” he said, and quite obviously meant.

“Thanks.  You know, you’re the only person who knows the real me and likes me.”

“Don’t forget Adrianna.”

“True, but you like me even more.”

“Oh, she’d date you if you were interested.”

“Yeah, but she’s not my type.  Girls are yucky.”

J.C. laughed yet again.

“It must be hard for her,” he said.

“Yeah, some people aren’t very nice about her being trans, even here.  It was an adjustment for Noah.  He was good friends with her back when she was Adrian.  It’s got to be weird to have one of your best friends change from a boy to a girl.  I know that’s not exactly it.  She was always a girl, but physically, you know?”

“Yeah, I get it.”

“That’s one of the things I like about Noah.  He stuck by her and took up for her.  If he wasn’t gay, I could see them dating.”

“Noah’s gay?”

“Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck.  I shouldn’t have told you that.  Don’t tell him, or anyone.  He’s not secretive about it, but it wasn’t for me to tell,” I said.

“I will tell no one, so it’s okay.”

“Don’t tell me any secrets.  I have a big mouth, not that it’s actually a secret, but it’s his thing to tell, not mine.”

“Got it.  How do you know he’s gay?” J.C. asked mischievously.

“Well... Since you already know he’s gay, I guess I can tell you.  We’ve messed around a few times.  We’ve never gone beyond blow jobs and haven’t hooked up that often, but, yeah, that’s how I know.”

“Lucky you, and lucky him.”

“Yeah, but I’m more interested in someone else now.”

“Someone I know?”

“Yeah, someone you know very well.”

J.C. grinned and it gave me a fuzzy feeling all over.

“Here we are,” J.C. said.  “The happiest place on Earth.”

“I think that’s Disney World, but I get what you mean.  Control yourself.”

“I’ll try.  Oh, squash plants!  I want to get a few of these.  I’ve started some from seed, but this will give us a head start.”

“Calm yourself, J.C. and don’t buy too many.  You only have so much room in your baskets and when you fill them, I’m cutting you off.”

He grinned at me.  Damn, he was cute.

The farmer’s market was amazing.  I had been before, slinking around as if I was sneaking into an adult bookstore, but I’d never been able to truly enjoy it before.

Booth after booth of plants, apples, different kinds of lettuce, cheeses and baked goods spread out before us.  It was early in the season, so the selection was limited.  Later, there would be strawberries.  As the summer went on, there would be tomatoes, cucumbers and all sorts of vegetables.  Later still, would come peaches and plums.

There wasn’t nearly as much here now as there would be later, but there was still plenty and I loved the sight of it all.

“Ohh, Rosemary.”

“Don’t get so excited, and don’t call me Rosemary.”

J.C. rolled his eyes.

“Yes, tomato plants!”

I grinned at his enthusiasm.

“See if you can find pineapple tomatoes.  Pink tomatoes are also good and sun gold are the best cherry tomatoes,” I said.

We managed to find pink varieties and sun gold, but not pineapple.  J.C. also picked out purple Cherokee and beefsteak.

“Most people think tomatoes are just tomatoes.  They don’t know about varieties,” I said.

“Well, we shouldn’t make fun of the ignorant.”

“I do pity them, though.”

“You’re kind of a garden nerd, you know that?” J.C. asked.

“I can live with that and if I am, you are.”

“Oh, I have long been a nerd in many different ways.  You know that nerds run things, right?  Once computers and the internet appeared, the reign of the jocks ended.”

“Yeah, those were the good old days when we could beat up nerds and not have to worry about going to them for a job later in life.”

“Have you ever beat up anyone?”

“I got into a couple of fights before I moved to Verona, but I wasn’t beating on nerds.  Both times, it was basically the other guy and me being dumbasses.  I also got into a fight with my brother and he kicked my ass.”

“I’ve never been in a fight,” J.C. said.

“That’s because you’re a kind guy who doesn’t piss others off.  Fighting truly isn’t all that fun.  It hurts.  It’s much better to watch a fight than to be in one.”

“I’ll remember that.”

I stiffened when I spotted Finn Upton and Nico Cardoza from school.  Finn would be a senior this fall and Nico a sophomore.  Why did they have to be here?

“What’s wrong?”

“See those two guys?”

“Oh, yes.  Nice.”

“They’re football players.  I don’t want them to see me here.”

“Come on.  They won’t suspect you’re a closet gardener.  You’re also overlooking one very important point.”

“What’s that?”

“They’re also here.  Maybe they’re in the green closet too.”

“I’m being stupid again, aren’t I?”

“I’d put it kindlier, but basically, yes.”

“Oh crap.  They’re headed our way,” I said.

“Relax.  If there is trouble, I’ll attack them with my killer tomatoes.”

“You’re Agustin’s little brother, right?” Finn asked me as they approached.

“Yes.”

“Is it true he can’t play football this fall?”

“Yeah, Dad wants him to get a job, and he wants to as well.  He’s become pretty serious about taking care of his kid.”

“Dang, I can’t imagine having a kid at sixteen.”

“He was surprised,” I said.

“Did Tiffany Soren really come and dump the kid off?” Nico asked.

“Yeah, when I was home alone.  I didn’t know what was going on.”

“At least it wasn’t yours!” Finn said.

I uneasily laughed along.

“Oh yeah, this is J.C.  He’s beginning school this fall.”

“You’re the one doing the garden thing, right?” Finn asked.

“Yeah.  My mom died not too long ago and we gardened together.  It’s sort of a memorial to her.”

“I’m sorry, man.  That’s rough.  Maybe I’ll stop and help sometime.   I grew up on a farm.  I never thought I would, but I kind of miss it.”

J.C. gave me a look that said, See?

“That would be great.  It’s going to be a community garden.  Lots of people are helping.  You can come and get a space to grow some stuff if you want.”

“I’d like that.”

“That’s so gay,” Nico said.

I swallowed.

“You should know,” Finn said.

“Ha.  Ha.”

“Tell your brother I said, ‘hi,’ and that we will sure miss him this fall,” Finn said.

“I will.  I’m going to try out for the team,” I said.

“Great.  If you’re half as good as your brother, we’ll be thrilled to have you.  I’ll stop by sometime, J.C.”

“Sweet.  I’m usually there.”

“Awesome.  Later guys.”

“Yeah, later,” Nico said.

“What did I tell you?  Finn is a football player and he wants to garden,” J.C. said.

“Well...  Crap, if he shows up, he’ll see me there.”

“You’re truly being ridiculous now.”

“I’m sorry.  I know you’re probably right, but give me some time.”

“As you wish.”

“Those two were both hot, don’t you think?  Did you see Finn’s biceps?”

“I didn’t notice.”

“Liar.”

I laughed.

We continued shopping.  J.C. bought more herbs and the last free spaces in his baskets were taken up by the elusive pineapple tomato plants, which we finally discovered.

“You are done,” I said.

“But...”

“My job is to cut you off when your baskets are full.”

“Just one more...”

“That’s what all the plantaholics say.  Nope, we’re leaving.”

“It’s a really good thing you’re here, Mateo.”

“Yeah, without me, you’d run wild.  Let’s go.”

“You’re so bossy.”

“Get used to it.”

J.C. grinned.  I so wanted to kiss him.

I also wanted to hold his hand, but I settled for carrying one of his baskets for him.  We slowly strolled back to his place, then spent the next two hours planting what he’d purchased, and helping others to plant.  I loved being in the garden.  I wanted to live here.

“Let’s go inside.  There’s something I want to show you,” J.C. said.

“Oh?  Are you sure you want to move that fast?”

“Funny.  We’re going to watch Gardener’s World.  I can’t believe you’ve never seen it.”

“I guess that will be good, too,” I said, grinning.

I sat on the couch and waited while J.C. found the show he was seeking and started it.

“Dang, that garden is gorgeous,” I said.

“Yeah, and huge.  I learn a lot of stuff from this program.  I used to watch it with Mom.”

Most boys our age would not have been interested in starting a garden pond, tending to banana trees or pruning roses, but I loved it.  I learned a few things, too.

“Hey Monty has a basket like yours,” I said pointing to the host, Monty Don, carrying a basket that could have been a twin to those J.C. used.

“Yeah, they’re Sussex trugs.  They are handmade in England.  The two I have were Christmas gifts from Dad to Mom a few years ago.”

We had sat so close our legs were touching throughout the program and from time to time we pressed our knees together.  Even though I was focusing on the program, I began to get hard.  When the closing music began to play, I turned and gazed at J.C.  He looked back at me and his eyes fell to my lips.  I leaned in and kissed him and then we began to make out.  We didn’t do more, but the feel of his lips on mine was intense and when our tongues entwined, my dick flexed.  I was very tempted to grope him, but at just that moment heard someone walk across the porch.  We shot away from each other and moments later, J.C.’s dad entered.  That was close.

I left soon after with a bulge in my shorts and aching nuts.  I knew what I’d do when I got home, if I could find any privacy.  My balls actually kind of hurt, but also felt good, if that made any sense.  I wasn’t all the way hard, but my dick swung around in my shorts.  I hoped no one noticed.

Making out with J.C. was the best.  It was even better than messing around with Noah and we’d gone further.  I wondered if Noah would mind if we didn’t for a while.  I loved hooking up with him, but I wanted J.C. in the worst way and I wanted us to be more than guys who messed around.

Maybe I was dreaming.  How long could I keep my feelings for J.C. a secret?  My brother would find out sooner or later and he was still more than capable of kicking my ass.  I had to be very careful.  I wondered about Dad, too.  What if he told me to get out?  It could happen and he wasn’t exactly in the best of moods these days.  He might view me liking boys as worse than Agustin having a kid.

I’d have to give it more thought.  The same was true about remaining in the green closet.  Finn Upton was a major football jock.  He might even be quarterback this fall.  He had no problem with being out about liking to garden.  Maybe I shouldn’t either, but what about Nico’s reaction.  That’s so gay.  What if my interest in gardening tipped off my brother that I was a homo?

I knew J.C. would tell me I was being ridiculous and maybe I was, but he’d never had his ass kicked by my brother.  He’s never been hurt and tormented by him.  Agustin wasn’t an evil asshole, but he was a brutal thug at times.  I once thought he’d crushed my nuts when he squeezed them so hard to force me to submit.  I don’t remember what it was he wanted me to do, probably work he was supposed to do, but I remembered the pain well.  I did not want to experience it again.

I wished things could be simple and easier, but a lot of life just plain sucked.  I was sure my parents did not want to live in a trailer park any more than I did, but that’s the way it was.  It could be worse.  We could be sharing a cardboard box somewhere, but I hoped for something better.  I wanted to give my parents something better, too, but I had no idea how to bring that about.

J.C.

“Hey, Dad.  I got...”

My step faltered as I entered the kitchen.

“Your dad ran out to get milk so I can make gravy.  I was teaching him to fry chicken.”

I recovered from my shock at finding Mrs. Strong at the kitchen range.

“Oh, uh.  Okay.”

“Sorry for the surprise.  I brought lemon balm over for the herb garden.  Your dad and I talked and somehow the conversation worked its way around to his inability to fry chicken.”

“He’s never been good at that.  Me either.”

“I can show you sometime if you like.”

“Uh...  Yeah, maybe.”

“It’s the least I can do.  I truly appreciate what you’re doing, J.C.  My husband died seven years ago and we had no children, so I’m often lonely.  Thanks to your garden, I can come and be around others and have someone to talk to.  I’m not the only one it helps either.”

“Thanks.  To be honest, the garden began as a memorial to my mom.  I didn’t even think about it as a community garden at first, but then neighbors began helping and my plans changed.  I was lonely when I started.  Dad works a lot, but I know he was lonely, too.  He seems happier now.”

“Losing a spouse is very hard.  I know.  Too many of us know.  I’m sure losing your mother was extremely difficult.  Your dad has told me a great deal about her.  She sounds wonderful and I wish I could have met her.”

“He has?”

“Oh yes.  He talks about her all the time, then apologizes for doing so.  I tell him to go right on talking about her, and before long he does.  I think it helps him and I genuinely like hearing about her.  He tells me you gardened with her a lot.”

“Oh yeah, she taught me everything I know.  I wasn’t always a willing student, but now I’m thankful for even the least enjoyable parts.”

“Life is like that.  You don’t realize that someday you’ll miss doing even the things you didn’t enjoy.  I would gladly relive my worst day with Paul simply to be with him again.”

“All right, what are you two saying about me?” Dad asked as he entered the kitchen, carrying a grocery bag.

“Why would we be talking about you?” I asked.

“Because I’m fascinating.”

I shook my head.  “Actually, we were talking about you.  I was giving Mrs. Strong all the dirt on you.”

“You better not have.”

“Call me Jessica, please.  The chicken is nearly finished.  Do you know how to make gravy?” she asked Dad.

“I’ve never tried,” Dad said, giving me an exaggerated wink.

“You big liar,” I said.

“How can I get her to do it for me, if I admit I can do it myself?  Gravy is something I’m good at.  I’ll get started on it.”

Soon, Dad and Jessica were shoulder to shoulder at the stove.  They both seemed happy.  I was glad Dad was happy, but yet, something felt wrong about the whole picture.  I wasn’t sure I liked Jessica being so chummy with my dad, especially in the kitchen.  I knew I wasn’t being fair, but I felt as if she was trying to replace my mom and I didn’t like it one bit.

I hid my feelings for Dad’s sake and because I knew I was being irrational, but the situation was more than a little awkward.

“Okay, the chicken is done,” Jessica said as she placed the last piece on a plate covered with paper towels.  “The green beans are ready as well, so you’re set.  I’m heading out.”

“No, you’re not.  You’re going to eat with us,” Dad said.

“No.  I didn’t offer to show you how to fry chicken to wrangle a supper invitation for myself.”

“Of course, you didn’t, but you’re staying.  I insist.  J.C., set three places, please.  You aren’t going anywhere, Jessica.”

Jessica looked at me.  I nodded and did my best to smile, although I wasn’t feeling it.

The chicken turned out to be delicious.  I hadn’t had good chicken since...  Oh hell.  I felt it coming, but couldn’t stop it.

“Excuse me,” I said, stood and hurried from the room.  I made it into the living room before I began to cry.  I sat down on the couch and buried my head in my hands.

Soon, I heard footsteps.

“Hey, Sport.”

“I’m sorry,” I said.

Dad opened his arms.  I stood and he hugged me.

“There’s nothing to be sorry about.  Missing Mom?”

I nodded against his shoulder and then told him how the chicken triggered my grief.  I got myself under control soon and pulled away.

“Let’s go back.  I’m sure Jessica is feeling very awkward.”

“You go.”

“You come, too.  When you’re ready.”

I nodded.

I grabbed a tissue, wiped my eyes and blew my nose.  I was sure I looked like a mess, but Dad wanted me to come back, so I would.  The chicken was really good too.

When I returned, I was surprised to see Jessica dabbing her eyes with a tissue.  She had obviously been crying as well.  I sat, gazing at her with a questioning look on my face.

“Are you okay?” she asked.

I nodded.  “Sometimes, losing Mom hits me all over again,” I said.

“I know how it is.  After all these years, it occasionally happens to me.  Something will remind me of Paul and the grief hits me like a truck.  Mostly, though, I have fond memories.  Keep your memories of your mom, J.C.  Even write them down.  They are your most valuable possession.”

“I never thought of writing them down,” I said.

“Some memories never fade, others will.  If you write them down, you’ll never lose them.”

“Why were you crying, if you don’t mind me asking?”

“Because I could see the pain in your eyes.  I wished I could take it away, but knew I couldn’t.”

“I’m better now,” I said.  “This chicken is amazing.  It reminds me of Mom’s.  That’s what set me off.”

“I understand.”

I knew she did.  Our losses were different, but not that different.  I looked at Dad and he smiled at me.  I nodded.  Jessica was good for him.  Her presence helped him deal with his loss.  No matter what I thought about the situation, I wasn’t going to jeopardize anything that brought him relief.  I’d simply have to get over myself and conquer my irrational thoughts.  Jessica wasn’t trying to replace Mom.  She was simply a kind, lonely lady who was still trying to get over her own loss and find her way.

I didn’t feel like a big crybaby as I ate.  My dad and Jessica understood.  I was more or less fine now, except for the aftereffects of crying.

It was strange with Jessica at the table.  It would have been odder still if we were in our old home, but the newness here helped dampen that.  This was the same table and chairs from our kitchen in Laurel, but the kitchen itself was different.

Jessica insisted on helping to clean up.  With the three of us, it took no time.  We then returned to the garden, where work continued even when I wasn’t there.  I was pleased with what I’d created.

***

“What’s wrong?” I asked as Adriana stomped toward where Mateo and I were planting cucumbers.

“I am so mad!” she said, and smacked Mateo on the arm.

“Well, don’t take it out on me.”

“Sorry.  I should be smacking Leo Adams.  I want to shove him down and slug him in the face repeatedly while he begs for mercy!”

“Um, probably not a good idea to try that.  Leo looks like he could lift a truck,” Mateo said.

“I know that, which is why I didn’t do it!”

“Who is Leo Adams?” I asked.

“He’s a high school football player,” Mateo said.

“He’s a big jerk!” Adriana said.

“What did he do?” I asked.

“He said I’m not trans.  That I’m still really a guy because I like stuff like auto racing and professional wrestling!  It’s the same old stupid gender role crap!  Girls watch the Indy 500!  It’s not all guys in the stands.”

“There are a few female Indy 500 race car drivers, too,” I said.

“Exactly, and you get bonus points for knowing that.  He says I’m not a real girl because I like to watch races.  Plenty of females follow auto racing.  Leo is so stupid he makes me want to scream.  Him saying I’m not a girl is like saying a boy isn’t a boy if he likes to bake or quilt.”

“If he’s such a jerk and an idiot, why do you care what he thinks?” Mateo asked.

“I don’t, but I’m sick and tired of people like him who think there is a list of boy interests and a list of girl interests and no one can cross over.”

Mateo looked thoughtful, no doubt because he was hiding in the green closet, as Adriana called it.

“The world has far too many fools in it, but you can’t let them ruin your life,” I said.

“Yep, fools gotta be fools.  You can present them with the facts, but they probably will continue to be fools, so they don’t matter,” Adriana said.

“This coming from the girl who wanted to beat Leo up,” Mateo said with a grin.

“Well, I get angry, okay?  I guess I was being stupid.”

“You said it, not us,” I said, then laughed.  It was my turn for a smack on the arm from Adriana.  “Seriously, anger is a valid reaction.”

“Yes, but I’m going to take your extremely wise advice and not let that jerk run my life or ruin my day.  I’m going to be happy and pleasant the rest of the day,” she snarled.

“When will you be starting?” I asked.

“Do you want smacked again?”

“I can do without it.”

Adriana smiled.  “I’m sorry, guys,” she said, then hugged us both.

Adriana joined in as we planted small cucumber plants.  I had planned to plant seeds, but time got away from me and then one of the neighbors brought his extras he didn’t need.

“This may be a stupid question, but why is there a line of tipis here?” Adriana said.

“For kids who want to camp in the garden,” I said, as seriously as I could manage.

“What?” Adriana asked, with a confused expression on her face.

“The cucumber vines will grow up the poles.  Doing it this way takes up far less space than allowing them to trail over the ground,” Mateo said.

“Yeah, everyone knows that,” I said.

“I bet you didn’t,” Adriana said.

“Actually, I did.  Mom had metal fence posts set up with netting for the vines to climb, but I don’t have any fence posts and Lawrence gave us his garden stakes and poles.”

We were not alone in the garden.  Virginia was tending her raised bed, where seeds she had planted were beginning to produce little plants.  Lawrence was working from his wheelchair at his raised bed, one of the low ones the right height for kids and those in wheelchairs.  A young mother with two small children was working at another of the beds.

“I can’t believe how well this is going,” I said, gazing around us.  “I thought it would take me years and lots of money to get the garden going, but with all the help and all the donations of plants and seeds, it’s come together fast.”

“True, but there is lots of work ahead.  The garden pond, more in-ground beds, benches, the rose garden you have planned and more.  It will take years,” Mateo said.

“I don’t mind,” I said, listening to the laughter and bits of conversation around us.  “I plan on keeping this going, so if it takes years to get it to where I want, so be it.”

“Even when it’s finished, it won’t truly be finished.  There will be weeding, watering, mowing and all the rest,” Adriana said.

“What have I gotten myself into?” I asked.

“Don’t worry.  I’ll be here to help you with it,” Mateo said.

“We will,” Adriana added.

Mateo’s eyes met mine and he smiled shyly at me.  I grinned back.  Adriana groaned.

“Seriously, get a room, you two, or at least go on a date.  You’re obviously totally into each other, so get on with it,” she said.

“Girls are so impatient,” I said.

“Yeah, and all they want is sex.  They aren’t romantic like us guys,” Mateo said.

“I’m going to smack you both.”

“We sort of went on a date already.  We went to the farmer’s market together,” Mateo said.

“That is not a date!  That’s shopping.”

“Can’t shopping be a date?” I asked.

“No.  At most, what you did was hang out.”

“Kind of felt like a date to me,” Mateo said.

“Me, too.”

“You’re both impossible!”

“Okay.  Okay.  J.C., would you like to go on a date?”

“Yes.”

“Finally!” Adriana said.

“Happy now?” Mateo asked.

“Yes!  I don’t know what took you so long.”

“When you like someone a lot, you don’t want to scare them off.  Besides, I didn’t know if J.C. would want to get involved with a guy like me.”

“Guy like you?” I asked.

“You met me when I stepped out of a sheriff’s department van.  That’s not exactly a good first impression.”

“You turned out to be okay, then more than okay,” I said, and grinned. “What I don’t get is why a guy like you is interested in a boy like me,” I said.

“A guy like me?  Didn’t we discuss this before?”

“Handsome and... well, you have an amazing body.  Adriana drools over you when you aren’t looking.”

“Now you hush!” Adriana said.

“Me handsome?” Mateo asked.  “You’re much more handsome than I am and I love your slim sexy body.”

“Is it getting hot out here?” Adriana said.

“Hush!” Mateo and I said together, then laughed.

Adriana crossed her arms and glared, but I knew she didn’t mean it.

Mateo stepped up close, looked around to see if anyone was watching besides Adriana and then kissed me.

“Mmm, boy on boy action,” Adriana said.

“Girls are such pigs,” Mateo said.  His comment earned him a smack, but he laughed.

Adriana grinned.  “I can’t believe I got to witness your first kiss and I got a picture!”

Mateo and I turned and stared at her.

“You did?” I asked.

“Yes.”

She brought it up on her phone and showed us.

“Wow,” I said.

“We look good together, but that wasn’t our first kiss,” Mateo said.

“You kissed before and didn’t tell me?”

“She’s awfully nosey, isn’t she?” I asked.

“I’ve always thought so.”

“Oh, shut up!”

Mateo

“Uh.  Yeah.  Maybe.  Hold on,” Agustin put his hand over the phone so whoever he was talking to couldn’t hear.  We still had a landline, believe it or not.

“Mateo, can you do me a big favor and watch Magnus.  I can get double-time if I work today, but only if I leave now.”

I groaned and then sighed.

“Yeah.”

“Thank you so much!”  He put the phone to his ear again.  “Yeah, I can do it.  I’m leaving now.”

Agustin hung up and turned his attention back to me.

“His bottle is in the refrigerator.  I changed him only twenty minutes ago, so...”

“I’ve got it covered.  I’ve taken care of him before.  Just go,” I said.

“I won’t forget this.  Thank you so much!  Double-time.  I can’t believe it.  Babies are so expensive.”

“Yeah, yeah.  Go.”

Agustin hurried out, leaving me alone in the trailer with Magnus and Gabriel.  Dad was out working on a renovation he was trying to get finished by the deadline and Mom was helping him.

“I notice he didn’t ask me,” my little brother said.

“You’re eight.”

“I can take care of a baby.”

“Don’t tempt me.  I’d planned to help J.C. today.”

“So do it.  I’ll watch Magnus.”

“There are two main reasons I can’t do that.  One, Mom could kill me.  Two, you have forgotten about changing diapers.  When he wets, it’s bad enough, but when...”

“Oh yeah.  Yuck!”

“Yeah, so you see what I mean.”

“You could take him with you.  Hey, I could come along and help.  I could watch him there, couldn’t I?  You’ll be there, and can change his diapers and take care of anything that comes up.”

“That’s actually a good idea.  I guess you aren’t completely useless after all.”

“Hey!”

I laughed.

“Can you get his stroller out?” I asked.  “I’ll pack up his stuff.”

We set to work.  I gathered up his bottle, extra formula, diapers and everything else I thought Magnus might need without packing anything extra.  I didn’t want to lug anything we didn’t need into town.

I mentally double-checked as Gabriel came back inside.

“I think I have everything,” I said.

“You forgot one thing,” my brother said, looking through the pack.

“What?”

“Magnus.”

“I was going to get him next.”

“Sure, you were.”

“Oh, shut up.”

I left Mom a note, telling her Agustin went in to work, where I was going, and that I had Gabriel and Magnus with me, then carried Magnus out and placed him in the stroller.  Last, I grabbed his pack and closed the door to the trailer.  We never locked it because we had nothing worth stealing.

“I’ll push,” Gabriel said.

“Don’t go too fast.”

“I’m not an idiot.”

“Eh-eh.”

“You’re so funny!”

“I think so.”

He headed into town.  Magnus gazed around, smiled and giggled now and then.  He was generally a happy baby, which was lucky for us all.  That’s not to say he didn’t wake up everyone in the trailer some nights with his squalling and cause endless other problems, but he wasn’t too bad, all things considered.

“I never thought I’d be babysitting for Agustin,” I said.  “I thought I was done with that.  You haven’t needed a babysitter for at least a week now.”

“You’re not funny.”

“Some boys older than you have sitters.  You don’t need one because everyone in the park watches out for each other.  It’s the one good thing about living there.”

“You don’t like it?” Gabriel asked.

“It’s okay, I guess.”

I did not want to list what I didn’t like about living in a trailer park.  That would only make Gabriel feel bad about himself and he had enough disadvantages already.

“You spend a lot of time helping this J.C. guy.  Is he one of your friends?”

“Yeah, he’s a friend and he’s creating something cool.  Later in the summer there will be stuff in the community garden we can pick for Mom.”

“That will be cool.  Will there be peaches?”

“Yes, but in two to four years.”

“Why so long?”

“The trees are still being planted.  It takes time for them to grow and produce peaches.”

“Oh, so they’re like people.  They have to grow up to have kids.”

“Something like that.”

“Mom doesn’t seem as upset about Agustin having a kid as she did at first,” Gabriel said.

“No, but she’s still not happy about it.”

“Yeah, you better not have one!”

“I wasn’t planning on it.”

“Me either.”

“You don’t have to worry about it for a while.”

“Because I’m too young, like the peach trees?”

“Yes.”

“What will change when I get older that makes it so I can have kids?”

“Um, you might want to ask Dad about that.”

“Come on.  Just tell me.  You already told me the boy puts his thing in the girl.”

“Yes, when you get older, you’ll start to produce sperm that can get a girl pregnant.”

“Uh, how does the sperm get in her and what does it do?”

“It shoots out of your dick.  That’s why a boy can get a girl pregnant by putting his dick in her.”

“Shoots out?  Like when you pee?”

“Yes, like that, but it feels much better.”

“How doesn’t pee come out?”

“The sperm travels through a different pipe in your dick than pee does, so to speak, and the pee pipe is closed off when you’re about to shoot sperm.”

“When will I be able to do that?”

“It’s different for different boys, but I could when I was eleven.”

“What’s it like?”

“It feels amazing.  It’s like pleasure shooting through your whole body.”

“I’ve felt that.”

“When?” I asked.

“When I was playing with my dick like you and Agustin do.”

“You haven’t been spying on me, have you?”

“No, but sometimes I see things without meaning to.”

“Okay.”

“When I play with mine for a while, I get this shivery feeling all through my body that feels good.”

“But nothing comes out of your dick?”

“No.”

“Yeah, it’s like that, except you shoot sperm and it feels even better.”

“Even better?  How do you not do it all the time?”

I laughed.

“Most boys do it a lot.”

“So, the sperm shoots out in the girl.  How does that make her have a baby?”

“It fertilizes an egg.”

“Come on, I’m not stupid!”

“That’s what happens.”

“Like a chicken egg?”

“Not exactly.  It’s much smaller, but the sperm fertilizes it and a baby begins to grow.”

“That doesn’t make any sense.  Babies aren’t hatched out of eggs like chickens.”

“No.  It’s a different kind of egg.  It slowly changes into a baby.”

“Seriously?  If you’re making this up, I’m going to be mad.”

“Seriously.  I know it sounds crazy, but that’s how it happens.  You know I don’t lie to you.  I might mess with you for a while, but I always tell you the truth in the end.”

“Are you messing with me now?”

“No.”

“It still seems weird.  So, Agustin shot sperm in a girl and made Magnus.”

“Yes.”

“That’s pretty cool he could do that.”

“Don’t you try it when you get old enough, unless you’re ready to be a dad.”

“I might like being a dad, but not now and I don’t much like some parts of taking care of a baby.”

“Me either, but he’s still pretty cool, isn’t he?”

“Yes, he is.  Magnus is my favorite nephew.”

“He’s your only nephew.”

“You know what I mean.  Hey, I just thought of something!  I’m not the youngest one in the family now!”

“Took you long enough.”

Gabriel growled.

Our talk took up our entire journey to the community garden.  I thought I’d done a pretty good job of explaining things to Gabriel.  He didn’t seem at all embarrassed around masturbating, but, like he said, he’d seen Agustin and me do it.  I wondered when.  I was careful about jerking and tried to do it when no one was around.  I’d have to be careful, but then again, I guess it was no big deal if Gabriel saw me, not that I wanted to put on a show.  I sure didn’t want Mom walking in!  That would be a nightmare.  She had to know I did it.  I was a guy.   But I still didn’t want her to see me doing it.

“Wow, there’s people here,” Gabriel said.

“A lot of the neighbors and others from town help when they can and it’s Sunday, so most people aren’t working.  Hi, Virginia.  Hey, Lawrence.”

“Who is this?” Virginia asked.

“This is my brother, Gabriel.”

“I think you may even be cuter than your brother, Gabriel.  It’s nice to meet you.  I’m Virginia.”

“Everyone thinks that.”

“Since when?” I asked, crossing my arms.  Gabriel giggled.

“I’m Lawrence.  It’s nice to meet you, Gabriel.  Who is in the stroller?”

“It’s nice to meet you both, too.  That’s Magnus, my nephew.”

“He’s our older brother’s son.  We’re watching him today,” I explained.

“Mostly, I’m going to watch him, until his diaper needs changed, then he’s Mateo’s!” Gabriel said.

“I’m going to go do some work, but I’ll be right here if you need me, Gabriel,” I said.

“He can hang out with us.  There are cookies,” Virginia said.

“Yeah, and there better be some left for me!” I said, pointing at my brother, which made him giggle.

I quickly checked on Magnus, but he was now fast asleep.  I was quite sure Virginia and Lawrence would watch over him, too.

I spotted J.C. across the lot and headed in his direction.

I grinned as I approached.  Even better, J.C. smiled when he spotted me.

“I’m glad you made it,” he said.

“I almost didn’t.  I’m babysitting for my brother.”

“You must not be very good at it.  I don’t see a baby.”

“He’s with my little brother, Virginia and Lawrence,” I said pointing.

“Oh, I want to see him.”

We reversed my route.  J.C. peered into the stroller.

“He’s so cute!”

“You might not think that if he woke you up crying repeatedly or if you had to change his diaper.  This is my little brother, Gabriel.”

“Hey, Gabriel.  Mateo has told me about you.”

“What did he say?” he asked, suspiciously.

“Oh, it’s much too horrible to repeat.”

Gabriel glared at me.

“I’m kidding.  He said you’re a wonderful little brother.”

“Don’t tell him that!  I said you were horrible and hideous to gaze upon!”

“Well, that’s obviously not true because you have the same good looks as your big brother,” J.C. said.

“Ha!” Gabriel said, holding his head in the air.

“Let’s get out of here.  He’ll be a total brat now,” I said.

“You’re the brat!”

J.C. laughed as we walked away.

“He really is adorable.”

“He’s actually a very good little brother.  He asked me how babies are made on our walk here.”

“Uh oh.  What did you do?”

“I told him and covered masturbation, too.  He did have some trouble believing me that human females have eggs.”

J.C. laughed.

“How was that talk for you?”

“I tried to get him to ask dad, but once I got going it was fine.  He already knew about jerking off.  I didn’t know it, but he’s seen both Agustin and me do it.  I guess I wasn’t as secretive as I thought, or maybe he’s extra sneaky.”

“It’s probably a good thing if you think about it.  He obviously looks up to you.  He’s seen you do it, so he won’t feel guilty about doing it.”

“True.  He said he did it.  That came up as a part of our sperm discussion.  I have no idea when he saw me do it.”

“He’s just curious.”

“I guess.  I’m not going to worry about it.”

“He’s lucky to have such a good big brother and you’re lucky to get to be one.  I wouldn’t mind being a big brother.”

“Okay, quit hinting.  Gabriel is yours.  I’ll leave him here when I take Magnus home.”

“Ha!”

“What are you doing now?” I asked.

“Planting roses.  One of the neighbors gave me some that he’s digging up.  His wife wants an all-white rose garden.”

“Goodie, more digging.  My favorite.”

“You know you like it.”

“Oddly enough, I do.”

“I’m glad to hear that because you’re better at it than I am.”

“Are you flattering me so I’ll do most of the digging?”

“No, it’s merely the truth.”

I began digging and was pleased to see that the hole J.C. had dug was square, just like I’d taught him when we were planting fruit trees.  I didn’t mind the work.  I loved the smell of fresh earth and I was in a garden.  All of the plants were on the small side, but summer hadn’t officially started yet.   It was barely June, which was my favorite month because it was the beginning of everything in the garden.  This was the month when plants truly began to grow and it was warm enough to plant almost anything.

J.C. and I worked near each other.  He wasn’t as strong as me and struggled, but I loved the determination on his face.  I was quite sure he would have created a garden here with no help at all.  It would have taken him a very long time, but he would have done it.  I could imagine a life with him.  There had never been anyone like him before.  I was attracted to Noah, and lots of other guys for that matter, but J.C. was the first that I was happy merely to be with.

The morning warmed up fast and the work made me sweaty.  I pulled off my shirt and smiled to myself when I noticed J.C. checking me out.  I wasn’t conceited and knew there were fitter and better-looking guys, but it was nice to be admired.  The thing is, I admired J.C. just as much.

When he peeled off his shirt a short time later, I stole looks of his bare torso, not bothering to be secretive about it.  J.C. did not have my muscles, but he was slim and sexy.  I wanted to run my hands and tongue all over his chest and...

I had to stop thinking about his bod.  I was beginning to get hard and I didn’t want to walk around the garden with a huge bulge in my shorts.

This was my dream; working beside a cute boy in a garden.  Was that pathetic?  It was a small dream.  Some dreamed of playing major league ball, winning an Olympic medal or the Nobel Peace Prize.  Others wanted a big mansion and fancy cars or great power.  I merely wanted to be a gardener and share my life with a boy I loved.

Did I love J.C.?  I certainly liked him.  Gazing at him made my heart beat faster and I felt comfortable and fuzzy when I was near him, or even thought about him.  I hoped no one ever asked me to define fuzzy as a feeling.  I couldn’t describe it, any more than I could understand it before I experienced it for myself.  I gazed at J.C. and sighed.  Yeah, I was pretty sure I loved him.  How did that happen?

“Mateo?” J.C. asked.

“Yeah?”

“I want to ask you something.  I was thinking about telling my dad about you, about us.  There is an us, right?”

“Yes, there is most certainly an us,” I said with a grin.

“The thing is I really, really like you, and I know you can’t be out, but if we could be ourselves just at my place, well, that would be really cool.  It would be a little piece of what it would be like if we could be open about it.  So, what do you think?”

“He’d have to keep it to himself and we could only be completely open inside.”

“Oh, I know he will and we can keep it inside.  Think about it.  We can sit on the couch, watch a movie and make out.”

“With your dad watching?”

“That was not part of the plan.”

I laughed.  “True, but if he knows about us, he may keep an eye on us.”

“Yeah, but it’s not like we’re going to... you know... right there on the couch.  We’ve never done anything like that and we could go somewhere no one can see us, if we want to... you know.  Do more.”

I loved J.C.’s awkwardness and his embarrassment.  He blushed furiously.

“Okay.  Yeah.  I’d like that.”

“Yeah?”

“Yes, but only your dad, no one else.”

“Got it.”

“I wish I could be open like so many of the other gay boys are here.  Like you said, this could be a little piece of that.”

“There are a lot of out gay boys in Verona?”

“Oh yeah, more than you’d think, even jocks.  Why?  Thinking of looking for someone better?”

“No!  I’m just surprised is all, not that I’ve thought about it a lot.  I’ve had other things on my mind.”

“You can tell your dad.  You’re so lucky you can do that.  Are you sure he’ll be okay with it?”

“I’ll tell him I’m gay first.  I think he will be fine with it.  If he’s not, I won’t mention you.”

“Sounds good.”

“Great,” J.C. said with an enormous grin on his face.  I so wanted to kiss him.

“We can go on our date then,” I said, also grinning.

“Yeah.  What are we going to do?”

“I think that should be a surprise.”

J.C. and I kept smiling at each other.  I was glad Adriana wasn’t here because she’d definitely have something to say about it.  There were others working in the garden, but not in our area, the future rose garden.  I couldn’t wait to see how it, and J.C. and me, turned out.

We took a break after a bit and walked over to the water cooler set up under the tree nearest the sidewalk where Virginia, Lawrence, Gabriel and Magnus were located.  The ice water was the best and I even poured some over my chest.  It was like a bit of air conditioning.

Virginia was holding Magnus in her arms, talking to him as he gazed up at her.  When I drew close enough to hear I realized she was telling him the story of Goldilocks and the Three Bears.  He listened as if he understood every word.  My nephew was obviously highly intelligent.

“I see you’re helping eat the cookies,” I said to Gabriel, who stood munching on a raisin oatmeal.

“I’m always willing to do my part.”

“Great, you can help us dig, then.”

“Sorry, I’m too little, but I helped plant petunias earlier.”

“Did you?”

“Yes, he’s quite good at it, too.  He was a great help,” Lawrence said.

“If you get tired of that, you can help us plant roses.”

“I don’t think so!”

“It was worth a try.”

“Hey.”

I turned and spotted Finn.

“You came,” I said.

“Did you figure that out all by yourself?”

“Funny!”

“How can I help?”

“I hope you like to dig,” I said.

“It’s not one of my hobbies, but I’m willing.”

“Good, come with us.”

“Yeah, we’re planting roses,” J.C. said.

We led Finn over to the future rose garden.

“Why are the holes square?” Finn asked, noting those we had been digging when we stopped for a break.

I explained what I’d told J.C. when we planted fruit trees, then demonstrated how to apply mycorrhizal fungi when the time came.  Luckily, we had some left.

I also explained how all the trees and many other plants were linked by the fungi and how they communicated.  I talked way too much for someone who was in the green closet, but I had more than half made up my mind to come out.  J.C. was right.  I was being ridiculous.

Finn soon took off his shirt and his sweaty chest gleamed in the sunlight.  J.C. and I exchanged a look, then smiled.  Finn was most certainly a hottie.  He was 6’3” with blond hair, blue eyes, muscular and defined.  From what I could make out through the shorts, he also had a hot ass and a big bulge.  He obviously liked gardening, too, but with all that, I wouldn’t trade him for J.C.

With Finn, the work progressed more quickly.  Later in the afternoon, Noah and Adriana joined us and it moved faster still.  We planted all twelve roses, watered them in, mulched them and performed a few other tasks in the garden.  My ass was dragging by the time the light began to fail, but I was content.

Magnus had been no trouble at all.  He’d never had so many babysitters.  I didn’t even have to change his diaper once.  My nephew was a very popular kid.  Gabriel had fun showing off the baby, helping out in the garden and playing with the few other kids.

I so wanted to kiss J.C. when we parted, but there was no chance of that.  I could wait.  We’d kiss and make out soon, not soon enough for me, but soon.  Later still, we’d do more.  I couldn’t wait.

J.C.

“Can we talk?” I asked Dad, as the last of the garden helpers departed for the day.

“You know we can always talk,” Dad said, putting his arm over my shoulders as we walked toward the house.

“This is kinda a big deal,” I said.

“I’m listening.”

“Let’s sit down first.”

“Okay,” Dad said cautiously.

We sat together on one of the porch swings.  For a few moments, I gazed out at the garden in the failing light.  The scent of roses wafted from nearby, setting me a bit more at ease.

“I’m going on my first date soon,” I said.

“That’s wonderful, J.C.  Is it someone special?”

“Yeah.  I think so.”

“What’s her... or his name?”

I turned to look at my dad.  He didn’t assume it was a girl.

“Mateo.”

“Congratulations.  He’s very handsome... and fit.”

“Yeah, too handsome and fit for me.  I don’t understand why he’s interested in me.”

“You’re handsome, too, Son.  Any guy or girl would be lucky to go out with you.”

“You have to say that.  You’re my dad.”

“True enough, but it’s also true.”

“Eh, I don’t think so, but Mateo thinks I’m handsome.”

“That’s all that matters then,” Dad said.

“I dunno.  I feel like I’m not good enough for him, but funny thing is he didn’t think I’d be interested in him because of the trouble he’s been in.”

“I can understand that, although it’s not like he’s a hardened criminal.  I did worse when I was his age.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, but I’m not telling you about it, at least not now.”

“He’s so out of my league,” I said.

“Obviously not.  You have a date with him.”

“During which I will no doubt make a fool of myself.”

“All you need to do is be yourself.”

“What if I stammer or do something stupid?”

“Then that’s what happens.”

That was not what I expected my dad to say.  I looked at him again.

“Listen, J.C.  It’s okay if you say something stupid.  It’s okay if you mess up.  He’ll like you anyway.  Your mom went on a first date with a boy who tripped over his own feet and then later spilled a full glass of Coke on her.  He was a major dweeb, but she still married him.”

“You dumped a glass of Coke on Mom?”

“I was so nervous during our first date I kept getting tongue-tied.  I seriously thought I was going to throw up.  I felt like I did everything wrong and after I took her home, I was sure she’d never speak to me again, let alone go out with me, but the next time I saw her, she smiled at me and asked when we were going out again.”

“Well, that lowers the bar for me considerably.  It will be hard to do worse.”

“Your mother found it endearing.  She said I was like a bumbling puppy.  I wasn’t terribly pleased with the comparison at the time.  That was not at all the image I was shooting for, but it worked out.  Now, that fiasco of a first date is one of my fondest memories.  Go on your date, be yourself, have fun and don’t worry about it, but you’d better be home by midnight or you will have trouble.”

“Thanks Dad and thanks for not assuming my date was with a girl.”

“This is the 21st century.  All that matters to me is that you are happy.  If it’s with a boy, fine.  If it’s with a girl, fine.  I don’t care as long as you have a chance to experience what I did with your mom.”

I hugged my dad.  He held me tightly for several moments, then mussed my hair.

We headed inside and I walked up to my room.  My coming out had gone smoothly and could best be described as anti-climactic, not that I had any big fears about it.  I’d never been secretive about any interest that might have tipped off my parents about my sexual orientation.  I had photos of Finn Wolfhard and Jacob Tremblay on the walls of my bedroom as well as a couple of shirtless photos of boys.  That was surely a tip off.  I’d never come out and said I liked boys, but then it wasn’t that clear cut.  Old fashioned terms such as gay, straight and bi didn’t truly apply anymore.  I was interested in boys, but there might be a girl out there I was into, and if so, it was all good.  It was older people who got hung up on such things.

I browsed my closet for what I could wear for my date, although we hadn’t set a day or time yet.  Mateo was making the plans.  He wouldn’t tell me anything about it, except not to dress up.  That was fine by me.  I didn’t like dressing up.  Still, I wanted to look good.  I considered several options, but still hadn’t decided when I began to yawn.  It was a task I’d leave for later.

The day of our date was not long in coming.  I think Mateo was as eager as I was.  I would have been nervous, but I was too busy to think much about what might happen.  My talk with Dad had largely put me at ease, too.  I just hoped I didn’t throw up on Mateo.  That would not be a fond memory, even decades from now.

I was a bit nervous as the day of our date dawned, but it was still hours away.  To calm myself, I focused on the preschoolers coming to the garden for a field trip later this morning.  The teacher was another of our neighbors and when she’d asked if she could bring the kids, I quickly agreed, although I wondered how interesting little kids would find gardening.

It was Adriana who came up with an activity idea.  While the kids were here, they’d each get the chance to place a small plant into a little pot and take it home with them.  We had lots of little marigold and zinnia plants that were just now getting about three inches high.  We needed to thin them out so it would be a good use for them.  We also had lots of small black plastic pots that couldn’t be recycled.  Adriana painted them in pretty colors to make them more attractive.  She was going to be in charge of the activity.

Unfortunately, there wasn’t anything in the garden the kids could pick, but if we did this kind of thing later on when the garden was established, the kids could pick peaches, apples, strawberries or whatever.  At this point, the fruit trees were years from producing, and the blueberry and other fruit-bearing bushes we’d planted weren’t established enough to bear fruit.

Fourteen kids arrived mid-morning, walking in a single file line with a teacher at the front and another at the rear.  They looked so tiny it seemed impossible that I’d once been that size.

I feared kids wouldn’t be much interested in what we were doing, but they listened attentively as I explained about the garden and when I brought them to Virginia’s raised bed, they all peered at the plants and asked her questions about the little seedlings that were popping up.  Some of them seemed quite amazed that the tiny plants would be large zinnias in a few weeks.  Virginia enjoyed herself, too.

“Now, we’re going to play a game,” I said.  “It’s called guess what it is.”

I took my clippers and cut off small pieces of a plant and then handed them out to the kids.

“Does anyone know what it is?” I asked.

“Leaves!” one extra tiny boy said.

“Correct, but what kind?  What does it smell like?”

“A candy cane!” one of the girls said.

“Peppermint!” said another.

“You’re all right.  It’s peppermint and it is used in making candy canes.  Let’s try another.”

I moved on to another herb and once again handed out small sprigs.

“Leaves!” the tiny boy said again when I asked for guesses.

“It smells like spaghetti,” said another.

“Pizza!”

“You’re all very good at this.  This is an herb called oregano and it’s often used in making spaghetti sauce and pizza.”

The next plant was more difficult for them to identify.

“Leaves!” the tiny boy said once more, making me laugh.

“Um, it smells like sausage,” said one of the girls.

“This is called sage and it is used in making sausage.  It helps give it flavor.”

I next gave them sprigs of lemon balm.

“Leaves,” the tiny boy said with a grin, which made all the adults near laugh.

“It smells like lemons, but it can’t be used to make them,” another boy said, looking puzzled.

“You’re right.  It does smell like lemon, but it’s not used in making them because lemons grow on trees.  It’s called lemon balm.  Long ago, lemons were hard to get because they grow far away and most people who lived here never saw one, but lemon balm gave drinks and other things a lemony flavor.”

We continued the tour.  All the girls but one wrinkled their noses at the compost heap, but the boys loved it.  The highlight of the tour was near the end, where Adriana took over and handed a pot to each child and with the help of Mateo, myself, and the adults present guided the kids in filling the pots with potting soil and planting their own zinnia or marigold.

I invited all the kids to return when they wished.  The teachers knew about the opportunities for the community to use garden space, so I was sure they would pass it on to the parents.  When the kids departed clutching their plants, they laughed and skipped, so they’d apparently enjoyed themselves.

“That went well, don’t you think?” Mateo asked.

“Yes, especially thanks to Adriana.  They loved planting flowers.”

“You did a great job engaging them,” Adriana said.

“One of my favorite things is smelling herbs and flowers.  At the age of those kids, they pay more attention to smell and sight.”

“How do you know all these things?” Adriana asked.

“I’m brilliant.”

“Modest, too,” she said.

“It’s hard to be modest when you’re as awesome as J.C.,” Mateo said.

“Your opinion doesn’t count.”

“It’s the only one that matters to me,” I said, putting my head on Mateo’s shoulder for a moment.

“You two are insufferable.”

“You will be, too, as soon as you find someone,” Mateo said.

“Yeah, guys are lining up for a chance at me.”

“You only need one,” I pointed out.

“Yeah, but where is he?  I will die alone.”

“No, you’re too cute,” I said.

“Sexy, don’t forget sexy,” Mateo said.

“Funny.”

“Witty.”

“Charming.”

“Okay!  Stop!  Stop!” Adriana said.

“Would you like us to list your bad qualities next?” Mateo asked.

“No!”

“Pity.  That would have been fun.”

“I know what will be fun, planting gooseberry bushes!” I said.

“Oh boy, more digging,” Adriana said, but smiled.

***

“I’m intrigued,” I said to Mateo after Dad dropped us off at the Selby Farm for our first date.

“Good.  Come on.”

“I hope your idea of a good first date isn’t farm work,” I said.

“Hey, you love gardening.”

“Yeah, but...”

“Not to worry.  There is no work involved.  Come with me.”

“This place is big,” I said.

“Yeah, that’s right.  You’ve never been here.”

“No, so this is where Ethan, Nathan, T.K. and his brothers live?”

“Yeah.  I arranged everything with Ethan.  He was only too happy to help out.”

“So, we won’t have the dogs set on us.”

“The only dogs here are very friendly.”

We walked past the large barn and down the hill between fields of corn that wasn’t even knee high yet.

“Where are we having our picnic?”

“You guessed!”

“You are carrying a picnic basket, Mateo.”

“I was afraid that might give it away.  Now, the surprise is ruined!”

“You’re such a goof,” I said, making Mateo smile.

“You will soon see, but this is not just any picnic.  My boyfriend deserves something special.”

I swung my head around so fast my neck popped.

“Boyfriend?”

“If you’re interested, that is.  If you have a better offer, I’ll understand.  Finn perhaps?”

“You really want to date me?”

“Uh, yeah.  I’m pretty sure we’re on a date right now.  That is the plan, right?”

“Yeah, but you haven’t spent that much time with me.  What if you decide you don’t like me?  I’m not all that, you know.  I’m not muscular and athletic like you and...”

“I already decided I like you.  Did you ever consider that maybe built and athletic isn’t my type?”

“Uh, no.  Guys with muscles have always really turned me on.”

“Is that so?” Mateo said, flexing his left bicep.  I nodded while staring.  “Slim guys do it for me.  Mmm.  I love gingers, especially if they have very dark ginger hair.”

“You’re just saying that,” I said, blushing.

“Oh no.  The first time I saw you, wow.  I got a stiffy just looking at you.  I wanted to pounce on you, but I thought that might not make the best first impression.”

“Considering how scared I was of you and your buddies, no.  That would have terrified me.”

“The point is, I find you hotter than you do me.”

“Not possible.”

“Oh, it is.  Believe me.”  Mateo wiggled his eyebrows.  “I also like you a lot.  I’ll be honest, I’m actually very nervous right now because I’m afraid I’ll do something stupid and ruin our date.”

“Hey, that’s my job,” I said.  “I expect to trip and fall on my face with every step I take.”

Mateo grinned, and then he tripped.  I knew he did it on purpose because he kept perfect control of the picnic basket, so that it landed flat on the ground.

“Clumsy me,” he said, then smiled up at me.

I offered my hand and helped pull him up.

“Damn, you’re heavy,” I said.

“That’s another reason I like slim guys.  If you trip, you’ll be easier to pull up.”

We continued on our way.  Mateo soon turned left toward a pond.  Sitting on the shore was a large boat.  Cushions sat on the seats and between the seats was a small table.

“A floating picnic.  Original, huh?” Mateo asked.

“I love it.”

Mateo held the boat steady while I climbed in.  He then pushed off from the shore and paddled until we were near the center.  He opened the basket and covered the table with a red and white checked tablecloth.

“I want you to know that I made everything, with the help of my mom and an online search,” Mateo said, as he pulled out large and very cold bottles of iced tea.

He set out plates, forks and napkins and even a small bouquet of flowers in a vase.  I sat and gazed in wonder.  He’d done all this for me?

“These are Caesar chicken wraps and Waldorf salad pitas.  The pitas are made mostly with apples, grapes, walnut and Miracle Whip,” he explained as he pulled them out and put them on our plates.

“This is pineapple slaw and I think you’ll recognize barbeque potato chips.  I didn’t actually make them.”

“The package was a giveaway,” I said.

“For dessert, we have chocolate chip cookie smores.”

“This is amazing!  I’ve never even heard of most of this.”

“Me either, until yesterday evening.  Mom took me to Kroger in Plymouth to buy ingredients.  We taste tested everything.  I even grew the flowers.  I grow them for Mom in my own little garden plot by our... place.”

“You can have your own raised bed in the community garden or a plot of garden so you’ll have more room to grow stuff.”

“I’d like that, but I didn’t want to ask,” Mateo said.

“Hey, that’s what a community garden is for; that’s what it is.”

“I’ll do that, then.  Thanks.”

“Oh wow, this is good,” I said after I’d tried the wrap.

“Thanks, again.”

“I would have been happy with peanut butter and jelly sandwiches,” I said.

“Now you tell me!”

“I can’t believe you did all this.  You must have spent hours preparing this picnic.”

“Maybe now you’ll catch on to how much I like you.”

I gazed into his eyes.  He truly did.

“I’m beginning to get it, but I like you more.”

“Nope, not possible.”

I almost couldn’t believe this gorgeous, amazing boy liked me.

“I am going to be so disappointed if I wake up and this is only a dream,” I said.

“Unless it’s my dream, then I’ll be the one who is disappointed.”

“Let’s hope it’s not a dream.”

“If it’s mine, I’ll make it come true,” Mateo said.

We took our time eating and enjoyed the scenery.  The pond was surrounded on three sides by woods where the sunlight came through the leaves creating a greenish glow.  The surface of the pond was still, disturbed only by our movement in the boat and an occasional fish rushing up to grab an insect on the surface.  The only sound was that of a very distant tractor.  I was completely at peace.

“I can’t believe you went to all this trouble.  You made every single thing special,” I said.

“I tried to think of what to do for our first date.  I didn’t want to do any of the usual stuff like a movie or eating at a restaurant or even a picnic.  Any of those would have been fine, but I wanted to do something different.  Instead of a picnic in a park, I came up with the idea of a picnic on a pond.”

“I’m glad you added the boat to the plan,” I said.

“Yeah, although I guess the food could have been on a float.  Anyway, when I talked to Mom about what to make for the picnic, she suggested versions of things that were not quite ordinary.”

“Just like this isn’t an ordinary picnic.”

“Yeah.”

“This is amazing, but you’ve set the bar high.  How am I supposed to come up with an idea for a date as good as this?” I asked, gesturing around.

“Any date will be as good as this one if you’re there, J.C.”

I blushed.  I couldn’t help it.

“I’ve never had a boyfriend before,” I said.

“I’ve been dating Noah Schnapp from Stranger Things for quite some time now,” Mateo said.

“Have you now?”

“Yeah, he doesn’t know it, but we’ve been an item for a long time.  I guess I’ll have to break it off.”

“I hope he won’t be too upset,” I said.

“I don’t think it will bother him at all.”  Mateo grinned.

“Wow, I never thought someone would dump Noah Schnapp for me.”

“You’re an even better kisser than him.”

“Oh, so you’ve kissed him?”

“Well, I did have one very good dream about him and we made out.  You’re definitely better.  You also won’t transform into Timothee Chalamet while we’re kissing.”

“Seems to me that could be a good thing.”

“Too distracting and you’re better.”

“Are you sure you’re feeling well?  You seem to be delusional.”

“I am perfectly fine.  I’ve never met anyone like you.  We’re vastly different in many ways and yet you’re the first boy I’ve ever thought I might...”

“What?” I asked, when he didn’t go on.

“I don’t want to scare you off.”

“Come on.  Tell me.”

“Spend the rest of my life with.”

I grinned.

“That’s the most amazing and wonderful thing anyone has ever said to me.”

“I know we’re really young and it’s unlikely to happen, but it could, you know?”

“I’d like it.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

Mateo smiled.  I loved it when he smiled.

“We should probably focus on our first date before we make plans for the rest of our lives.”

“True.  It’s cool the Selby’s let us come here,” I said.

“Yeah, they’re amazing.  Tom, T.K., Trey and some of their friends skinny-dip in this pond.”

“How do you know?” I asked.

“I might have spied on them.”

I laughed.

“Come on, if you were walking and heard boys splashing around, you’d want a look, right?”

“Yes.”

“That’s what happened with me.  Tom is seriously hot.  T.K. is, too.  Trey is about a year younger than us, so he isn’t so interesting, but his brothers.  Nice.”

I grinned.

“I like having someone to talk to about this stuff,” I said.

“You don’t have conversations like this with your dad?” Mateo teased.

“Yeah, right.”

“Really?  My dad and I talk about boys I think are hot all the time.”

“I know that’s a lie.”

Mateo laughed.  “Yeah, the closest I get to talking about sex with my parents is when Mom asks if there is anyone special in my life.  I recently told her there is.”

“So, she knows about you and Noah, huh?”

“I was talking about you, but she knows nothing.”

“I told my dad I really like you.”

“Oh yeah.  Was he horrified?”

“No.  He thinks you’re great, and very good looking.”

“He’s not going to hit on me, is he?”

“No!”

“I like your dad.  He’s cool.”

“I wish you could have met my mom.  She was amazing and I think she would have loved you.”

“Well, I am lovable.”

“And, full of yourself.”

“Just a bit.”

“I’m not at all.”

“That’s part of your charm.”

“I don’t have any reason to be full of myself.”

“Are you fishing for compliments?” Mateo teased.

“No.”

“You have a lot going for you, from your looks to your personality to the way you care about others.  It’s a package I like very much.”

“You like my package, huh?” I asked.

“Well... that is a package I want to unwrap someday, but there’s no hurry.  My dick doesn’t agree with that, but luckily, I’m in control.  It isn’t.”

“I feel like mine may stage a coup sometimes.”

“Make no mistake.  I want to get naked with you, J.C., but not yet.  I want to experience a lot of other things with you first.”

“Good.  I feel the same about you.”

“I told you I’ve messed around with Noah, my friend Noah, that is, not Noah Schnapp.  We went as far as blow jobs, but it was nothing more than messing around, you know?  It was hot, yes, but it was just something we did to relieve the never-ending pressure in our nuts.  Noah is a good friend, but he could never be a boyfriend.  I’ve never thought of him like that.  With him, it was sex and nothing more.  With you, I want more.  Oh, I told him I couldn’t mess around with him anymore.  I told him there’s someone special in my life.  I didn’t mention your name, but I think he’s got it figured out.”

“You can tell him.”

“Cool.  I didn’t want to without asking.”

“How did he react?”

“He was disappointed, but also understood.  He’s cool.”

“Also good at spray painting ten-foot penises I hear,” I said.

“Yeah, I was the model for that.

I laughed.

“What?  You don’t believe me?  I’ll show you!”

Mateo pretended he was going to push his shorts down and a part of me wished he would, but then he laughed.

“I hope your dick isn’t ten feet long, or even ten inches.  I cannot measure up to that.”

“You’re in luck.  It’s not even ten inches.  You know, there are guys who are that big?”

“Our age?”

“Not as far as I know.  Older guys.”

I nodded.

We left the topic of dick behind, but I did wonder about what Mateo had in his shorts.  I put that aside to think about later.  Now, I wanted to enjoy our date.

That’s exactly what we did.  We remained on the water for the longest time, talking, laughing and eating, then Mateo paddled us to the shore.  He hopped out, pulled the boat up so it wouldn’t float away and I handed him the basket.

That’s when it happened.  My foot slipped on the slightly wet bottom of the boat and I tumbled backwards into the pond with a huge splash.

I floundered for a few moments, but quickly rose to the surface and stood with water streaming off me.

“I knew I’d do something stupid,” I said.

Mateo laughed and then jumped in, fully clothed.  My mouth fell open.  I did not expect that.

“Now, we can be stupid together.”

Mateo gazed at me, then leaned in and kissed me.  When he pulled back, we smiled at each other.

“Want to swim?  We’re already wet,” Mateo said.

I nodded.

He pulled off his shirt with some difficulty and threw it onto the edge of the boat with a wet smack.  The sight of his bare chest and rows of abdominal muscle took my breath away.  I tugged my own shirt off, somewhat self-conscious, but Mateo had seen me shirtless before.  He checked out my torso and wiggled his eyebrows.  I followed along as he stripped.  I wondered how far he’d go, but he stopped when he was down to his boxer-briefs.

We swam out into the pond, tread water and gazed at each other.  Mateo leaned in and we began making out.  I couldn’t resist.  I had to touch his chest.

“You’re so hard,” I said.  Mateo raised an eyebrow.  “I meant your chest, the muscles.  Your skin is so soft, but you’re so hard.”

Mateo felt my chest.  “You feel so nice.”

We kissed again while our hands roamed.  I shivered as his fingers grazed my right nipple.  I felt his abdominal muscles and they were as firm as his chest.  I did not venture further down, although I badly wanted to.   I didn’t want to rush.

Making out with Mateo in the Selby’s pond was exhilarating and maddening.  The maddening part came from my flexing dick and the urgent need in my balls, but that made it all the more exciting.  We made out for the longest time and I loved every second of it.

We had serious bulges when we finally swam to shore.  Mateo stepped out first and gave me his hand.  We stared down at our bulges, then laughed.

“Not ten inches, but close,” I said, staring.

“Not close enough!  You have no idea how difficult it is not to grope you.”

“Soon,” I said.

Mateo nodded.

We grabbed our wet clothing, wiped the mud off our feet on the grass and began to dress.

“I feel a bit wet,” Mateo said.

“You didn’t have to jump in with all your clothes on,” I said.

“It was a spontaneous decision.  I couldn’t leave you standing in the pond alone, all soaked and dripping.”

“I can’t believe I did that.”

“It was hilarious.  Don’t worry, you’ll get to see me do something similar sooner or later.”

We did not put our shirts back on.  My body was in no way a match for Mateo’s.  I did not have his bulging muscles, but I didn’t feel self-conscious around him.  He obviously liked me as I was.

“What did you think of our first date?” Mateo asked as we began to slosh back up the hill.

“It was amazing.  I loved it.”

“Thanks, and you helped make it memorable by falling into the pond,” Mateo said.

“I wanted to add my own touch.  That’s my story, and I’m sticking to it.”

T.K. and Tom were by the side of the barn, helping Ethan unload long, heavy poles out of the back of a large farm truck as we approached.  All three were shirtless.  This was my day.

T.K. had muscles like Mateo, and Tom had even more, but Ethan.  Damn.  I didn’t know an old guy in his fifties could look like that.  He was older than my dad and he was hot even with his shirt on, but with it off...  Wow.  Mateo noticed me checking him out and grinned at me.

“How was it?” Ethan asked when they spotted us.

“It was perfect.  Thanks again for the use of the boat and pond,” Mateo said.

“Any time,” Ethan said.

“Did you guys go swimming in your clothes?” Tom asked, noting our still wet clothing.  He might also have heard the squishing sound our shoes made with each step.

“We wanted to be different!” Mateo said.

“I fell in as I was getting out of the boat,” I said.

“I decided to join him.”

“You guys are good together.  You’re both odd,” Tom said.

“Yes, we are,” Mateo said and put his arm over my shoulder.  I loved when he touched me.

“Try it without clothes next time.  It’s better,” T.K. said.

“We wouldn’t have to go home in wet clothes either,” I said.

“Need any help?” Mateo asked.

“No, we almost have it,” Ethan said.

“Can I call Mom to pick us up?”

“I have to go into town.  I’ll drop you off,” Tom said.

“Great, thanks.”

“You just want to leave us with the work,” T.K. said.

“He’s not nearly as dumb as he looks.  Follow me,” Tom said.

He led us to an old Prius.  Mateo and I looked at each other.

“If either of you disses my car, I will hurt you,” Tom said.

“It’s just not what I was expecting.  I figured this was your dad’s,” Mateo said as we climbed in.

“This came up at a local auction when I was looking for a car.  It’s a 2005 and I got a deal on it.  I paid for it myself.  My dads take care of the insurance.  It’s not exactly a cool car, but it gets close to 50 miles per gallon.”

“Wow,” Mateo said.

“Yeah.  I feel like hugging it every time I fill it up.”

“It’s really pretty nice,” I said, as Tom started the car and began driving.

“Yeah.  Everything I’d looked at in my price range was a gas guzzling hunk of junk.  This is not my dream car, but it’s my first and I am proud of it.  I’ve had it for two years and its given me no trouble.  My dads said it was a wise purchase.  Who knows how much I’ve saved on gas already?”

“Beats the hell out of walking!” Mateo said.

“Yeah,” I said.

Tom laughed.

“You can drop us off at J.C.’s house.  I’ll walk home from there,” Mateo said.

Tom soon did just that.  We thanked him and then smiled at each other as he departed.

“I guess the Selbys know about us, too,” I said.

“Yeah.  It’s safe for them to know.  I didn’t tell them who I was bringing, but I also didn’t think it through.  Obviously, they’d probably see us.  I’m not the brightest sometimes.  It’s amazing I haven’t outed myself already.  It’s safe for them to know.”

“It’s cool with me if it is with you.  Today was really great,” I said.

“Thanks.  I had a good time.  I enjoyed all of it.”

“Me too, even falling in the pond.”

“That was especially fun.”

I blushed.  “Yeah.”

“I need to get home, but I’ll see you soon.”

“Not soon enough.”

We leaned in and shared a lingering kiss, then Mateo picked up his basket and walked down the street.  I almost could not believe I had such a wonderful boyfriend.

Mateo

“Shit!” I said and grabbed for my pillow as Gabriel walked in and caught me jerking off.  Worse, I shot before I could cover up and jizz spewed onto my abs.

“Fuck,” Gabriel said, staring.

“Why are you home?”

“I live here.  Will mine get that big?  That was sperm shooting out, right?  The stuff that makes girls have babies?”

“Uh, yeah.”

“Can I measure it?”

“No.”

“Have you measured it?”

“Uh...”  I considered lying, but I tried never to lie to my little brother.  “Yeah, it’s six and a half inches.”

“Wow.”

My shorts and underwear were around my ankles when my little brother walked in.  I tried to pull them up while he grilled me.  I finally managed it so I could remove the pillow.  I reached for tissues to clean up the mess on my abs.

“Why did you cover up so fast?  You said masturbating is okay.”

“It is, but that doesn’t mean I want you to watch.”

“It was amazing.  Will I be able to shoot like that someday?”

“Yeah.”

I was surprised that Gabriel wasn’t the least bit embarrassed.  Instead, he was fascinated.

“Do you moan like that every time you shoot?”

I wasn’t aware I had, but then I was distracted by my little brother walking in at exactly the wrong time.

“Yeah.”

“It must feel even better to shoot than it does when I play with my dick and shiver all over.”

“Yes, it does.  Listen, do not tell anyone about this, okay?”

“Okay.”

“It would also be nice if you would knock.”

“Before I come into my room?  The door wasn’t even closed.”

“Okay.  I see your point.  I thought no one would be home for at least an hour, but I should have closed the door.”

Gabriel laughed.

“Were you surprised?”

“Uh, yeah, and not in a good way!”

“I was surprised, too, but it was interesting.  Can I watch you do it again sometime?”

“No.”

“Come on.  I wanna see.”

“No, that’s too messed up.  I am not jerking off for my little brother.”

“Okay.  I guess seeing once is enough.  Wow, am I looking forward to when I can do that.”

It was my turn to laugh.

“I believe you’ll have to wait a while yet, but the wait is worth it.”

“Why does everything cool happen when you’re older?” Gabriel asked.

“It doesn’t.  It only seems like it.  There are a lot of advantages to being younger.”

“Like what?”

“You get to act like a kid.  Someone else pays all the bills and does the laundry.”

“Yeah, but I want to do all the cool stuff, like drive.”

“Look at it this way.  You’ll get to do it.  I can’t drive yet either.”

“You’re closer to it than me.”

“Yes, but I won’t be able to afford a car, so it hardly matters.”

“Waiting is too hard.  How do you stand it?”

“By focusing on what’s good now,” I said.

“That’s easy to say when you can already shoot.”

“Um, don’t say that around others, okay?”

“I’m not an idiot.”

“Really?”

Gabriel glared.

“Okay.  I’m sorry!  I don’t want to get beat up.”

“Yeah, that’s what I thought!” he said, then strutted out of the room.

My little brother was fun, mostly, but certainly not when he interrupted me jerking off.  I felt a little odd about our conversation, too, but I think I’d handled it okay.  I certainly did better than Agustin had.  He’d walked in on me playing with my dick when I was about Gabriel’s age.  He laughed at me, made fun of my size and asked why I bothered when it was so small.  He didn’t explain anything and for a long time after that I thought my dick was an especially small one.  It was a wonder he didn’t give me an inferiority complex.

At least I hadn’t traumatized him.  Maybe it was even a good thing he’d caught me.  He wouldn’t freak out the first time he shot like I did.  I could have used guidance from an older brother beforehand, but Agustin wasn’t that kind of older brother.

Agustin looked exhausted when he came home from work.  Mom was busy preparing supper.  I took pity on my brother and took Magnus from him.  He collapsed into a chair and quickly fell asleep.

Magnus looked up at me, grinned and made the usual baby noises that indicated he was happy.

“You’ll make a good dad someday,” Mom said.

“Why do you say that?” I asked, while thinking that I’d never be a dad and wondering if I should tell Mom.  Then again, I could adopt.  Maybe J.C. and I...  But, I was getting way ahead of things.

“Because you’re very good with Magnus, better than Agustin.  He’s lucky to have such a good uncle.”

“Well, I like him, except when he squalls at night.”

Magnus uttered baby talk that almost sounded like, ‘who me?’ as he gazed up at me grinning.

“It’s obvious you care about him a great deal.”  Mom looked at Agustin, snoozing with his mouth slightly open.  “My poor boy.  He’s learning the lesson of responsibility the hard way.”

“He’s doing pretty good, though, don’t you think?” I asked.  “He works his butt off and doesn’t complain about it.  I hear him up at night every time Magnus cries.  He might be a pretty good dad, too.”

“He is doing well and I hope he’ll be a good father, but it’s hard even for adults and he’s so young.  Even with our help, I know it’s difficult for him.  I appreciate the way you help your brother.  I know he hasn’t always been the best big brother.  Agustin has always been... Agustin.”

“You can say that again.  I mostly help him for Magnus, but I know he’s going through a very tough time.”

“Yes, it will only get harder when school starts again in the fall.”

“I can’t even imagine having a son at his age.”

“Make sure you don’t.  Learn from your brother’s mistake.”

“You have no worries about that.”

“You’re a very handsome boy.  I’m sure the girls are already after you.”

Here was an opportunity to tell Mom the truth.  I could do it now and be done with it.  I only had to say two words, ‘I’m gay.’

“Can I hold him?” Gabriel asked as he entered the room.

I was both disappointed and relieved that my opportunity was gone.

“Yeah.  I think he needs a diaper change.  He’s all yours,” I said.

“I’ll wait!”

I checked and I was right.  Magnus was wet.  He had a certain expression when he was going.  I was lucky he had only peed.

I grabbed the diaper bag and got to work.  I’d changed his diaper a few times now.  Gabriel stood by and watched.

“I’ll take him now,” Gabriel said.

“Yeah, wait until the dirty work is done.  Have a seat.”

My little brother did so and I handed off our nephew.

“I’m your favorite uncle, aren’t I?” Gabriel asked, then made faces.  Magnus giggled.

“Forget it, Gabriel.  I’m his favorite.”

“Nope, I am.”

“I am.  He told me earlier.”

“You liar.  He can’t talk.”

“He talks, but only when we’re alone.  He told me he thinks you look funny.”

“Yeah, right.”

“Can you set the table, Mateo?” Mom asked.

“My work is never done,” I said in my best dramatic voice.

“Oh, you poor thing,” she said, then swatted my butt as I opened the cabinet to retrieve the plates.

Agustin slept through supper.  Mom had prepared chicken and rice with mashed potatoes and it was extra good.  Dessert was grocery store cookies from the clearance bin, but grocery store cookies were always good and these were the kind with M&Ms.

We all moved around Agustin as he continued to snooze in Dad’s chair.  Dad didn’t wake him up to make him move.  He seemed proud that Agustin had exhausted himself working to support his son.  I had to agree that was something.  Truthfully, I wouldn’t have been surprised if Agustin had run off as soon as he discovered he had a kid, never to be seen by any of us again.  He’d never been the responsible type.  Maybe Mom was right.  Maybe having a kid was good for him.

Mom sat and rocked Magnus, feeding him, burping him and then merely holding him while she watched TV with Dad.  I went down the hallway to my room.  I was there only a few minutes before Gabriel arrived and begged me to play Clue with him.  Mom had picked it up at a yard sale this spring and for some unknown reason, Gabriel loved it.  He even watched the movie over and over, an ancient VHS Mom had also found at a yard sale.  I bet we were one of the only families in Verona who had a video tape player instead of DVD.  I bet most of my friends didn’t even know what a video tape player was, but I didn’t invite anyone over.  I preferred they not know I lived in a trailer park.

It was somewhat lame playing Clue with only two people, but Gabriel begged and gave me his oh-so-effective sad little boy look until I agreed.  I settled in for boredom, but it wasn’t all bad.  I liked spending time with my little brother and even more, I liked to see him happy.  Even so, I would have killed for my own room.

***

“Where are you taking me?  It’s Paris, isn’t it?  I told you that you don’t have to top the picnic on the pond,” I said, as J.C. led me blindfolded across his porch and down the steps.

“Yeah, you guessed it.  I’m going to lead you blindfolded to Paris where we’ll dine at a sidewalk café.”

J.C. used extra care guiding me down the steps.

“Couldn’t you have put the blindfold on me in front of the house?”

“No, I was afraid you’d see and ruin the surprise.”

“It’s a good thing I trust you,” I said, as he led me forward.  I could see nothing with the blindfold on.

“For your sake, let’s hope I’m not a serial killer.”

“Yes, getting murdered would not be a good date.  I smell something.  Lilacs.”

“That’s because we are here,” J.C. said, taking the blindfold off.

“Oh wow.”

I’d seen the lilacs in the side of the yard, but now they were in full bloom and the scent was lovely.  It was evening.  The light was beginning to fade.  In the center of the lilacs, which almost made a little dining room, J.C. had set up a table and two chairs.  Two lit candles stood on the tablecloth casting a wavering light on two plates and glasses filled with iced tea.

“Have a seat,” J.C. said.

“This is certainly more elegant than my picnic.”

“Even if it’s not in Paris?”

“I like this better and Paris is quite a hike.”

“Not to mention having to swim the Atlantic.”

“Yeah, Mom would be worried if I stayed out that late.”

J.C. opened a cooler and began to pull out bowls covered with foil and wrapped in towels.  When he opened them, steam came out.  My eyes widened.

“You made all this?” I asked, taking in the pork chops, mashed potatoes, corn and rolls.

“Yeah.  The rolls took the most time.  I started hours ago on them.”

“That’s why your dad kept me busy when I arrived.”

“Yeah, I had to finish right before you got here or it would get cold.  Let’s eat.”

“No one has ever done anything like this for me,” I said.

J.C. grinned.

“I loved the picnic on the pond.  I wanted to do something cool, but different.”

“We don’t have to worry about getting wet either.”

“Unless it rains, and it’s not supposed to do that.”

Damn, I liked this boy so much.  I think maybe I even loved him, but how did I know?  I had no one to ask.  Mom would start fishing for info if I asked her about love.   Agustin didn’t seem the type to fall in love, only lust.  He’d probably laugh at me.  I wasn’t comfortable asking Dad either.  I guessed I’d have to figure it out for myself.

“This is also why you told me not to come over until time for our date,” I said.

“Yeah, I thought you might get suspicious that I was spending so much time inside.  I did work in the garden while the dough was raising.”

I grabbed a roll, put butter on it, real butter no less, and tasted it.

“This is the best roll I have ever tasted,” I said.

“You don’t have to say that.”

“I mean it.  I have never had a home baked roll before.  Mom buys those brown and serve ones sometimes.  They are good, but this.  I think I could eat them all, but everything else is delicious, too.”

“So, I did okay?”

“You did better than okay.  Will you marry me?”

“I might do that someday,” J.C. said.  From the expression on his face, I think he meant it.

“Someday, probably not too soon.  I doubt my parents would let me marry at fourteen and I think they’ve had enough shocks.”

“Romeo and Juliet got married around our age.”

“Yeah, and that worked out so well.”

“I see your point.  I guess we can wait a few years.  I’m not ready to die.”

“Of course, not.  You have to finish and take care of your garden.”

“Our garden,” J.C. said.

I was pretty sure I did love him.

We continued to talk as we ate, about gardening, but lots of other things, too, like the Fourth of July celebration, school in the fall and whether or not we’d dress up for Halloween one last time.  It didn’t matter what we talked about.  I loved being with my boyfriend.

J.C. actually baked a chocolate cake for dessert.  He said it was his mom’s recipe.  It was the best chocolate cake I’d tasted.

After we ate, we moved to a blanket on the grass and began to make out.  It was getting dark enough by then no one could see us in the shadows.  My need for J.C. increased by the moment.  Finally, I worked up the courage to grope him, hoping he wouldn’t object.  He groped me back and then began to tug at my zipper.

We stripped naked and then returned to the blanket.  I kissed my way down J.C.’s body and then drew him into my mouth.  His little whimper caused my own dick to flex.

“I’ve never.  Ohhh!”

That’s all J.C. managed to utter before he blew.  He moaned and nearly drowned me as he shot.  I never thought he’d stop, but his orgasm subsided and he lay panting.

“That was the most amazing thing ever.  I was too fast, though, wasn’t I?”

“That was quick, but no.  It’s all about feeling good.”

J.C. took me by surprise by pouncing on me and licking and kissing his way down my body until he drew me into his mouth.  He tried to take in too much, choked, but then laughed, and tried again.  He went slower and soon I was moaning.

I ran my fingers through his dark ginger hair as his head bobbed up and down.  The wet warmth was what dreams were made of, sex dreams anyway.  Long before I wanted to, I felt the pressure rising and then...

“I’m gonna...”

That was all the warning J.C. received before I groaned and shot.  He didn’t pull off but slowly moved his lips up and down until I was done.  Only then did he lean back.  He wiped his mouth and grinned at me.

“How was I?”

“You did it like an expert.”

“Well, it’s not from practice!” J.C. said and then tumbled into my arms laughing.

I wrapped my arms around him.  We hugged and kissed, then he leaned back and smiled at me again.

“I love you,” I said.

I wasn’t quite sure what made me say it just then, but I was pretty sure I did love him.  I didn’t know how to be absolutely sure, but I felt as if I did.  I also felt the need to say it out loud.

The few moments that passed before J.C. spoke seemed like hours.  What if he didn’t say it back?  What if he did, but only because I’d said it?  What if...

“You really mean it?” J.C. asked.

I nodded.  “Yes.”

“I love you, too.  I’ve wanted to tell you so many times, but I didn’t think you could feel that way about me.  I mean, I’m... and you’re...”

“What you are is amazing, and I love you,” I said, then pulled him back down on top of me and began to kiss him.

We made out, which quickly got us both hot and bothered again.  We blew each other a second time and then J.C. lay in my arms as we gazed up at the stars, which had become visible as we explored each other’s bodies.

“I sure never thought this would happen the day we met,” J.C. said.

“Had your eye on Kai, huh?”

“Well, he is hot, but no.  You were the one that always made the front of my shorts tighter.”

I laughed.

“I never thought about having a future with another boy before you.  My experience with other boys is limited to Noah, but I’ve never met a boy I was interested in, beyond hanging out and maybe hooking up.  I know, we’re young and a lot of things will change, but the possibility is there.”

“Yes, it is.”

“I guess we’ll wait and see and enjoy what we have now.”

“I enjoy your 7”.”

I laughed.  “It’s not that big.”

“How do you know?  Have you measured?  You have, haven’t you?”  Now, it was J.C.’s time to laugh.

“Yes, I have and it’s just over 6.5”

“Bigger than mine.  I’m 6.25.  Yours is thicker, too.”

“So, you measured, too, ha!”

“I bet every boy does.  I wonder what it would be like to have a really big one.  There was this one boy, Derek, in my gym class last year, I swear that thing was 8” and he wasn’t even hard.  He was this skinny white boy but he had the biggest dick.  His nickname was horse.”

I laughed.

“I wouldn’t mind being bigger, but I’m glad I’m not small.  What if you were like 3”?”

“That would be the worst.”

“I don’t want to go, but I better get home soon,” I said.

“Yeah, I should get in before Dad wonders if I’m okay.  I sure don’t want him coming out and catching us naked.”

We stood, dressed, made out again for a while, then I helped J.C. gather everything up and carry it to his door.  There, I kissed him again, then turned and walked down his sidewalk with a huge smile on my lips.

I’d heard of people being so happy they floated on air and that’s what I felt like as I walked back to Graymoor Estates.  It was as if my feet didn’t quite touch the ground.

I didn’t think J.C. and I would do more than make out during our date, but I was delighted things went further.  I didn’t feel like I’d pushed J.C. into more than he was ready for, either.  He clearly wanted it as much as I did.

I had said the words.  I love you.  Even better, he’d said them back and meant them.  I was so happy I was ecstatic.  I wished everyone could know that J.C. and I were together.

Be careful what you wish for, that’s what they say, right?  I’d no more than started up the drive to the trailer park when Agustin stepped out of the shadows and glared at me.

“I should have known you were a faggot,” he snarled.

My face paled, not that he could see in the darkness.  How did he know?  Unless...

“I saw you and that other little fairy.  I saw you with his dick in your mouth, you filthy queer.”

I didn’t have time to wonder what Agustin was doing at the community garden or how he managed to see us.  He crossed the distance between us and slugged me before I could even duck.  I was stunned, but punched him in the gut.  He doubled over for only a moment, before he tackled me and belted me in the face again.  He had me on my back and my movement was limited, but I managed to punch him in the throat.  I scurried out from under him as he gasped and fought for air.  I thought for a moment I might have killed him, but he snarled and came at me again.

Agustin jabbed me in the side and I landed a strong right cross that snapped his head to the side.  We punched and pummeled each other while he called me faggot, cocksucker, fucking sissy boy and every name he could think up.

I was in pain, but I was also infuriated.  I was tired of his crap, tired of him picking on me and most of all, tired of not being me because of him.  I let him have it and did much better against my older and stronger brother than I thought possible.

Even so, he kicked my ass and I ended up on the grass, squirming in pain.  He gave me one last kick and staggered away.

I remained on the grass, moaning with pain for several moments before I struggled to sit up.  I remained sitting until I caught my breath, then staggered to my feet and walked up the lane and into the trailer court.  My gut ached, my sides ached and my face felt like Agustin had danced on it.

I must have looked like a zombie lurching up the lane.  I wasn’t entirely sure I was going to make it, but soon, Gabriel came running toward me, crying.

“Mateo!  Mateo!  Are you okay?”

“I’ve been better,” I said, then grimaced.

I swayed, but my little brother slipped in under my arm and wrapped his around me.

“I’ll get you home, big bro.  Mom and Dad are in the trailer, yelling at Agustin.  I came to find you.”

“I’m glad you did.  I don’t feel so good.”

I hurled.  I didn’t know it was coming, but I felt a tiny bit better after.

“Agustin was calling you names until Dad told him to shut his mouth.  He said you were, well, it wasn’t a very nice name,” Gabriel said.

“I need to tell you something, Gabriel.  What he called me might not be a very nice name, but I am gay.  You know what that means?”

“I’m not a baby.  It means you like boys.”

“Yes, and I have a boyfriend now.”

“Do I get to meet him?  Is he cool like you?”

I smiled.  My little brother obviously didn’t care that I was gay.

“You can meet him.  Actually, you already have.  J.C.”

“Oh, he’s really nice.  I like him.  So, he’s your boyfriend?”

“Yes.”

“I approve.”

“Thanks.  I was afraid I’d have to dump him if you didn’t like him.”

Gabriel laughed.

We slowly made our way to the trailer.  Dad came out before we reached it, but I waved him off so Gabriel could help me.  It was important to him.

“Dios mio,” Mom said when I entered and then began speaking quickly in Spanish, which she did when she was very excited or upset.

Gabriel helped me down on the couch.  Agustin sat in a chair.  He looked like hell, which made me smile.

“Thanks, Gabriel,” I said, and truly meant.

“Anytime, Big Bro.”

I noticed he glared at Agustin and looked like he wanted to kick his ass.

“Are you okay, Mateo?” Dad asked.

I nodded.  “I’m okay, but I could use an aspirin.”

“Agustin said he saw you with another boy.”

Here it was.  Dad was going to go off on me next.  Fuck it.  I didn’t care anymore.

“Yes, he did.  I had a date with my boyfriend.”

Dad gazed into my eyes for several long moments as if thinking to himself.  Finally, he nodded.

“Okay.”

“Okay?” Agustin snarled.  “He’s a f...”

“Don’t you say that word!” Dad yelled.  “You don’t say that in this house!”

“You’re okay with him being a... with him being like that, then,” Agustin said, then shot me a nasty glare.

“I’d prefer he wasn’t, but he is and that’s the way it is,” Dad said.

“What he means is that we love you and want you to be who you are,” Mom said.

“Yeah,” Dad said.

“I can’t believe this.  Are you going to throw a pride parade for him?” Agustin said.

“I will!” Gabriel said.

Agustin turned to Gabriel and frowned, then looked back at Dad.

“I can’t believe you’re okay with this,” he said.

“There is nothing wrong with being gay,” Mom said.

“Oh yeah?  Then why are so many people disgusted by it?”

“Because they are small minded and stupid, just like those who look down upon us because we are Hispanic.  I thought you were smarter than that,” Mom said.

“The bottom line is that we support each other in this family,” Dad said.  “Did we turn on you or kick you out when a girl dropped your baby off?  No.  We stood by you and helped you.  You might remember that Mateo has stepped in and taken care of your son as well.”

“I don’t want him near Magnus and I don’t think he should be trusted around Gabriel,” Agustin said.

“I’m gay, not a child molester,” I said.

“Like there’s a difference.”

“There’s a big difference.  You don’t want me around Magnus, fine.  It will make my life easier.  I won’t have to change his diapers or spend my time babysitting him,” I said, although inside my heart ached because my brother didn’t trust me and I loved my nephew.

“Well, Mateo is going to be around me because he’s been nothing but good to me,” Gabriel said.  He didn’t say so, but there was an implied, “and you haven’t.”

“I wish I could move out,” Agustin said.

“Well, I don’t think that will be an option for you for some time to come.  You should have thought of that before you knocked up a girl,” Dad said.  “Let me make myself clear, you will never lay a hand on Mateo again.  You will be civil to him and keep your bigoted beliefs to yourself.  If you don’t, you’ll have me to deal with.”

Agustin swallowed that down with difficulty.

“Can I go now?  I have to check on Magnus.”

Dad motioned with his head for Agustin to leave.  My brother didn’t even look at me.

Mom descended on me with the first aid kit she’d obviously already used on Agustin.  Dad took a look at my face.

“You’re going to look like a raccoon in the morning with two black eyes, but you don’t look too bad.  Your brother looks almost as bad,” Dad said with a hint of pride.

“Fighting isn’t something to be pleased about,” Mom said.

“Mateo is a man.  Sometimes, men have to fight,” Dad said.

I looked at Dad.  He meant what he said.  He thought of me as a man.

“Yeah, like when someone jumps you and tries to beat you up,” I said.

“I think he more than tried, but from the look of your brother, he paid dearly for it.”

I grinned, then winced as Mom treated my wounds.  Gabriel held out two aspirin and a glass of water to me.  I downed the aspirin.

“Thanks,” I said.

“Why is Agustin being such a jerk?” Gabriel said.

“Perhaps he’s insecure,” Dad said.

“What do you mean?”

“Boys his age, and also Mateo’s, struggle to find their identity and establish their place in the world.  Some decide they have to create a tough and even abusive persona so that others will see them as strong and confident.  Your brother is trying to be what he sees as a man’s man.”

“Nope, he’s just a jerk,” Gabriel said.

“He doesn’t understand what real manliness is,” Dad said.  “A real man takes care of those around him, sacrificing what he wants to make things better for them.  Sometimes, even dying to protect them.  Of course, the same can be said to describe a dedicated mother.”

Mom smiled at Dad.

“Like you do for us,” Gabriel said.

“Well, I have it easier than many fathers.”

“How so?” I asked.

“A lot of dads go off to jobs they hate day after day.  They have to face humiliation from bosses and put up with a lot of crap to support their family.  I love my work.  I’d do it for a hobby if I was a millionaire.  It’s no sacrifice for me, even when I put in extra hours.  The only sacrifice comes from not getting to spend as much time with my sons as I’d like.”

“We’d like to spend more time with you, too,” Gabriel said.

I gazed at my dad.  I never actually thought about all he’d done for us and I’d always found him a little intimidating because I feared he wouldn’t approve of me when he discovered what I was.

“You’re okay with me being gay?”  He seemed to have been saying that the last few minutes, but he’d never seemed like the kind of dad who would be okay with a gay son.

“I am okay with you being you, Mateo.  Who you find attractive and who you want to hook up with doesn’t matter.  After recent events with your brother, it’s somewhat a relief that I don’t have to worry about you knocking up a girl, not that I think you’d be that irresponsible.  You’re far more mature than your older brother in many ways.”

“Thanks.  I was always afraid you wouldn’t like it.  You’ve said things that... you know.”

“I’m very sorry, Mateo, for anything I’ve said or done to make you feel like you can’t be yourself.  I’ll try to do better and I want you to know you can always be yourself around me.”

“Thanks, Dad.”

“That goes for you, too, Gabriel.  I will always love, support and accept you for you,” Dad said.

“Well, that’s easy because I’m so awesome!”

“Keep telling yourself that, little brother,” I said.

Gabriel shot me his meanest, fiercest glare, but couldn’t hold it long before he laughed.

“Why don’t you go lie down for a while,” Mom said.

“I think I will.  I’m sore, everywhere.”

Gabriel helped me to our room.  I’d recovered enough I could have easily made it without his help, but I didn’t tell him that.  He escorted me right to my bed and even took my shoes off after I laid back.

“Don’t worry, if Agustin tries to come in, I will kick him in the nuts,” Gabriel said.

I managed to keep from laughing.

“Thank you.”

I closed my eyes and tried to ignore the pain.  The aspirin were beginning to kick in, but nearly every part of me still hurt.  I’d always suspected and feared this would happen if Agustin found out about me.  I was not happy to be right.  It was worth it, though, because of Dad.  I’d always feared, deep down, that he wouldn’t love me anymore if he found out I was gay.  Not having that hanging over my head was a huge relief, well worth a beating.

J.C.

“What happened to you?” I asked when I spotted Mateo walking toward where I was working at the side of the house.

“Agustin jumped me and beat the crap out of me.”

“Damn, are you okay?”

“I’m sore, but I’m okay and I’m happy to say I messed him up, too.  He clearly won, but he has a black eye and I’m sure he’s sore today, too.”

“Why did he attack you?”

“He saw us.”

“Last night?”

“Yeah, and I am now out at home.  After he kicked my ass, he told my parents.”

“Shit.  How did that go?”

“Amazingly well.  Everyone, except Agustin, is cool with it.  It’s a huge relief actually.  I never thought my dad was a homophobe like Agustin, but I was still anxious.  I don’t have that hanging over my head anymore.”

“So, we don’t have to hide us anymore?”

“No,” Mateo said with a grin.

I grabbed, hugged and kissed my boyfriend.

“Oww!”

“Sorry!”

“It’s okay, but be easy.”

“My poor baby.”

“I will be fine.  Mostly, I already am.  Agustin is being a major dick about it, but Mom, Dad and Gabriel, all support me.  Dad got in Agustin’s face over it.  That was something to see.  The only really bad thing is that Agustin doesn’t want me around Magnus anymore.”

“Why not?”

“He thinks I’ll molest him.”

“Your brother is a stupid fuck.”

“That’s the general consensus.  My only worry is that he’ll teach Magnus to hate me and be a homophobe, too.”

“I bet your mom will have something to say about that.”

“Yeah, and my dad.  I’m not going to worry about it.  I lived in fear of Agustin finding out.  He has, so that’s over.  My dad said that if Agustin so much as lays a finger on me, he has to answer to him.  I don’t think I’ll have to worry about getting jumped again.”

“So, it all worked out pretty well?” I asked.

“Yes, except now I look like a very tall racoon.”

“A very handsome racoon.”

“Thanks, I think.  What exactly are you doing?” Mateo asked, pointing at the tin snips.

“I am installing a rain barrel, so I have to cut into the downspout from the gutter,” I said, continuing the task I’d nearly finished when Mateo walked up.

“Wouldn’t it be much easier to turn on the hose?”

“Yes, but rainwater is better for gardening, and we use a lot of water.  Catching the water that comes off the roof will be better for the plants and save money.  I only have two rain barrels now, but eventually, I’ll put one on every downspout.”

“The fun never ends.”

“There. It’s cut.  Now, we need to attach the elbow so the water will shoot onto the top of the barrel.”

I tried to get it on, but it wouldn’t fit.  I used the tin snips to cut up the corners and began to spread them out.

“You’re doing it wrong,” Mateo said.

“You think you’re an expert at this?”

“I know that if you do it like that, the water will run down the sides.  You need to make the elbow fit inside the pipe, not the other way around.  That will channel the water into the elbow instead of around it.  Let me have the gloves.”

“Smart as well as beautiful,” I said.

“Into the racoon look, huh?”

“I’m into you, period.”

I handed over the heavy leather gloves I was wearing to protect my hands from the jagged metal.  My boyfriend began to push in the sides of the downspout to fit inside the elbow attachment.  He had to push and pull and jam the attachment on, but finally it was done.

“Well, that wasn’t exactly simple, but the next will be easier,” he said.

We positioned the barrel on top of stacked concrete blocks and moved to the next downspout.

My boyfriend.  Those two words made me smile every time I thought them.  Mateo now worked in the garden with me more often than not.  I might never have met him if I hadn’t started this project.  I had envisioned a small rose garden at first, but my plans grew and changed and now there were people here every day, helping with chores and gardening their very own raised beds.  Sometimes, it was only one or two, but sometimes several at once.  I was never alone unless I wished to be.

“What are you thinking now?” Mateo asked, as he began cutting the next downspout and I worked on screwing the lid of the rain barrel into place.

“About how lonely I’d be if I hadn’t started this garden.  Dad would be gone all day and I’d be alone with nothing to do.  I would have spent all my time thinking about Mom.  Instead, I’m never alone and I met you.”

“I did make a dazzling appearance out of the sheriff’s van, dressed in orange with that ball and chain attached to my ankle.”

“You were not wearing orange.  You were dressed in normal clothes and there was no ball and chain.”

“Sure, suck all the drama out of it by inserting reality.”

“Hey, I was intimidated enough.  Any one of you could have kicked my butt.”

“You were intimidated, but I was thinking, ‘this boy with the dark red hair is so cute!’”

“Oh, you were not.”

“Oh yes, I was.  That was literally my first thought.  My second was, ‘I wonder if he’s into dudes.’”

“The answer to that is...”

I leaned in and kissed him, carefully this time, slipping my tongue into his mouth for a few moments.

“I’m not sure if I understand your answer completely,” Mateo said.

I did it again, this time longer and with more tongue.

“Yeah, I think you’re into dudes.”

“Maybe I was merely experimenting.”

“Your mouth on my dick last night says otherwise, but you can experiment with me all you want.”

“You have no idea how badly I want to experiment more,” I said.

“Oh, but I do. Believe me.”

I smiled.  “I’m a little scared, too.”

“Of what?”

“Sex.  I don’t know anything about sex, Mateo, except what we’ve done.  I mean, I know some of the things two guys can do.  I’ve watched porn and read some stuff, but when we... go further... well, I’m not going to know how.”

“I haven’t gone beyond a blow job either, but I have a good idea of what to do.  We’ll figure it out together and have fun trying.”

“I bet we will.”

“I wish we were alone right now.”

“In your fragile state, I might hurt you.  I wish I could rip all your clothes off right now,” I said.

“New topic, otherwise we won’t get any work done, and I have a problem,” Mateo said, looking down.

I followed his eyes to the bulge in his shorts.

“Me, too.”

We laughed about our matching bulges and returned to work.

I looked out at those working in the garden now and then and realized I hadn’t seen my Dad and Jessica for a while.  They were working together on one of the raised beds, but now they were nowhere in sight.  I frowned.

“Are you okay?” Mateo asked.  I didn’t realize I was staring off into the distance.

“Yeah, I just noticed Dad and Jessica have disappeared,” I said.

“They probably went inside.  I doubt they were abducted.”

“Them alone together inside is what worries me.”

“You think they might fool around?” Mateo asked.

I nodded.

“Come on, your dad isn’t going to do anything with her so soon after your mom died.  They aren’t in there making out or hooking up.  They’re probably doing boring old people stuff or needed a break.”

“I don’t know how I feel about her.  Jessica is nice, but it’s weird seeing her with Dad.”

“Of course, it’s weird.  She’s a woman, who isn’t your mom, with your dad.”

“What if she likes him?”

“That’s not a bad thing, is it?” Mateo asked.

“Dad seems happier when she’s around, but I don’t like it.  That makes me feel selfish.  I want him to be happy, but Mom only died a few weeks ago and here’s Jessica already.”

“It’s okay to have confused and conflicting feelings, J.C.  Maybe you feel like she’s trying to replace your mom.  I get where you wouldn’t like that, but even if she’s interested in your dad, she’s not trying to replace your mom, she just wants to be with him.  You can be upset about that and happy for your dad at the same time.”

“Yeah.”

“You know your dad.  What do you think is going on?”

“I know he’s hurting, because I am.  It’s not as bad as it was at first, but it’s still rough.  He’s trying to get by.  He misses Mom.  Maybe having Jessica around makes it easier.  Even if he really likes her, I don’t think he’ll want anything serious with another woman very soon.”

“So, you don’t truly have anything to worry about.”

“Probably not, but why does a part of me not like her?”

“Because she’s here and your mom is not.”

I turned my head and looked at Mateo.  I hadn’t thought about that.

“I think you’re right.”

“I’m not merely a gorgeous hunk.  I’m smart, too.”

I grinned at my boyfriend.  My boyfriend.  I could not get over that.

***

“We’re ready to help the old people,” Lawrence said.

“We are the old people, Lawrence!” Virginia said.

“Certainly not you.  You’re just a kid.”

“You’d better have your doctor check to see if you have cataracts,” Virginia said.

I laughed.  Twelve residents of the local nursing home were due to arrive soon.  They weren’t merely coming for a tour.  These were individuals who had expressed an interest in gardening.  Each was getting their own raised bed to grow what they wished.  June was getting on, but it wasn’t too late to start seeds.  We also had plenty of plants, some donated, others Adriana, Mateo, myself, and others had previously started from seeds.

Soon, the van pulled up.

“You’re on,” Virginia told me.

“Break a leg.  Wait, that’s for theatre.  Good luck, not that you need it,” Lawrence said.

I grinned.  I truly liked Virginia and Lawrence.  They were the grandparents I never had.

It took quite a while for the riders to disembark from the van.  Two were in wheelchairs, one used a walker and three had canes.  Some of the ladies were already talking, smiling and pointing out flowers to each other.

“I’m J.C.  Welcome to the community garden.  First, I’ll give you a little tour and then you’ll each get your own raised bed to grow whatever you wish.  We have lots of seeds and lots of small plants, so give some thought to what you want to plant in your garden space. You’ll find everyone here friendly and helpful.  This is Virginia and Lawrence, our official greeters.  They both know a lot about gardening and have their own plots here.”

“You might want to specify garden plots.  At our age, plot generally means something else,” Lawrence said, getting a laugh.

I didn’t get it at first, but then I figured out he meant a cemetery plot.

“Yes, a garden plot,” I said.

The nursing home group could only move slowly, so I talked as we walked.  I pointed out some of the beds planted earlier, our fruit trees and berry bushes and my plans for this to become a place where members of the community could not only garden, but also socialize.  I even talked about my own feelings of loneliness after my mom died and how working in the garden helped.

“One thing to keep in mind is that I’m always looking for suggestions for improvements,” I said.

“More seating areas.  Many our age can’t walk far or stay on our feet long,” said one of the guys.

“That is a good idea.  We have seating areas, but they are rather far apart.  Perhaps benches spread out over the garden, especially around and in the raised bed areas.”

Soon, I assigned raised beds.  Marsha had overheard the seating suggestion, and she and her twins worked to place chairs by each of the beds.

I was everywhere at once for the next two hours and couldn’t have begun to get everyone started without the help of Lawrence, Virginia, Marsha, the twins and various others who stepped up to help.  There was a flurry of activity as everyone selected what they wanted to grow and we brought seeds, plants, gardening tools and water to everyone.  I don’t think we could have handled it if the gardeners weren’t older, slower-moving individuals, some of whom often needed to stop for a rest.

“I found one,” I said, returning to the raised bed Ruth was beginning to plant.

I presented her with a beautiful geranium with red blooms, which was a plant she’d specially requested.  Ruth didn’t know it, but I’d taken it from one of the pots on our porch.

“Thank you so much, I want to put it right in the center,” she said, sniffing the leaves.  “I planted geraniums my entire life, mostly because I remembered my mother doing so.  She died when I was fourteen.”

“That’s how old I am.  Mom died a few weeks ago.”

“I know how it is, sweet boy.  It’s so hard, especially at first, but after enough time has passed, there are only pleasant memories left.”

“Do you remember much about her?  Someone suggested I write down memories of mom and I’ve been doing it.  I have pages and pages so far.  Writing about her makes me feel better and it’s almost like I’m with her again.”

“I wish I had thought to do that, but I remember a great deal about her.  Such as when she taught me to bake biscuits and I set the oven on fire or the time she scolded me for getting into her lipstick and putting it on.  I think I was ten.  She died over seventy-five years ago, but I can still recall the sound of her voice.  Geraniums don’t have much scent and yet smelling them brings back memories of sitting on the porch with my family on hot summer days.  I was one of twelve children and we’d often all sit out on the porch hoping for a cool breeze.”

“Twelve!”

Ruth laughed.  “People had larger families back then.  They are all gone now, my parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, brothers and sisters.  I’ve even outlived my nieces and nephews.  I am the sole surviving member of my family, but I have my memories.  Thank you so much for doing this.  Gardening makes me feel in touch with my earlier life.  It’s also nice to see new faces, especially young faces.”

Ruth reached out and caressed my cheek.

“You have such smooth skin.  You’re such a pretty boy.  I bet the girls follow you around.”

“Well, I’m not much interested in girls.  I like boys,” I said.

I didn’t know how Ruth would react, but she smiled.

“Then, I bet the boys follow you around.”

I blushed.

“No, but I do have a boyfriend.  He’s not here right now, but he spends a lot of time helping.”

“I’m so glad you can be so open about who you are.  One of my brothers was like you.  He kept it hidden from everyone, but I walked in on him kissing a neighbor boy.  I remember the look on his face.  He was absolutely terrified and began crying.  I walked over to him, hugged him and told him I loved him.  I was the only one in the family who ever knew about him.  He was too frightened to let anyone know.  I always thought it sad that he felt he had to live his whole life in hiding, merely because he preferred men.”

“That would be terrible.  I only told my dad recently.  He’s cool with it.  He said he just wants me to be happy.”

“He sounds like a wonderful father.  I don’t know how mine would have reacted if he’d found out about Sam.  My husband wasn’t supportive when he found out about our son, who was gay, too, but I let him have a piece of my mind and by the time I was done, he’d learned the error of his ways.”

I laughed.

“Charlie, our boy, was killed in an auto accident when he was twenty-one and it comforts me that he knew we loved and supported him.  His father came around quite nicely and considered Charlie’s boyfriend as a second son.”

“Losing him must have been terribly hard,” I said.

“Yes.  It took all the joy out of our lives for a long time, but we finally realized that mourning Charlie did him no good and that he’d want us to be happy.  So, we tried and eventually, we were happy again.  Not a day goes by when I don’t think of Charlie, and all the others who have gone before me.”

Mateo arrived as we were talking, waved and walked over to join us.

“Is this him?” Ruth asked.

“This is him.  This is my boyfriend.”

“Well, you did very well for yourself, didn’t you?” Ruth said.

“I think so,” I said, grinning.

“I did, too,” Mateo said, and put his arm over my shoulder.

“Oh, to be young and in love again, but I’ve had my time, more than I ever thought I would.  I’ll give you boys some advice.  Enjoy your lives as much as you can.  Do everything you wish to do while you can.  Before you know it, time will be up.  It will be too late to do much of what you’d planned.  If you live as long as I have, a time will even come when you can’t properly take care of yourself.  It all goes so quickly.”

I felt so sad for Ruth and I could tell Mateo did, too.

“Don’t you boys worry about me.  I enjoy living at the home.  I have friends there and am only alone when I want to be alone.  I still have interests and I spend my time doing what I want to do.  You see, I’m still following my own advice.  There are things I wish I could do that I can’t, but since there is never enough time to do everything, I focus on what I can do.  I also get out and do things when the opportunity becomes available.  When I heard about your community garden, I was the first to sign up.”

“I’m glad you did,” I said.

I spent a good deal of time talking to Ruth, but I also circulated.  Mateo did as well.  I spotted him here and there, getting plants, toting water and doing whatever else needed doing.  He was in his element and knew much more about gardening than me.

“Hey, J.C.”

“Well, there you are.  I thought you’d forgotten about us.”

“I have a life outside your garden,” Adriana said.

“What?  I’m not the center of your universe?”

“I think you’re confusing me with Mateo.”

“I don’t think I’m the center of his universe.”

“I think you and gardening together are,” she said, nodding toward him as he helped an elderly woman plant basil.

Adriana accompanied me to the next bed where a very elderly man using a walker was trying to plant zinnias, cosmos and other flowers.

“How is it going?” I asked.

“Not so well.  I wanted to plant flowers to cut later and take to my wife.  She’s in the home with me, but isn’t able to get out.  I used to grow flowers for her, but my hands shake so badly I can barely control the trowel.”

“How about I dig the holes for you and you take care of the rest,” Adriana said.

“That’s very kind of you,” the old guy said, taking in Adriana’s wild hair color.  “Can I ask you something?”

“Anything.”

“Is your hair bright pink or are my eyes playing tricks on me?  I don’t see so well, but your hair stands out like a beacon.”

“Oh, it’s very bright pink.  I like to try out different colors.”

“Bright enough it almost blinds me,” I said, earning a shove from Adriana.

“It’s so nice to see color well.  Everything is muted for me.  I can tell this zinnia on this seed package is red, but I’m sure it’s a much brighter red than I’m seeing.”

“Do you mind if I ask how old you are?” Adriana said.

“I’m ninety-three.  My wife is ninety-one.”

“Wow.  I’m fourteen.”

“I’ll leave you to it,” I said, moving along.  I could hear Adriana and the old man talking as they worked.  I could tell they were getting on well.

I circulated, helping out where needed, but what I discovered is that most of those from the nursing home simply wanted to talk while they planted seeds and small plants.  More than one told me it was refreshing to talk to someone so young.

The van load of nursing home residents seemed quite happy as they departed and all of them were returning.

“I thought old people were supposed to be prejudiced and stuck in their ways.  I told Dwayne, the ninety-three-year-old I helped, I was trans and he thought it was wonderful.  He said he couldn’t wait to tell his wife all about me,” Adriana said.

“Well, it is wonderful.  You should be you.”

“Let’s hope you can get your boyfriend to come out of the green closet.”

“Oh, he’s out now.  After his brother outed him to his family and they all learned he’s gay, admitting his love for gardening was a fairly minor step.  He hasn’t announced it, as far as I know, but he no longer hides it.”

“Be honest with me.  You thought it was pretty ridiculous that he was so secretive about his love of gardening, didn’t you?”

“Well, in a way, yes, but I also understand, especially after the way his teammates at his previous school reacted.  He was burned once so he didn’t want to stick his finger back in the fire.”

“That does make sense, but still seems absurd to me.”

“Are you two talking about me?” Mateo asked as he joined us.

“Yeah, J.C. was telling me he was surprised you have such a small one.”

“Liar, and you’ve seen it, Adriana.  You know it’s not small,” Mateo said.

“Oh?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.

“She used to sleep over sometimes.”

“You’re digging yourself in deeper, Mister,” I said.

“This was when we were younger, well before I met you and she only saw it when I was changing.”

Adriana stood there grinning during our exchange.

“It actually was kind of small,” Adriana said.

“Hey, I was like nine, okay?”

I smiled and shook my head.  “I can tell you’ve been friends for a long time.  Only old friends can be so mean.”

“Yes, and to prove how much I care about Mateo, I try to be as mean as possible,” Adriana said, putting her arm over his shoulder.  “I could tell you about his bad breath.”

“Oh, that won’t work.  I know he doesn’t have bad breath.”  Mateo and I grinned at each other.

“Ugh, this is getting too cutesy for me.  I’m going to go find someone to help.”

Mateo leaned in and kissed me.

“Is my breath okay?”

“Wonderful.”

“I just wanted to check.”  We grinned at each other again.  Luckily for Adriana, she wasn’t there to see.

Mateo

“I hate you!” Gabriel screamed.

“Oww!”

My little brother tromped into our bedroom with a furious expression on his face.

“What just happened?” I asked.

“Agustin!  That asshole asked if you’d ever molested me so I kicked him in the leg!” he shouted out the open door so our big brother could hear.

“Have a seat,” I said, patting the edge of my bed.

“I’m gonna go back and kick him in the nuts!”

“Whoa!  Whoa!” I said and grabbed Gabriel’s arm.  “Sit.”

“I am so mad I could...”

“I know.  I’m not too pleased he thinks I’d do something like that, but Agustin isn’t quite rational on the subject of sexual orientation.  I think, in his way, he’s also trying to look out for you and protect you.”

“You would never do anything bad to me.”

“True, but I think Agustin has a lot of wrong ideas about guys like me.  He probably believes guys like me do things like that.  Some do, and some guys that like girls do, too.”

“I still don’t like it!”

“I don’t either, but don’t be too hard on him.”

“He used to be nice, but he’s not anymore.  I don’t like him.  You’re a way better brother than him.  I wish he’d go away.”

A sound in the hallway attracted our attention and Agustin stood in the doorway.  I tensed, but then I noticed tears in his eyes.

“Why does everyone hate me?” my big, tough brother asked, holding back a sob.

“Because you’re mean, you beat up Mateo and you say nasty things about him,” Gabriel said.

Agustin looked at me.  He looked broken. I’d never seen him like this before.

“I just... I don’t know...”

He lost it and began crying.  I couldn’t even remember seeing him cry before.  I knew I was taking a risk and I might get my ass kicked again, but I stood up and wrapped my arms around him.  Instead of shoving me away, Agustin hugged me to him.  Gabriel looked on with wide eyes filled with confusion.

I was confused myself, but even more shocked.  Agustin was always tough and in control.  I’d been afraid of him my entire life.  He didn’t beat me up regularly, but it was easy to anger him and he smacked me occasionally, not a full-blown punch, but bad enough.

Eventually, he pulled away enough to look into my eyes.

“I’m... I’m... sorry.”

“It’s okay,” I said, as he began a new round of crying.

Gabriel chewed on his lip as he watched us and then came over and hugged Agustin, too.  That made him cry harder, but after a few more minutes, he settled down.

I pulled away, sat on the edge of my bed and patted it as I had for Gabriel to sit beside me a few minutes before.

“I’ve ruined my entire life, haven’t I?  I have a kid I don’t know how to take care of, I’ve lost football, Mom and Dad are disappointed in me and I’ve made both of you hate me.”

“I don’t hate you, but I’m not what you think I am.  I don’t know where you get your ideas about gay guys, but we’re not that different.  We’re not monsters and we don’t prey on kids.  I have a boyfriend and I love him the same way you may have loved a girl.”

“I’ve never loved anyone.  No one could ever love me.”

“Maybe that’s because you don’t love yourself.”

“What’s to love?  I blew it.  I’m nothing but a loser.”

“You love Magnus.  I know you do.  You take care of him.  You’re giving up football and you have a job, because of him.  I know Dad told you that you had to, but I also know you would have done the same if he hadn’t.  In your own, screwed up way you were looking out for Gabriel when you asked if I’d molested him, and you were looking out for your son when you told me to stay away from him.”

“I should never have done either.  I’m sorry.  I’m just so screwed up and I guess I’m afraid of what people will think when they find out about you, and what they’ll think of me.”

“Being gay is pretty accepted here in Verona.”

“Yeah, but I’ve always tried to be tough.  If you’re tough enough, no one messes with you.”

“I don’t think you have to be that tough here, Agustin.  Listen, the only reason I didn’t come out was you.  I wasn’t worried about what anyone else thought, but you’ve been such a homophobe, I was afraid that you’d, well, do what you did when you found out.”

“You were obviously right to worry.  I’ve truly screwed up everything.  It’s probably better if I move out with Magnus when I can, although I don’t know when that will be.  I ruin everything for everyone here.”

“No, it’s not better if you move out.  Mom and Dad don’t want you to and neither do I.  You’re sixteen.  There is no way you can take care of a kid on your own.”

“Yeah.  I’m such an idiot.  I let my dick think for me and ruined my life.”

“Listen, I know your life is screwed up, but you do have Magnus.  Despite the smelly diapers and the crying at night, he’s awesome, and he’s yours.  You have a son.  He needs you and maybe he’s what you need to grow up.”

Agustin looked over to our little brother.

“I don’t want you to leave.  I was just angry when I said that.  I don’t hate you, either, but I don’t like when you’re mean to Mateo,” Gabriel said.

“I won’t be anymore.  I don’t really get the gay thing.  I don’t see how any guy can..., but I’ll try to understand.  I won’t beat you up, and you’re not all that easy to beat up, by the way.  I’m still sore.  I won’t talk shit to you.  I don’t want you to stay away from Magnus either.  You’re good with him and you’ve helped me with him when I didn’t deserve the help.”

“That’s good enough,” I said.

“I’m sorry,” Agustin said, then hugged me.

“It’s okay.”

“It’s truly not, but I’ll do better.” He looked over at Gabriel.  “Are we good?”

Gabriel smiled and then gave Agustin a hug.

Magnus began squalling in the next room.

“I think that’s for you,” I said.

“Lucky me, except, I think I truly am lucky.  I can’t believe I have a kid.”

“You’ll make a great dad.”

Agustin smiled and then hurried to take care of his son.

“Good thing he’s going to stop being a jerk or I would have had to kick his ass,” Gabriel said.

“You, short stuff?”

Gabriel glared and cocked his fist back.

“I take it back!  I take it back!”

“A wise choice, big brother.”

I fought not to laugh.

Gabriel went outside and I was left alone in the room.  I could hear Agustin talking to his son in the next bedroom.  Everything had changed so fast with him and I wasn’t sure what had brought it about, but if I had to pick something, I think it would be Gabriel screaming ‘I hate you!’  Whatever caused it, I was relieved.  The tension in the trailer since I’d been found out had almost been too much to bear.  Only my time with J.C. and in the garden had kept me sane.

I thought of my boyfriend and grinned.  He made me happy, even when he wasn’t with me.

***

“I have a boyfriend!” Adriana practically screamed as she ran to where J.C. and I were watering fruit trees.

“Hmm, I thought you’d be more excited,” J.C. said as Adriana practically jumped up and down.

“I don’t think it’s possible for her to be more excited,” I said.

“Shut up, you two.  He’s amazing!  His name is Angus and...”

“Angus?  Sounds like a cow,” I said.

Adriana punched my arm.

“Oww!”

“Serves you right.  He’s so handsome and those muscles, mmm.”

“Calm yourself,” J.C. said.

“I can’t.  He knows I’m trans and he’s totally cool with it.  He said that doesn’t matter to him.  It’s a part of me and he likes me.”

“Well, there’s no accounting for taste,” I said.

I jerked away as Adriana tried to slug me again.

“When do we get to meet him?” J.C. asked.

“I don’t know that you do.”

“Oh, he’s an imaginary boyfriend.  Got it,” I said.

“You seriously want hurt, don’t you?” Adriana asked.

I grinned.

“He’s quite real, but I don’t know if I want him to meet either of you, especially you, Mateo.”

“Me?” I asked, putting my hand to my chest.

“Yes, you.  I know you’ll say something crude.”

“When have I ever said anything crude?”

“How much time do you have?”

J.C. watched us going at it with a smile on his face.

“I promise I will be nice, no matter how weird or freakish he is,” I said.

“I’m very happy for you,” J.C. said, and obviously meant.  That’s one of the things I loved about J.C.  He cared about everyone.

“He’s so amazing.”

“Big one, huh?” I asked.

“I wouldn’t know.”

“You need to find out.  It’s important information.  What if he’s hung like a first grader?”

“I would still be into him.”

“Sure, you would,” I said, patting her on the back.

“What if he’s enormous?  He could be so big you can’t... you know,” J.C. said.

“Not you too,” Adriana said.

J.C. laughed.

“They could work past that.  We’ve both had to,” I said.

“Bullshit,” Adriana said.

“If you bring him to meet us, I promise I will play nice,” I said.

“Promise?”

“I just did!  Yes, I promise.”

“I would like you both to meet him.”

“Why aren’t you making J.C. promise to be nice?”

“Because I know he will be.  You, I don’t trust so much.”

“I’m hurt!”

“Liar.”

I laughed.  I did that a lot around Adriana.

“Anyway, I have to go.”

“You just got here,” J.C. said.

“Yes, I know and I promise I’ll help out again soon, but Angus asked me out to Ofarim’s.”

“Have a great time,” J.C. said.

“You know, I’m feeling a little hungry,” I said.

“Don’t even think about it.  You show up and I’ll kick you in the balls!”

“Violent much?” I asked.

“I mean it.”

“Sure, ruin all the fun.  Okay, I won’t stalk you.  I’m sure it will be boring anyway.  Try to stay awake.”

“You’re impossible.”

“Thank you!”

Adriana growled, but still left smiling.

“She hasn’t been this happy in a long time.   I’m so glad she found someone.  I hope he’s good to her,” I said.

“She does have excellent taste.  She picked you out as a friend.”

“That’s true.”

J.C. playfully shoved me.

“She likes you a great deal, too, which is further evidence of her good taste.  I hope it works out.  Adriana does not need more rejection.”

“It must be difficult for her,” J.C. said.

“Yeah.  A lot of guys aren’t interested in her because she’s trans.  Quite a few don’t see her as a real girl.  Others are turned on by it, but their only thoughts are of sex.  Adriana has dreamed of having a boyfriend for so long and has never found one.  I’m glad she finally has, but I don’t want her to get hurt.”

“We will be here for her if things do not go well, now or in the future.  Even if Angus doesn’t live up to her dreams, at least she will know that a boy was interested in her and if one is, others surely will be, too.”

“Yeah, I do worry about her.  Adriana was my buddy back when she was Adrian.  Becoming herself was a difficult transition.  A lot of people weren’t so nice.  I’m glad I was.  That’s one thing I would forever regret screwing up.”

“You obviously didn’t.”

“It was weird for me when she first told me that she was actually a girl.  I didn’t quite get it.  I even said, ‘But, you’ve got a dick.’”

J.C. laughed.

“Did she slug you?”

“No, but she explained what she meant and I listened.  I really listened and told her I supported her and would always be there for her.”

“I knew you were a good guy.”

“I didn’t promise not to be annoying or crude.  That would have changed things between us.  I’ve always been annoying and crude with both Adrian and Adriana.”

J.C. hugged me.

“What was that for?” I asked.

“For being you.”

I puffed out my chest.  “Should we put a statue of me in the garden?”

“Only if it’s nude.”

“Hmm, I’ll have to think about that.  Listen, there’s something...” I trailed off, suddenly losing my nerve.

“What?”

“Well, I have a project in mind.  A garden project in my... community.”

“Oh, that sounds great.  You mean like a smaller version of this?” J.C. asked.

“Yeah, much smaller, but...”

My voice trailed off and a feeling of deep sadness and shame overcame me.

“Mateo, what’s wrong?”

I gazed at my wonderful boyfriend.  What would he think when he found out I lived in a trailer park?

Don’t be stupid.  He won’t care.

I was stupid.  I was worried.

“Mateo?”

“I live in, um, Graymoor Estates.  It’s, um, a trailer park.  I live in a trailer.”

“Okay, so what’s the problem?”

“That is the problem.”

“Hey,” J.C. said, taking my hand.  “I love you.  There is nothing wrong with living in a trailer.  I’d love you if you lived in a cardboard box.”

I smiled.

“That’s what I figured, but... I guess I’m worried that something is going to screw this up, screw us up.  You’re almost too good to be true, J.C. and it scares me.”

“Me?  Too good to be true?  You’re the hot one in this relationship, Mateo, and you’re good and kind.  You’re the one who is almost too good to be true.”

“Hardly.”

“You think I’m too good to be true?  Get a whiff of this!” J.C. said, and shoved his underarm as near to my nose as he could.

“Oh!  Eww!  That smells.”

“Yeah, I forgot to put on deodorant this morning and I’ve been sweating.  Still think I’m too good to be true?  I can probably manage a burp if you want or...”

“Okay.  Okay.”

“Seriously, it’s cool.”

“Thanks, J.C.”

“There’s nothing to thank me for, but you’re welcome.”

“You are so lucky to live in a big house.”

“It seems empty sometimes.”

“Try being crowded into a house trailer.  There are six of us and I have to share a room with Gabriel.  I love him to bits, but imagine sharing a room with a kid.  I have zero privacy.  I mostly have to jerk off in the shower.”

J.C. laughed.

“Yeah, you can laugh.  Agustin and Magnus are in the next bedroom.  That kid wakes me up every night.”

“Think of your poor brother.”

“Yeah, I hear him getting up to take care of his son.  I think he’ll actually be a good dad.”

“Are things still cool between you now?”

I’d told J.C. all about the incident.

“Yeah, he has trouble grasping the idea that a guy can like dick, but after everything that happened, he’s stopped being a homophobe.  I truly think it was Gabriel going off on him that got to him.  I don’t think I could take my little brother screaming, ‘I hate you!’ at me.  I have never seen Agustin cry before.”

“That would be hard and he’s dealing with a lot.”

“Yeah.  He’s trying.  I’m sure he would prefer if his brother wasn’t a homo, but he’s dealing.  It’s such a relief that I don’t have to hide it anymore.  I didn’t realize how much it was stressing me out.”

“I understand.  I wasn’t worried about my dad being a homophobe, but it was a relief for me, too.  There was a little part of me that was afraid he’d stop loving me.”

“I get it.”

“We’re both out now.  We have officially joined the gay boys of Verona,” J.C. said.

“Do we get a membership card or a certificate?”

“I’m afraid not.”

“Cheap bastards!”

J.C. laughed again.  I loved to make him laugh.

J.C.

“I love this!” Mateo said.

“I don’t know if it matches up to our previous dates, but I thought it would be fun,” I said.

Mateo took my hand as we walked toward the music and bright lights.  The park had been transformed into a carnival with rides, food booths and more.  It was just now getting dark enough for the lights to truly show.

“It must have taken you forever to set all this up,” Mateo said, then bumped my shoulder.

“I’m a very fast worker.  You want to ride some before we eat?”

“Yeah, after might have unfortunate consequences.”

“True and that would definitely detract from our date.”

“Also true, but it would add novelty and excitement.”

“With that in mind, want to ride the Revolution?” I asked, pointing to what looked like a large circle of lights, spinning fast.

“Yeah, that’s definitely a pre-eating ride.  Let’s hope everyone else is as smart as us or it could be unpleasant.”

I had purchased passes for us earlier in the day, which allowed us to ride anything we wanted, as much as we wanted.  We joined the line and because the ride held a couple dozen people did not have long to wait.  Mateo and I took one of the doubles that allowed couples to stand side-by-side and leaned against the pads at our backs.  I gave him a quick kiss as the ride began.

We spun around slowly at first, then faster and faster.  Mateo took my hand.

“Now I know what the clothes in the washing machine feel like during the spin cycle!” he said.

The park and the lights around us became a blur as they passed with ever increasing speed.  As the ride tilted, there were times we were looking almost straight down but the centrifugal force held us securely in place.  I couldn’t even lift my head when I tried.

We laughed as we spun around and around, but I began to feel slightly queasy.

We began to spin slower and the ride leveled out.  The blur of lights and objects became recognizable and finally the ride operator began to apply the brakes.  Several seconds later, we came to a stop.

“I am not riding this after eating,” Mateo said.

“Yeah, it was blast, but I think once is enough.”

My boyfriend nodded his agreement.  “Let’s try something calmer.  Oh!  Bumper cars!”

Mateo dragged me toward them with the excitement of a little kid.  We joined the line and didn’t mind the wait because we were together.

We hurried to the cars and both grabbed purple ones.  The ride soon began.  Mateo slammed into me almost immediately and I chased after him, but a little boy nailed me from the side and pumped his fist into the air.  I pointed at him.  He giggled and sped away.

I tried to get at Mateo, but was bumped and knocked about so much I couldn’t ram him.  The familiar sound of pedals squeaking, cars colliding, the snap of sparks from above, and especially the scent of hot rubber took me back to riding on the bumper cars at the fair when I was younger.  I was so young I wasn’t tall enough to ride by myself, but my mom sat me on her lap and let me steer while she worked the pedal I couldn’t reach.  I could remember her laughing as I giggled and squealed and Dad watching us over the railing.  I’d forgotten all about that fair and smiled at the memory.  I’d write about it when I got home and write about my date with Mateo, too.  I never wanted to forget either.

“We need to ride that again later,” Mateo said.

“Yeah, that’s one we can ride after we eat and I need revenge!  I never did get to ram into you.”

Mateo raised his eyebrows and put a shocked expression on his face.

“You want to ram me?  Perhaps over and over?”

“That’s not what I meant!  I meant with the bumper cars!”

“Sure, you did.  Want to ride the Scrambler?  That’s definitely a pre-meal ride.”

“Yeah, I’ve recovered from the Revolution.”

The scents of corn dogs, cotton candy, funnel cake, hamburgers and more assailed us and made my stomach rumble as we walked to the scrambler and joined the line.

While we waited, we watched as the Scrambler started to rotate and each of the three sets of four cars began to turn.  The ride moved faster, the rotation within a rotation jerking the riders around making them laugh.  It didn’t look that intense from our point of view, but I’d ridden one before and being in one the cars was an entirely different experience.

Soon, Mateo and I were seated side-by-side, sitting much closer than was necessary, shoulder to shoulder and thigh to thigh because, why not?  The ride began slowly, but soon we were whipped around faster and faster.  The motion within motion was disorientating and we laughed as we were flung around.  Mateo managed to put his arm around my shoulders to hold me close as our hair flew in the wind created by the motion of the ride.

“Yep, no chili cheese dog before that ride,” Mateo said, as we walked away and toward the food booths.

“What do you feel like?” I asked.

“A corn dog, followed by funnel cake,” Mateo said.

“That works for me.  You grab a seat, while I prepare supper.”

I went to the corn dog stand first, bought us each two as well as Coke Zeros.  I delivered these to our table and then went for funnel cake with strawberry syrup and plenty of powdered sugar.  I sat across the table from Mateo and smiled.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t arrange for us to eat on a pond, but I hope the atmosphere makes up for it.”

“This is perfect, J.C.  I love amusement parks and carnivals.  We have to ride the Tilt-a-whirl later.  That is the best ride ever, followed closely by bumper cars.”

“Imagine if we could put both in the garden!”

“That would be sweet, but it seems unlikely.”

“Yeah, it’s definitely not in the budget and I don’t think anyone has an old bumper car or tilt-a-whirl ride to donate.”

“While that would improve the garden, it’s amazing as it is.  I love being there.  I love helping everyone.  My tomato plants are looking good, too.  We’ll have bacon and tomato once the tomatoes began to come on.  I planted pineapple tomatoes that are the best and some pink Brandywine, too.”

“Pineapple was my mom’s favorite.  I can’t wait until that patch of sungold grape tomatoes begins producing.  The pre-school kids will love them.”

“How will we ever have time for school once it starts in August?” Mateo said.

“The garden will start winding down then, and there are plenty of others to take care of what needs to be done.  I can count on Virginia and Lawrence to watch over things.  The garden has already taken on a life of its own.”

“If you build it, they will come,” Mateo said.

“Isn’t that from a baseball movie?”

“Yeah, but it applies to many things, like all the flowers for the bees.  Once they began to bloom, the bees will come.”

“We’re talking about gardening, what a surprise,” I said.

“I can’t help it.  This summer has made me more determined than ever to follow my dream.”

“Good.  You should.”

“I love the music, the lights and all the sounds of the carnival,” Mateo said.  “If you listen, you can hear the carousel, the whir of the scrambler and, if I’m not mistaken, the sound of skee-balls rolling.”

I closed my eyes and began to hear what Mateo did.

“I hadn’t noticed.  I heard all that, but didn’t.”

“You have to be aware.  I pay a lot of attention to details.  I make it a point to stop, look and listen.  It’s easy to move so fast you don’t see what’s right in front of you.  That’s how I noticed you.  The others were focused on getting through their community service, but I saw you; your dark red hair, green eyes and beautiful lips.  I also noticed how you were checking us all out, especially me.  I thought, ‘Oh yeah, he’s interested’ and I was very pleased.”

“I was drawn by your wonderful personality,” I said, grinning.

“I think it was more my biceps and the way my chest presses against my shirt.  At least, that’s where your eyes went most of the time.”

I laughed.  “Guilty.  I couldn’t help myself.”

“I liked it.”

“Are you sure you wouldn’t rather be with a guy more like you, Mateo?”

“I am with a guy like me.  I’ve never met another boy who loves gardening like I do.”

“I mean, a jock, a guy with muscles.”

“We’ve been over this.  Muscles are nice, but they’re merely looks.  Okay, yeah.  I like sports so another jock would be a match there, but sports are a minor interest, while gardening is what I’m passionate about.  I’ll probably never play football after high school.  I might play in college, but probably not and certainly wouldn’t play after that.  I can garden my entire life, even if I’m doing it from a wheelchair or walker.  Watching the old people in the garden has taught me that.  It’s far more important to me than sports, so you, super-cute and adorable boy, are the best match I could possibly find.”

Mateo took his corn dog and seductively slid it into his mouth, but had to stop because he began to laugh.

“Thank you so much, now I’m not going to be able to stand up,” I said.

“I can’t either.”

“Not helping!”

Mateo laughed again.

“You drive me crazy, you know that?” Mateo said.

“No crazier than you do me.  The things I want to do with you... mmm, but I don’t want to screw things up by moving too fast.  You know?”

“Yeah, and what we do now is plenty hot.  I love the feel of your lips.”

“On your lips or...?”

“Both.”

“Same to you.  Okay, we have to stop talking like this.  I have a serious problem here.”

“Maybe I could slip under the table,” Mateo said.

“As much as I would enjoy that, we don’t want to get kicked out.  Okay, new topic.  What are we riding next?”

“The Tilt-a-whirl is a must and riding the carousel could be fun.”

“Yes, and we have to do the bumper cars again.”

“But not the Revolution or the Scrambler, I don’t want that image of me in your head.  You might never want to kiss me again.”

“Oh, we must also ride the Ferris wheel.”

“Definitely.   We could play skee-ball, too.”

“I am the master at skee-ball.”

“Nope, I am the master,” I said.

“We’ll see.”

I grinned, but then my mind went elsewhere.

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah.  I was thinking how I wish Mom could have met you.  I bet she’d be amazed I have such an incredible boyfriend.”

“I don’t think so.  I’m sure she knew how amazing you are.  She wouldn’t be surprised at all.  You are right about one thing.”

“What’s that?”

“I am incredible.”

I threw the paper from my straw at him.

We finished up with our funnel cake and then Mateo leaned across the table and kissed me.  Could this evening be any more perfect?

We rode the Ferris wheel next, holding hands the entire time, except when we were near the top making out while the wheel was stopped to let on passengers.

We returned to the bumper cars.  This time I rammed Mateo good, although he got me back for it.  After that, we sat side by side in a Tilt-a-whirl car and tried to squish each other when the force of the car worked to our advantage.

“Uh oh!  I think my corn dog is coming back!” I said.

Mateo pretended to try to escape, then we both broke into a case of the giggles.  My boyfriend was not only sexy, he was fun.

We rode the carousel next.  Mateo climbed on a dragon and I took the unicorn next to it.  We had to dismount for a moment to help two kids onto a tiger and a bear near us, but soon we were again side-by-side.

The music started, old-fashioned merry-go-round music, and we began to go around and around.  It was a calm ride compared to the others.  We moved up and down on our mounts while traveling in a circle.  All the lights made it magical.  Those in other parts of the carnival flashed by, while those of the carousel itself traveled with us, providing brilliant light.  I gazed at Mateo beside me, so handsome with his dark hair flying.  How was it possible I had such a wonderful boy in my life?

We returned to the bumper cars yet again, then Mateo challenged me to skee-ball.  He was good, but not good enough.  While he managed ten, twenty and even thirty points a ball without fail, I scored fifty points over and over.  I not only beat him.  I kicked his butt.

“I thought you were supposed to be athletic?” I said, feeling cocky.

“Oh, that is it!  We are going again.”

We did and I beat him once more.

“I’ve been hustled!” Mateo said.

“I told you I was the master.”

“Yeah, and you are.  For beating me so completely, I award you this,” he said, then gave me our hottest kiss yet, with tongue.

Mateo took my hand and we spent the rest of our time walking around the park.   We departed after I bought us cotton candy.  Mateo walked me home and kissed me at my door.  I was completely happy for the first time since Mom died.

***

“Is that English?  I have no idea what he’s saying,” I said as Mateo, Adriana and I stood back watching the auctioneer sell Lawrence’s stuff to the highest bidder.

“Yes, it’s English.  Have you never been to an auction?” Adriana asked.

“Yeah.  On-line.  I didn’t know they had auctions like this.”

“It’s the way they did it in the olden days and often still do here,” Mateo said.

“Listen and you can understand what he’s saying.  Someone has bid $50 for the dresser he’s selling and he’s asking for $75.”

I listened carefully and I began to get it.  The way the auctioneer spoke was somewhere between a chant and a song.  I had no idea why he didn’t keep it simple and just state the amounts, but the olden days were often hard to understand.

We walked over to where Lawrence sat under a tree watching the proceedings.  Virginia sat in a lawn chair beside him.

“I thought it would be hard to see all this sell, but instead, I like seeing it all find new homes,” Lawrence said to Dad, who was standing nearby.

“This is what we should have done, instead of paying movers to transport everything,” Dad said.

“Moving everything would make no sense for me.  Virginia already has everything!” he said, taking her hand.

“Not everything.  I remember carrying quite a few things to her house,” Mateo said with a grin.  I nodded.

“Yes, and I still wish you’d let me pay you.”

“After all the gardening stuff you gave us and all you’ve done in the garden, absolutely not,” I said.

Mateo, Dad, Chad and I had moved several boxes and a few items of furniture from Lawrence’s home to Virginia’s.  The rest Lawrence was selling today.

“There wasn’t much I wanted to keep, mostly photos and a few things with special memories attached,” Lawrence said.

Virginia and Lawrence had become very close.  I didn’t know old people did such things, but they’d decided to move in together.  They both seemed very pleased.  I was sure they’d been lonely, but now they had someone, and, to think, they’d met in the garden.  I don’t say ‘my garden’ anymore because it had ceased to be just mine quite some time ago.  It belonged to everyone.

Mateo, Adriana and I wandered off to look at stuff.  There were long tables filled with dishes, small appliances, bedding and everything one could imagine, except gardening items.  Lawrence had given me all that weeks ago.

“Ohhh, isn’t this something!” Adriana said when she found a very old and heavy blue and white sweater with raised letters that said, VHS.

“It’s something all right,” Mateo said, wrinkling his nose.

“I bet it’s from the ‘50s.”

“Whoopee, you found something old in Verona.  What are the odds?” I said with great sarcasm.  Mateo laughed.

“I’m going to smack both of you.  I’m going to bid on this.  I bet I’ll look great in it and Angus will love me in it.”

“I still think he’s imaginary,” Mateo said.

“Yeah, we have yet to see the stupendous Angus,” I added.

“You will.  We haven’t had time for you two yet.”

“Unh!  Unh!” Mateo said.

“I will punch you again!”

“Okay!  Okay!”

“Seriously, this will look great on me.”

Mateo and I looked at each other and shrugged.

“You’re hopeless,” Adriana said.

We continued to look around.  There was interesting stuff, like a record player that worked without electricity, old record albums and many things I couldn’t even identify.

Mateo and I got hungry, so we bought hot dogs and brownies from the Boy Scouts who were selling food.  We could have walked the few blocks to my house, but this was where the action was, such as it was.

We sat together under a tree eating, not far from Lawrence and Virginia, who were talking with various neighbors while they watched the proceedings.  We were nearly finished when Adriana appeared carrying the sweater.

“I bought it!”

“Um, congratulations?” I said, doubtfully.

“Yes, congratulations.  I am so happy,” she said and pulled it on.

“Adriana!  It’s eighty degrees and that’s wool.  Are you insane?” Mateo asked.

“I vote yes.”

“Doesn’t it look magnificent?”

“You are gorgeous in it, Dear,” Virginia said.

“Thanks, but I think I’ll wait until winter to wear it often,” Adriana said, pulling it off.  “Was this yours from school, Lawrence?”

I gazed at the old man sitting in the wheelchair.  It was hard to imagine him my age.

“It was.  I was on the football team way back then.”

“You played football?” Mateo asked.

“Oh yes.  I was good, but not quarterback good.”

“How can you bear to part with this?” Adriana said, caressing the sweater as if it was a puppy.

“Well, it hasn’t fit for a very long time.  It’s a part of my life that is long over.  Stuff means less as one gets older.  I remember some of my teammates and bits from some of the games and that’s all I need.”

“Well, I love it!  I will wear it often and keep it forever!”

I could tell Lawrence was pleased that Adriana valued his old letterman sweater so highly.  I liked it now that I knew its history.

Adriana wandered off again, perhaps to buy another strange item.  Girls were weird.

At the end, the house itself was auctioned off.  It was a nice old two-story home.  I’d been inside quite a few times.  It was in good shape, but nothing had been updated in forever.  It looked much now as it must have way back in the ‘80’s or even earlier.

The bidding began at $50,000 and went up and up until it stopped at $115,000.  Lawrence looked both surprised and pleased, especially because Chad and Marsha purchased it.  I knew they were looking at it because their home was very small.  This one had plenty of room for their family.

“What do you think about the price?” Dad asked Lawrence.

“I never thought it would bring that much.”

“What are you going to do with all that money?” Mateo asked.

“Oh, Virginia and I have big plans.  We’re going to use it eating at Café Moffatt,” he said with a wink.

“You’ll have to eat there a lot to use all that money up!” I said.

Chad and Marsha walked over.  Marsha hugged Lawrence.

“I’m so glad you two purchased it.  It was a wonderful home for the missus and me for years and years.  I hope it will be for you.  Maybe you’ll be energetic enough to fix it up,” Lawrence said.

“Oh, we have big plans,” Chad said.  “We’ll take good care of it.”

I noticed Dad smiling sadly at them.  He was probably thinking of when he and Mom bought a house together.  That was before I was around.  It was as hard to imagine my parents having lives before I was born as it was to picture Lawrence as a teen playing football.

Mateo

“Are you sure you’re ready to meet my family?” I asked J.C.

“I’ve met Gabriel.  He’s sweet.”

“He’s the nice one.”

“I am ready.”

“Have you had your shots?” I asked.

“Quit stalling.”

“Okay, but you were warned.”

I led J.C. into our trailer.  I felt distinctly uneasy to have him see where I lived.  It was bad enough walking through the trailer park, but now he was entering my actual home.  I’d been inside his.  Ours wasn’t nearly as nice.

“You must be J.C.” Mom said.  “Oh, you are as handsome as Mateo said.”

“Mom!  What did we discuss?  Remember, you’re not supposed to embarrass me.”

“Mateo goes on and on about you.”

“Seriously, Mother!”

“Okay, I’ll stop.”

“You better.”

J.C. grinned.  I think he was enjoying my embarrassment.

“Do you like chicken and barbeque?” Mom asked my boyfriend.

“Yes, very much.”

“How do you feel about pineapple with it?”

“I’ve never had it, but that sounds good.  I wasn’t planning to stay for supper...”

“Oh, please do.  I want a chance to get to know you.”

“Thanks.”

“I knew this was a bad idea,” I said.

“Relax, Mateo.  We’ll keep embarrassing you to a minimum.”

“You better.”

I tensed as Agustin walked into the room carrying Magnus.  He’d made a real effort to be civil lately, but would it hold now that I’d brought my boyfriend home?  He looked J.C. up and down as if appraising merchandise.

“So, you’re my brother’s boyfriend?” he asked.

“Yeah, I’m J.C.  Mateo is awesome.”

Agustin looked at me for a moment and then back to J.C.

“He can be.”

“He really loves Magnus.  A while back, when he was babysitting Magnus, he brought him to the community garden, along with Gabriel.  Your son is adorable.”

Agustin smiled.

“You want to hold him?”

I was a bit surprised my brother was willing to hand his son over to a gay boy.

“Yeah, let me sit down first.  I don’t want to take any chance of dropping him.”

J.C. sat on the couch and my brother put my nephew in his arms.

“He looks like you and Mateo,” J.C. said.

Agustin smiled again.

“Yeah, I’m pretty proud of him.”

I gazed at my brother.  I hadn’t heard him say that before, but from the expression on his face, I knew it was true.

“You’re so lucky to be an uncle,” J.C. said.

“I think so, although not so much when his diaper needs changed.  Phew.”

Agustin laughed.

“Mateo has been a huge help.  Everyone has,” Agustin said.

Who was this boy?  He didn’t seem much like my older brother.

“What do you think of him?” Gabriel asked as he entered the living room.

“Hey, Gabriel.  He’s awesome.  He looks like you and your brothers.”

“Yes, but mostly like me.  He’s very handsome.”

Agustin mussed Gabriel’s hair.

“That little guy has derailed my life, but I’m not sorry.  He is going to grow up to be amazing, and he’s going to college.  I’m going to teach him not to make all the mistakes I have.”

I noticed Mom watching Agustin from the kitchen, looking as if she didn’t quite know him either.  Magnus had changed him.  Was it like that for all parents?  I was kind of sorry I’d probably never know.

J.C. handed him back.

“Where is this garden area of yours?” J.C. asked.

“Oh, yeah, that’s what I really want to show you.  Come on.”

I led J.C. outside to the area behind all the trailers.

“I haven’t done much yet, but Chad brought out his tiller and helped me to break the ground.  It’s too late to plant most things now, but I planted the herbs and seeds you gave me.  Others in the park have started to bring in things, too.  It won’t be much this year, but I want to get all the groundwork done I can so that we’ll be ready to go next spring.”

“We have a lot of lumber left over and Ethan said we can have more.  We can build raised beds if you want.  I’m sure Adriana will help.  We can probably get Noah, too.  He’s been too busy to help out in the garden much this summer, but I’m sure he’ll come to help you.”

“That will be great,” I said.

“Fruit trees would be nice and...  Sorry, this is your project.  I don’t mean to take over.”

I laughed.  “It’s okay.”

“I’ll offer suggestions, but it’s your garden.  You know more about gardening than I do anyway.”

“Yeah, but I don’t know as much about creating a community garden.”

“Oh, I think you know plenty.  You’re there almost as much as I am.”

“I hope that’s not a complaint,” I said.

“Not at all.”

J.C. smiled at me and I couldn’t help but kiss him.  We didn’t get into a long make out session, but we kissed for several moments before stopping.

“I wish we could be alone right now,” I said when our lips parted.

“Me, too.”

“We can forget it here.  I’m sure word will spread throughout the trailer park that I was kissing you.  There is no privacy here, inside or out.”

“We’ll have our chance soon,” J.C. said.

“Yes, but not soon enough.”

“I like your family.  Agustin doesn’t seem at all like you described him.”

“He was nicer than expected in there.  It was almost like I didn’t know him.  Magnus has changed him.”

“For the better obviously.”

“Yeah.  Agustin and I won’t be living happily ever after as brothers, but he’s not the major dick he was.”

“That’s an improvement.”

“I think better of Agustin now, too.  If you’d asked me what I thought he’d do if a baby was dropped off for him, I would have told you he’d run off never to be seen again, but he’s stepped up.  He hasn’t even complained about not getting to play football this fall and I know it’s killing him.  Being a football player was his identity at school.  I love football, but it was Agustin’s life.  I can’t imagine what it’s like for him.”

“Just don’t get me pregnant if you want to play.”

“I don’t think we have to worry about that, but I am willing to try.”

“I want you to try, someday.”

“New topic!” I said because my shorts were beginning to bulge.

“Anything we need to do in your garden?”

“Not at the moment, but let’s go inside and I’ll show you the plans I’ve drawn up.”

We reentered the trailer and I led J.C. to the small room I shared with Gabriel.  My little brother soon appeared.  I wondered if Mom had sent him to keep J.C. and me from messing around, but likely he wanted to be a part of things.

“Here,” I said, handing J.C. a small stack of papers as I sat by him on the bed.

“Wow, you’ve done more work planning than I did on the community garden.”

“Once I got the idea.  I couldn’t stop.”

“You should see him gaze dreamily at seed catalogs,” Gabriel said.

“Who said you could speak?” I asked.

“It’s my room, too.  I’ll talk if I want!”

“Would you like a little brother, J.C.?  I’ll let you have Gabriel real cheap.”

“Not funny!”

“I’d love to take Gabriel home with me,” J.C. said.

“No, you’re doing it wrong.   You’re supposed to act horrified by the very idea.”

“No, Gabriel is awesome.  You’re lucky to have such a great little brother.”

“See!” my little brother said.

“Now he will be impossible to live with.  He’s horrible, I tell you.  Horrible!”

Gabriel giggled.  “You know you like me.”

“Well, I don’t think about flushing you down the toilet as much as I did.”

Gabriel crossed his arms and glared, but then grinned.

“No wonder you didn’t mind my suggestions.  They’re on your plans already,” J.C. said.

“Well, the community garden is the inspiration.  The garden here is mostly a smaller version.  It’s already catching on and it’s nothing to what it will be next year.  I’m going to plant strawberries for sure.”

“No!  You got him started on gardening!  My ears!  My ears!” Gabriel wailed.

“He’s very dramatic,” I said.

“I noticed.”

“I want to get foxglove started, too.  I haven’t been able to get foxglove out of my mind since we’ve started watching Gardener’s World together.”

“I can’t take it anymore!  Mom!” Gabriel yelled, racing from the room and making J.C. and me laugh.

“He must be an interesting roommate,” J.C. said.

“Yeah, but I’m only rarely tempted to smother him in his sleep.”

“He’s sweet.”

“Yes, but don’t tell him I said that.”

“It’s nice here,” J.C. said.  I shot him my best, yeah right look.  “I mean it.   You have a wonderful little brother, a nephew and your older brother actually seems pretty cool.  You have a mom and...”

J.C.’s eyes grew watery and he swallowed a few times.

“It’s okay to cry, you know,” I said.

J.C. nodded.  A tear slid down his cheek, but he didn’t actually cry.  I knew he missed his mom something terrible.

“You’re all here together.  This trailer is so alive.  My house seems empty most of the time, especially if Dad isn’t home.  Part of that is Mom not being there, but it’s as if a lot of people are missing.  I think of all the people who lived in that house, whole families and of the Christmases and family meals and all the living that took place there.  I feel sometimes as if I’ve stayed at a party after everyone else has gone.”

“I never thought of it like that.  When I’m in your home, I noticed all the space and think about how great it would be.  I’d love to have a weight machine, but even if we could afford it, there’s no place to put it.  There is never enough room here and it’s always crowded.”

“I get that, too, but there is a positive side to being crowded.”

“Yeah, I guess so.”

“Mom says supper is ready,” Gabriel announced.

“We’ll be right there,” I said.

J.C. and I stood.  I pulled him to me and gave him a quick kiss before we departed and walked up the hallway into the living room.  Dad was home and immediately smiled when he spotted J.C.

“You’re as handsome as Mateo said.  You remind me of myself when I was young,” Dad said.

“Mom has already embarrassed me enough.  She does not need your help and I bet you weren’t nearly as good looking as J.C. when you were his age.”

“Now, you’re embarrassing me,” J.C. said and blushed, which really showed with his light skin.

“Okay, maybe I wasn’t that good looking.  It’s nice to meet you, J.C.”

“It’s nice to meet you.  Thanks for having me here.”

“Oh, we all wanted to meet you.”

“That means they all wanted to torment me,” I said.

“We can accomplish two things at the same time,” Dad said.

“Funny.”

“Everyone come and have a seat.  J.C., you can sit next to Mateo.”

J.C. was in our trailer, getting an up close and crowded view of my crappy living space, but he was grinning and obviously didn’t think our trailer was crappy.  I began to relax more.

“Oh wow, this is good,” J.C. said after tasting Mom’s latest concoction.

“It is good.  I like the barbeque.  What is this?” I asked.

“Chicken with onions, peppers, melted cheese and barbeque sauce.”

“We need to have this again, and again.”

“Thank you, boys.”

Magnus began crying.

“It never fails,” Agustin said as he stood and retrieved his son from the little baby bed that was currently sitting on the couch.  Magnus quieted as soon as his dad picked him up.  “What is it, Buddy?  Are you feeling left out?  Come with Daddy.”

I noticed Mom and Dad smiling at each other in approval.

Agustin sat down and ate the best he could with one hand, while holding Magnus in his other arm.  My nephew was now quite happy.

“Let me cut that up for you some more,” Mom said and took Agustin’s plate.

“It’s like you’re three again, Mom has to cut up your food,” I said.  Agustin didn’t snap at me, or even scowl.  Instead, he smiled.

Our supper was simple, Mom’s barbeque chicken creation and plain buttered toast, but it was truly good.

“How is your garden coming along?” Mom asked J.C.

“Amazingly well.  I started out trying to do it all myself, but then more and more people have come to help and donated materials, seeds and plants and it’s really taken off.  Everything is beginning to grow and it’s all further along than I could have dreamed.  If I was doing it myself, I might still be struggling to clear the junk out of the lot.  Mateo is there a lot and is a huge help.”

“Probably because you’re there,” Gabriel said and laughed.

“Well, that is a nice fringe benefit,” I said.

Agustin didn’t say anything, but he also didn’t so much as frown.

“I’m going to spend some time helping Mateo get the community garden here going.  I told him earlier we have a lot of extra materials, as well as seeds and plants.”

“Yeah, we won’t be able to grow much this year because summer is getting on, but next spring we will be ready to go,” I said.

“That will be so nice.  What’s already there is wonderful.  I went out to cut chives yesterday and met Mrs. Epstein who was there doing the same.  She said to tell you how nice it is to have access to fresh herbs right here in the trailer park.”

“Great,” I said.

“Mateo has grown me flowers for years.  They are so nice to brighten up the table,” Mom said.

“Let’s talk more about how wonderful I am,” I said.

“You’re not a complete loser,” Agustin said.

“Stop, you’re embarrassing me.”

“Mateo is awesome.  Agustin doesn’t completely suck, either” Gabriel said, looking straight at his oldest brother.

“Watch it, Kid.  I know where you sleep,” Agustin said, which caused Gabriel to giggle.

“You’re so lucky to have brothers,” J.C. said.

“Like I told you earlier, I’ll give you a great deal on Gabriel.”

Gabriel growled.

“You don’t have any siblings?” Mom asked J.C.

“No.  It’s just Dad and me since Mom died.”

“Mateo told me about that.  I’m very sorry you lost your mother.”

“Yeah.  It’s rough and will never be okay, but Dad and I have kept going the best we can and it gets a little easier as time passes.  The garden has helped.  I’m going to dedicate it to my mom.  It’s her garden.  That was my plan from the beginning before it expanded into a community project.  Mom loved gardening.  She went crazy buying plants.  I remember hearing Dad tell her, ‘Step away from the plants.  The car is full’,” J.C. said, then laughed.  “Mom did have plant buying addiction.”

“Sounds like someone I know,” I said.

We talked all through supper and J.C. seemed as if he’d always been there.  He wasn’t the least bit uncomfortable and my parents obviously liked him.  I knew they were still adjusting to me being gay, but they seemed fine with it.  Agustin was probably having more trouble accepting it than anyone else, but he was hiding it well.

J.C. volunteered himself and me to clean up after supper and wouldn’t take ‘no’ for an answer.  Luckily, we did have a dish washer.  It was so old it had a knob and a lever instead of digital buttons, but it worked.

“You’re trying to get Mom to like you better than me,” I accused as we got to work.

“I don’t think that’s possible, but I always helped my mom and I’m used to cleaning up after myself.”

“Not so loud.  She’ll expect me to help all the time.”

“Too late.  I already heard,” Mom said from the living room, which was only feet away.

“See what you’ve done?  You’ve ruined my life.”

J.C. laughed.

It was weird, but I liked even cleaning up with J.C. at my side.  A fantasy of us buying a house together and living as a couple played out in my head.  I knew it was way premature, but it was a nice fantasy.

There wasn’t much to do in the trailer, so after our task, J.C. thanked Mom for supper again, said how nice it was to meet everyone, gave Gabriel a hug and we walked back toward town.

“That went better than I dreamed,” I said.

“Your family is great.”

“It’s not only them.  I was uneasy about you seeing where I live.  I’ve always been a little ashamed we live in a trailer park.”

“I like your home.  It’s decorated nicely.  I know you could use more space, but it’s cozy.”

“I’ve always thought of it as seriously overcrowded.”

“I’m sure six people and one bathroom isn’t a blast, but I like the togetherness.”

“Sure, you can like it.  You don’t have to live there.  I have discovered that sharing a room with my little brother doesn’t completely suck.  I can’t jerk off with him in there, but I couldn’t do that when I roomed with Agustin either.”

“Yeah, that does suck, but now you have other means of relief.”

“You just made me hard.”

“You saying that made me hard.”

“Good.”

I was hard and in need.  I grabbed J.C.’s hand and pulled him toward the cemetery, which we were just then passing.

“Here?  Seriously?” J.C. asked.  “Someone might see.”

“A little further on.”

I led J.C. through the cemetery and onto the abandoned lane on the other side.

“This looks old,” J.C. said.

“Yeah, there are foundations of homes up this way, but no one has lived here for years,” I said as we continued to walk.

I cut off to the side before the lane passed between high banks and looked around for a place we could use.  Before long, I found one that was sheltered by honeysuckle.  It was open toward the lane, but no one could see us from below.  I turned to J.C., pulled him close and kissed him.

We made out as we rubbed our bulges together.  I stripped off my shirt, then groped J.C.  He ran his hands over my chest and then replaced them with his tongue.  He licked down over my abs and then pulled my shorts and boxer briefs down with some difficulty because I was seriously hard.

The moment my pole was free, J.C. was all over it.  He was not in the least shy, but licked, sucked and slurped with such intensity I feared I’d pop in seconds.

I managed to hold off and gazed down at him.  The sight of my tool disappearing between his beautiful lips with his dark ginger hair partially obscuring his face nearly caused me to lose control all over, but I managed to hold off as he went at it.

I held off for a very few minutes, then groaned with release.  J.C. slurped greedily until I was done.

I immediately dropped to my knees as he stood and tore my way through his shorts and underwear.  I had him in my mouth in seconds.

I had some previous experience with Noah and put all my skills to work.  J.C. was moaning in no time.  He managed to hold off for nearly as long as I had, but then grunted and exploded in my mouth.  I didn’t pull away until he was completely finished.

I stood and we made out for a few minutes then pulled our shorts up.  I pulled my shirt back on and we headed back the way we came.

“I always did enjoy a walk in the woods,” J.C. said, then laughed.

“That was the best walk in the woods ever,” I said.

“We must take up hiking.”

“I love you,” I said.

“Me or my talented lips?”

“Both.”

“I love you, too.”

I took J.C.’s hand as we walked.  I was completely, totally happy in that moment.

J.C.

The scent of burgers and brats filled the air.  The garden was filled with kids playing and adults mingling.  Laughs and squeals issued from the bouncy house sitting in our yard near the garden.  A horseshoe tournament and other games were in progress.  No gardening was getting done at present because this was dedication day.  The plans for the dedication had started out as a simple ceremony, but like the garden itself, had grown.  It was now a community carnival, not one with rides like Mateo and I had explored in the park, but a community get together with food, fun and games.

Dad and some of the neighborhood men were working at the grills.  Other neighbors were placing bowls and platters of food they’d prepared on the long tables.  Kids were ruining their dinner with snow cones, and their parents didn’t care.

Mateo put his arm over my shoulder.

“Did you ever think your garden would turn into this?” he asked.

“Never.”

Adriana walked toward us, grinning.  By her side was a handsome boy with unruly brown hair.  They stopped in front of us.

“You wanted to meet him.  Here he is.  My boyfriend,” she announced proudly.

“He’s not imaginary!” Mateo said and looked at me as if astonished.

“Who would have thought?”

“You two are so funny, you know that?” Adriana said.

“We do try,” Mateo said.

“Hey, I’m Angus.”

“I’m J.C.”

“Mateo.”

I noticed his green eyes and mischievous smile as we shook hands.

“Hmm, he seems sane, don’t you think?” Mateo asked, gazing at me.

“Yeah, so not what we expected at all.”

“Oww!”

“Oww!”

Adriana punched us both in the arm, hard.

“There is plenty more where that came from, you two.”

“Are you sure you want to date someone who is so violent?” I asked.

“Oh, yeah,” Angus said, grinning.

Adriana latched onto his arm and put her head on his shoulder.

“Awe, ain’t they cute?” Mateo asked.  Adriana began to glare and my boyfriend was in danger of being punched again, but he saved himself.  “I mean it.  You are cute together.”

“Definitely,” I said.

“There are so many people,” Adriana said.

“Well, everyone wanted to meet your boyfriend,” I said.

“You didn’t know he was coming.”

I grinned.  “Want to check it out?”

“Yes, but not with you two.”

“I think we’ve been insulted,” I said.

“Hmpf!” Mateo said, then crossed his arms and stuck his nose in the air.

“Let’s get away from them while we can,” Adriana said.

“I guess we can continue to check it out ourselves,” I said.

“Yes, and I must get cotton candy.  I can’t believe Dad rented a machine for today,” I said.

People roamed all over the garden, admiring the flowers and vegetables that were now in full growth.  It was nearing the end of July and the garden had truly come alive.  The roses we’d planted only weeks ago had taken off and were blooming and filling the air with their scent.

We passed a ring toss game where kids tried to get rings to fall over bottles for prizes, which were mostly candy, but there were also donated used items like stuffed animals and toys.  Just beyond that was the cotton candy machine.  Mateo and I waited in line and soon departed with huge bags of pink cotton candy.

“Let’s check out the dunking machine,” Mateo said.

The fire department had loaned us their dunking machine, which they used for fundraisers and various dads had volunteered to take a turn in their tank.  This gave partners, wives and kids a chance to send them into the water below and thoroughly dowse them.

“Oh, let me at him,” Mateo said as we neared.

I took a closer look and noticed Kai sitting on the narrow bench above the water.  Noah was currently tossing baseballs at the target, trying to dunk Kai, who taunted him for every failure.

“Give it up, Noah.  With your puny arms you don’t stand a chance,” Kai shouted.

Noah tried and missed, three times.

“I’m nice and dry!” Kai said.

“Not for long,” Mateo said and whipped a ball at the target.  It went wide.

“Don’t try out for the baseball team, Mateo!  You throw like a five-year-old!”

Mateo tried and failed again, then again.  Kai laughed at him as he stepped away.

Brody, the least athletic of the community service boys who had helped clear the garden, took his turn next.

“Oh!  Why are you even going to try?” Kai asked smugly.

Brody threw the ball and it hit directly in the center of the target, sending Kai shrieking into the water.

“Good job, Man!” Mateo said, giving him a high five.

We moved on.  People stopped and congratulated me on the garden, but truly it was a group effort.  Only the work of many had made it possible.

Mateo spotted his parents, and Gabriel who had a bag of cotton candy.  A big surprise was Agustin, who was holding Magnus, pointing out flowers to him, and leaning over so his son could smell them.  He noticed me and walked toward us.

“You helped with all this, Bro?” Agustin asked Mateo.

“Yeah.”

“He helped a lot.  He’s done so much work here.”

“You guys did an amazing job.  Maybe next year, or the next Magnus would like to give gardening a try.”

“We’ll set you up with a bed,” I said.

“I’ll teach him a few things in the garden at home, too,” Mateo said.

“I think he’d like that.”

Virginia caught my eye and beckoned to me.

“I think you’re on,” Mateo said.

“Oh, man.  I think I’m going to hurl.”

“No, you’re not.  You know everyone here, J.C.  All of us like you, some of us more than others.”

Mateo kissed my cheek and pushed me forward.  I walked across the garden and toward the small raised platform that stood near a boulder that Dad and the neighborhood men had moved into place with the help of heavy machinery yesterday.  I wasn’t allowed to be present while it was set in place and Dad forbade me to lift the black cloth that covered it.  All I knew for sure was that it was a very large rock near the street edge of the garden.

Virginia called for attention over the loudspeaker and all was quiet before I reached her.  She stepped down and motioned for me to take her place.  I was super scared because everyone was looking at me, but then Mateo and Adriana smiled at me and Lawrence nodded encouragingly.

“My mom loved to garden.  My best memories are of helping her in the garden when I was little, and not so little.  When she was in the hospital, I took her flowers that we’d planted together.  Gardens and gardening make me think of my mother and make me feel closer to her.

“When I started work here, I didn’t plan for this to be a community garden.  I envisioned something small that I’d slowly create over time, but then one person after another offered to help.  Lawrence gave me every gardening tool imageable, the Selbys brought a truck load of lumber for the construction of raised beds and benches, others brought plants and seeds.  The garden grew, as gardens tend to do, and became not my project, but a community project.  Virginia came as an interested neighbor and soon became the garden greeter.  Her lawn chair is our information booth.  This garden is the work of so many.  My dad and I came here as strangers, but everyone has treated us as if we’ve lived here forever.  Together, we’ve all created a welcoming space where everyone can come not only to grow flowers and vegetables, but to interact and be with others.  I hope that this garden will be a gathering space for our community for years to come.

“My mom never set foot in Verona, and yet I can feel her here in this place and I know she would have loved it and all of you.  So now, I dedicate this space as the Ashley Billings Community Garden.”

I tugged on the black cloth, revealing the huge boulder.  The bronze plaque on the front read, “The Ashley Billings Community Garden.  Established 2022.”  There was a ceramic photo of my mom potting a geranium as a very young me looked on, inset in the stone.  It was all I could do not to cry.

Everyone clapped and I happily stepped down.  Adriana patted me on the back and Mateo hugged me.  Now, I could relax as the dedication became a community celebration.

“Just think, you started all this,” Mateo said, as we watched our neighbors laughing and talking, kids running around, people admiring the garden and sitting on the benches visiting with each other.

“Started yes, but without help I’d be lucky if I had a couple of rose bushes and a small plot of zinnias planted.  I never dreamed it could be like this.  The best part is I’m not lonely anymore and Dad is doing a lot better, too.”

I gazed over at my dad standing with Jessica.  She had become a very familiar face in the last few weeks, helping in the garden, cooking and doing things for Dad.   They’d become very close and I wouldn’t be surprised if she became my stepmom someday.  I didn’t like the idea of her with Dad at first, but she made him happy, and he needed her, so I was more than okay with her now.  I was sure even Mom would approve because all she’d ever wanted was for us to be happy.

I turned and smiled at Mateo.

“The very best part of all of this is you.”

Adriana cleared her throat.

“You come a very close second to Mateo, Adriana,” I said.

“I can live with that.”

I leaned in.  Mateo kissed me and pulled me into his arms.  I didn’t know how long we’d last, but for now I was utterly and completely happy.